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Beat Motel Zine

Beat Motel Zine

Andrew Culture

Welcome to Beat Motel Zine, the comedy-infused alt-music podcast! Born from a zine from the DIY scene, we blend laughs with punk, metal, and everything offbeat. Discover the weirder side of bands, from unintentionally funny stage antics to musical mishaps. Tune in for a profane, comedic journey through alternative tunes, where every episode is a laugh. Join us as we explore music's funniest fringes with a punk rock spirit! Can the alternative music scene and comedy mix? Of course they can; we'll prove it to you. Warning, episodes contain creative profanities in the vein of The Thick of It.

106 - Great album, terrible song
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  • 106 - Great album, terrible song

    In this week’s Beat Motel, Andrew and his co-host Dr. Sam tackle the odd world of _Great Albums with Terrible Songs_. Ever wondered why a near-flawless record gets ruined by a random ear-sore? Same here. Andrew dives into the trenches with Metallica, Kyuss, Radiohead, and others, pondering why bands sabotage themselves with tracks that barely qualify as filler.


    Dr. Sam treats us to a sociological study of the infamous “skullet” and rants about modern bands who go through music school rather than the gritty DIY route. This episode finds the two slipping into all the irreverent tangents you’d expect: a heated debate on the Doors, bizarre childhood habits, and the joys of listening to Busta Rhymes while teaching their kids about hip-hop. With witty jabs, a sprinkle of _The Office_ references, and some choice British slang, this week’s episode promises more laughs than it should.

    ### Riffs of the week


    #### Dr Sam's Riff

    - Ana Lua Caiano - Os Meus Sapatos Tocam Nos Teus (1.05)

    #### Andrew's Riff

    - Bizarrekult - Du Lovet Meg (1:40)


    ### Dr Sam's track choices

    1. Metallica - The Thing That Should Not Be (0.52)

    2. Guns N Roses - Anything Goes (0.14)

    3. Rancid - Life Won't Wait (0.42)

    4. A Tribe Called Quest - What? (opening)


    ### Andrew's track choices

    1. Kyuss - Yeah (entire track!)

    2. Radiohead - Fitter Happier (opening)

    3. The Replacements - Hootenanny (0:29)

    4. The Doors - Horse Lattitudes (0:18)


    Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com


    Mon, 18 Nov 2024 - 1h 01min
  • 105 - Singing Drummers

    In this episode, Andrew and Dr Sam dive into the world of singing drummers—because why settle for just bashing skins when you can also belt out tunes? Expect a thorough dissection of jazz chaos theory, led by Peter Evans and his so-called “three-stooges” approach to organised sound. The duo also explore Karen Carpenter’s dual talents, Red Fang’s unadulterated riffage, and Mastodon’s... well, let’s say, questionable riff decisions.


    Dr Sam throws in some knowledge grenades about jazz producer legends, while Andrew recalls a traumatic encounter with Reading Festival toilets that left him missing Mastodon for a “pressing” appointment. They also ponder how Robert Wyatt of Soft Machine managed to keep it together, both rhythmically and vocally, before a window accident shifted his life forever. From awkward gig moments to a deep-dive into prog jazz and even John Grant’s soundcheck playlist, this episode has it all—except, maybe, subtlety.


    _Featured Tracks and Artists_:


    - Peter Evans and friends with some chaotic jazz noodling

    - The Morons with "I Want to Stab You in the Neck" (naturally)

    - Anderson .Paak, making soul look way too easy on the Tiny Desk

    - Queens of the Stone Age, with zero Grohl vocals

    - Yoshida Tatsuya’s wild prog jazz

    - A head-turning pick from Soft Machine with Robert Wyatt singing and drumming


    Grab your headphones (and maybe a stiff drink); it’s a wild ride through rhythm, riffs, and a solid bit of nonsense.

    ### Riffs of the week


    #### Dr Sam's Riff

    - Peter Evans - Freaks (opening)

    #### Andrew's Riff

    - The Ruins of Beverast - Anchoress in Furs (opening)


    ### Dr Sam's track choices

    1. The Morons - Stab You in the Neck (0.10)

    2. Anderson .Paak - Heart Don't Stand a Chance (from NPR tiny desk) : 3.57

    3. Soft Machine - Moon in June (0.20)

    4. Koenjihyakkei - Rattims Friezz (1.44)


    ### Andrew's track choices

    1. The Carpenters - Close to you (1:15)

    2. Mastodon - Blood and Thunder (opening)

    3. Queens of the Stone Age - Song for the dead (0:02)

    4. Velvet Underground - After Hours


    Email us - beatmotel@lawsie.com



    Anderson .Paak - Heart Don't Stand a Chance (from NPR tiny desk) : 3.57 - https://youtu.be/ferZnZ0_rSM?feature=shared&t=237

    Mon, 11 Nov 2024 - 1h 01min
  • 104 - Non English language tracks

    In this episode of Beat Motel Andrew is joined by Dr Hannah. Join us as we dive into non-English music, from French hip-hop to North African future funk and Italian soap-opera jams. Along the way, we touch on archaeology, conspiracy theorists, and of course, toilet humor – because what’s a Beat Motel episode without that?


    We chat about:


    - Dr. Sam’s political philosophy doctorate (no, he can't save lives).

    - Sparks’ 70s awkward sexiness and North African beats that sound straight out of _The Fifth Element_.

    - Anime, cyberpunk, and Blade Runner-inspired 80s Japanese pop (shout-out to _Bubblegum Crisis_ fans).

    - Icelandic shout-singing with Bjork before she got _really_ weird.

    - French hip-hop legends that groove smoother than my grandmother's custard.


    Hold onto your milking stools (yes, we explain that), as we explore weird instrumentals, wax lyrical about vinyl obsessions, and debate which music genre has the weirdest accents. Also, if you’re into Matt Berry and his mysterious music career, we’ve got you covered.


    Dr. Hannah's knowledge runs deep, and we pretend to keep up.

    ### Riffs of the week


    #### Dr Hannah's Riff

    - Sparks - Happy Hunting Ground (2:54)

    #### Andrew's Riff

    - Norma Tanega - You're dead (opening)


    ### Dr Hannah's track choices

    1. Abdel Kader (Live à Bercy, Paris / 1998) (2:56)

    2. Bubblegum Crisis - Konya wa Hurricane (2:46)

    3. Maria Arnal i Marcel Bagés - Tú Que Vienes a Rondarme (1:50)

    4. Mina - Se telefonando (2:20)

    ### Andrew's track choices

    1. Sugarcubes - Birthday (Icelandic Version) (2:00)

    2. MC Solaar - Nouveau Western (1:47)

    3. WIZO - Quadrat im Kreis (1:30)

    4. Adriano Celentano - Prisencolinensinainciusol (2:05)


    Hannah made a playlist of her tracks! https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1R19nDqVi8F8JplAjOalJq?si=gG518yOgSAu3O0hh4_tnfQ&pi=di55wqNKTg-f-




    Mon, 04 Nov 2024 - 1h 08min
  • 103 - Multiple songwriters in one band & great band, terrible decision

    In this episode of "Beat Motel," Andrew Culture and _Spamuel Rage_ (because who else could conjure up such bizarre music choices?) return to the long-anticipated second half of their chaos-fueled breakdown: _Great Band, Terrible Decision_. Naturally, things get out of hand, with deep dives into bands that alienate their own fans, riffs that make zero sense, and Devon Townsend’s baffling alien coffee addiction (yes, seriously).


    Expect more music geekery, deranged anecdotes, and Andrew’s rants about Finnish milkmen’s stiffy-shaped bottles—because why not? They also explore what happens when you ask your partner, mid-act, “Who’s making love?”—results vary.


    Highlights:


    - ASMR misfires and a thorough misunderstanding of the purpose of _ASMR_ (what even is it?!)

    - Andrew Culture’s near-confession about allotment-based dogging (we're all left hanging, thank God).

    - How _King Prawn_ went from experimental brilliance to “WTF were they thinking?”

    - The horror of strapping young lads deciding to ditch metal for ‘comedy’. Spoiler: it wasn't funny.

    - Why asking random bus-stop strangers “Who's making love?” in Finland leads to awkward silence and not much else.


    It’s a wild ride as always, with random bouts of technical difficulties and Andrew Culture monologuing about _Spamuel Rage_’s suspiciously symbolic tassels. Oh, and they manage to insult at least three beloved bands (because that's how they roll).


    Listen for laughs, questionable musical taste, and a slight risk of learning absolutely nothing.

    ### Riffs of the week


    #### Dr Sam's Riff

    - Johnnie Taylor - Who's Making Love (opening)

    #### Andrew's Riff

    - At the drive in - Cosmonaught (opening)


    ### Dr Sam's track choices

    1. Misfits - Forbidden Zone (0.07)

    2. King Prawn - Smoke Some Shit (1.00)

    3. Mos Def - Rock N Roll (3.45)

    4. Devin Townsend - Tall Latte (0.30)


    ### Andrew's track choices

    1. Ride - Drive Blind (2:30)

    2. Spacemen 3 - Revolution (4:10)

    3. The Buzzcocks - Boredom (1:38)

    4. Radiohead - Pyramid Song (2:02)



    Mon, 28 Oct 2024 - 57min
  • 102 - Bands who change members, for better or worse

    Strap yourselves in, folks, because this week Andrew Culture is joined by _David Jago_, and they’re taking a full-throttle dive into the wonderful (and sometimes catastrophic) world of bands who can’t keep a lineup straight. From Radiohead’s unbreakable five-piece to Faith No More's revolving door of members, this episode is a chaotic journey through rock and metal history. Ever wondered what happens when a 17-year-old guitarist joins a band mid-tour? Or when you replace drummers so often it feels like hiring temps at an office job? You're in the right place.


    David Jago starts things off with a beautiful ode to Radiohead’s _Airbag_, not just for Jonny Greenwood's guitar wizardry, but for the sneaky bass lines no one ever talks about. We drift into Faith No More territory, where Jago talks about their early rap-metal influence, reminding us that Korn may have just cribbed their sound from Mike Patton’s nightmares. But of course, Andrew has to bring us down with tales of gigs ruined by awful fans. V Festival, we’re looking at you.


    The theme of the week is "Bands Who Change Members for Better or Worse" – and, oh boy, does this episode deliver on that. Public Image Ltd, Korn, Fleetwood Mac, and the Sex Pistols – it’s a lineup circus, and no one is getting out alive. Andrew and David wax lyrical (and sarcastic) about drummers who can’t be replaced, guitarists who can, and band reunions that should’ve stayed dead.


    Whether you're here for Flea’s slapping basslines, Ginger Baker’s drum tantrums, or just to figure out how many members Suede have gone through, this episode has you covered. It's punk, it's metal, it’s Neil Finn and Stevie Vai in the same sentence, and it’s a gloriously irreverent mess.


    You’ll laugh, you’ll wince, you might even shed a tear for the mayonnaise-eating Korn fans. Tune in, buckle up, and get ready for a deep dive into rock and roll’s most dysfunctional families.


    **Show Highlights**:


    - The underrated magic of Colin Greenwood's bass in _Airbag_

    - Faith No More and their near-decade head start on Korn

    - The nightmare that was V Festival 2002 (never forget, never forgive)

    - Suede's teenage guitar prodigy – what happened when Bernard Butler said, "me or the producer?"

    - Public Image Ltd and their rotating cast of rock legends, including Steve Vai and Ginger Baker (yes, really)

    ### Riffs of the week


    #### Jago's Riff

    - Radiohead - Airbag (opening)

    #### Andrew's Riff

    - Zero Down - Down this road (0:12)


    ### Jago's track choices

    1. Faith No More - As the worm turns (1.11)

    2. KoRn - Good God (2:20)

    3. Sex Pistols - E.M.I (1:13)

    4. Queen - The Hero (1:00)


    ### Andrew's track choices

    1. Public Image Ltd - Ease (4:55)

    2. Gravediggaz - Fairytalez (3:30)

    3. Suede - Stay Together (6:33)

    4. Wolfheart - Ancient Cold (3:15)



    BAND MEMBER LEADERBOARD

    PIL - 18

    Faith No More - 13

    Sex Pistols - 8

    Korn - 6

    Suede - 6

    Queen - 5

    Gravediggaz - 4


    Mon, 21 Oct 2024 - 1h 12min
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