Hacking Emotional Intelligence

EQ AT WORK, EQ AT HOME - Don’t miss this engaging conversation! Tyler swaps provocative questions and thoughtful answers with guest Whitney Johnson: author, speaker, trainer, coach, disrupter & EQ master. Whitney Johnson is the CEO of human capital consultancy Disruption Advisors, an Inc. 5000 2020 fastest-growing private company in America. One of the fifty leading business thinkers in the world (#14) as named by Thinkers50, Whitney and her team are expert at helping people grow their people to grow their organization. She was a LinkedIn Top Voice in 2020, and hosts the weekly Disrupt Yourself podcast. Little known fact: She is obsessed with K dramas. https://whitneyjohnson.com/ Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

WAS IT SOMETHING I SAID? In this episode, Tyler explores how we sometimes -- okay, usually -- share some responsibility for the conflicts that involve us. AND for solving them. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

WISE WORDS - Tyler talks with Michelle Melendez about her life, relationships, EQ and more. So much goodness in this feature-length episode! Here are some topic timestamps: 0:01:47 - growing up in truly rural Alaska 0:10:16 - leaving home for a wider world 0:20:56 - a 6-year-old suddenly enters her life 0:24:04 - abuse, growth & forgiveness 0:33:06 - change & rolling with the punches 0:39:52 - the blended family grows 0:49:44 - culture, communication, discipline, authority 1:06:40 - emotional intelligence, listening & being real 1:18:59 - nutrition, health, Lupus + a plug for Isagenix! 1:32:15 - creating 5-Star Experiences for your body You can reach Michelle via email at: isagenix.michellemelendez@gmail.com She's on Instagram at michelle_isaqueen2019 Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

“I MADE A LOT OF MISTAKES” - Tyler talks with a former colleague and mentor, Evan Pincus, about Emotional Intelligence as a differentiator, and the journey of personal EQ development. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

RELATIONSHIPS THAT FEEL LIKE BATTLES? Do you feel some of the people in your life are on an opposing team? Tyler extrapolates from a rewarding experience when he chose to cross the line from resisting to collaborating. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

STUBBORN! We’ve all been there. Can you appreciate an opinion that’s very different from your own? In this episode, Tyler considers the potential connection between being stubborn and not respecting the opinions of others. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

POOP? ROCKS? Do you want to avoid the tempting “us-against-them” mentality? In this episode, Tyler discusses the tremendous importance of Perspective Taking. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

“THAT’S RIDICULOUS!” - Has anyone asked you to do something that seemed completely ridiculous? What did you do? Tyler has a few ideas for using such moments to build the relationship. Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

STORY MATCHING? INTENTIONAL METAPHORS? How can you avoid putting people in boxes? Or move past how an experience made you feel to appreciate what it did for you? Andrew Webb returns to share several “Micro-Behaviors” that can boost your emotional intelligence. Check out Andrew’s excellent podcast at: https://mymicrobehaviors.com/the-pod/

DO YOU JUDGE OTHERS? Do you also try to understand their situation? In this episode, Andrew Webb, member of the Behavior Design Lab at Stanford University, joins Tyler to discuss history, presentism, and the Fundamental Attribution Error. Check out Andrew’s excellent podcast at: https://mymicrobehaviors.com/the-pod/

DO IT FOR YOUR FUTURE SELF - What perspective-taking activities will help you decrease future regret? Listen and find out. "Of all sad words of tongue and pen, the saddest are these: It might have been." -John Greenleaf Whittier Follow The 5-Star Approach on: • LinkedIn https://www.linkedin.com/company/the-5-star-approach • Facebook https://www.facebook.com/5starapproach • Instagram https://www.instagram.com/5starapproach/

PODCASTS AS A FORM OF JOURNALING - Tyler relates how he approached making a podcast, and how it helped him increase his emotional intelligence. Interested in starting your own? He shares some tips in this episode... You can find more episodes of THIS podcast on: Spofity - bit.ly/Spotify_5-Star Apple Podcasts - bit.ly/Apple_5-Star Google Podcasts - bit.ly/Google_5-Star Simplecast (browser) - bit.ly/podcast_5-Star

5 REASONS, 5 STARS - Tyler shares why he started the “Hacking Emotional Intelligence” podcast, and why he created the 5-Star Approach.

“IT DOESN’T HURT LESS. YOU JUST GO FASTER.” Adam Kreek is back! In this engaging episode, he and Tyler discuss pain, coaching, hard skills versus soft skills, deliberate practice, values, motivations, relationships, conflict, the workplace, leadership, and more... Learn more about Adam: https://www.kreekspeak.com/ Gallup CliftonStrengths: https://www.gallup.com/cliftonstrengths/en/home.aspx

STORY TIME WITH ADAM KREEK. Adam is an executive coach, speaker, consultant, and the author of The Responsibility Ethic. Before all of that, however, he was winning Olympic gold medals and rowing across the Atlantic Ocean! This episode is heavy on adventure, and sets up a conversation with Tyler about emotional intelligence in the next episode. Learn more about Adam and his book: https://www.kreekspeak.com/ Watch the video, “Dateline:Capsized” on NBC: https://www.nbcnews.com/video/capsized-part-1-226589251691

In this episode, Tyler welcomes his 10-year-old daughter. They discuss his first BOOK, THE 5-STAR APPROACH TO PARENTING, which she helped write -- and which is available on Amazon: https://amzn.to/3e2qxbl Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

EVER HEAR SOMEONE ASK: “I’m confused. Can you help me understand?...” In this episode, Tyler explains how such statements can erode trust and damage your personal brand -- and what you can say instead. Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

PLAYING THE VICTIM COSTS YOU - power, influence, reputation and more. Tyler shares how he found much greater success when he learned to stop playing the victim. Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

HOW NOT TO DIE when driving… or in relationships. Most people feel like they’re contributing more than 50% in their relationships. How is that possible? It’s not! Here’s what you can do about it. Hey - Don't forget to connect with The 5-Star Approach on LinkedIn, Facebook & Instagram!

ELIZABETH LEIBA joins us again, as she and Tyler discuss specific ways to navigate potentially thorny situations and conversations -- how to hack emotional intelligence in racial contexts. We hope that, after listening to this episode, you’ll feel safer and more comfortable engaging in conversations about race. Elizabeth has been teaching Black History and Culture for over a decade, has been quoted in the New York Times (and other prestigious publications), and has founded Black History and Culture Academy. Check out her site -- https://www.blackhistorycultureacademy.com/ -- and use the coupon code: HEI2021 for half off your first month. (That’s HEI2021, as in H- for “Hacking,” E- for “Emotional,” and I for “Intelligence.”) Enjoy!

We welcome special guest Elizabeth Leiba! Elizabeth has been teaching Black History and Culture for over a decade, has been quoted in the New York Times (and other prestigious publications), and founded Black History and Culture Academy. We talk about the bigger picture of racism in America, and how understanding it can boost our emotional intelligence. Check out her site -- https://www.blackhistorycultureacademy.com/ -- and use the coupon code: HEI2021 for half-off your first month. (That’s HEI2021, as in H- for “Hacking,” E- for “Emotional,” and I for “Intelligence.”) Enjoy!

HAVING A BAD DAY? It happens to everyone. But it does NOT have to be Permanent, Personal or Pervasive. WHAT’S THE ANTIDOTE to your negative, bad day emotions? Gratitude and Perspective.

Do you have a five-star relationship with yourself? Do you want to? From thanking yourself, to apologizing to yourself, to planning great experiences for yourself — the five-star approach can help you do it. Listen to learn how...

People who believe in some kind of “higher power” tend to be happier than those who don't. How would you rate your relationship with your higher power? Can the 5-Star Approach help you make it better? Join us to find out.

Writing page after page in a journal may not be a sustainable daily routine for most people. However, answering these questions just a few times can help you change the way you think. An excellent way to hack your emotional intelligence (EQ).

Is someone’s request too easy? Run with it!

Have you ever just wanted someone to meet you halfway? I’ll tell you why you might want to hold off on making this super basic request.

What in the world is Psychological Safety, and why do we need it? In this episode we’ll talk about cavemen, boxers, and how to help other people feel comfortable around you.

Yes, I was once a “Taker.” No more! In this episode I’ll explain what a Taker is and how to be more of a Giver.

You just want more simple emotional intelligence hacks? I’ve given them to you in this episode. You’re Welcome :)

What are some super dumb things you shouldn’t say? I’ll share 35 of them in this episode, and I’ll recommend the book that can help you understand how to avoid hurting people’s feelings, without having to walk on eggshells.

Cutting in line and leaving work early are taboo actions you typically want to avoid. However, in this episode, I’ll share how to get away with it, without upsetting anyone.

Have you ever wondered what your blind spots are? In this episode I share why I bought worthless train tickets for my son and I, and I give some tips for overcoming our blind spots.

In this episode, Allen Larsen joins us and reviews some of his best tips and tricks from working as a leader in the US Army, Convergys, and Teleperformance (over 100,000 employees). He is currently the Managing Director of Global Learning and Development at Continuum.

The world famous executive coach, Marshall Goldsmith, has had a huge impact on me personally, and in this episode I share his biggest nuggets (that I think about and use every day).

A lot changed during 2020. Now that face masks are the new normal, it can be harder to know what another person is feeling. Have you ever wondered what you’re missing under someone’s mask? Are they smiling or frowning under there? Learn the secrets of reading facial expressions in this episode.

What do poopy diapers have to do with emotional intelligence? In this episode, I’m going to share the three steps of The 5-Star Approach in the context of a poopy diaper. Enjoy!

The easiest way, by far, to start building a 5-Star Relationship is by using The 5-Star Thank You. It’s easy. Try it!

Do you avoid apologizing? Do you have trouble apologizing? Is it scary? I’ll show you how to apologize in a way that’s not so scary, with real examples. You can do it!

But wait? What IS emotional intelligence? In this episode I define what I mean when I say “emotional intelligence,” I outline the major concepts of emotional intelligence, and I share my framework of how to improve it in a very practical way.

Guest Samuel Norton and I discuss several emotional intelligence hacks. SlideTech and The 5-Star Approach both work on the premise that real time quantitative feedback is a game changer when it comes to getting stuff done.

What do you have to gain from putting “The 5-Star Approach” to work in your life? Beyond making better decisions and getting more done, there are many personal benefits. I’ll review many of them in this episode.

Alright. I’ve been going on for 8 episodes about my back story. This episode covers the basics of The 5-Star Approach. I hope you can make it worthwhile by committing yourself to utilize the method, and let me know how it goes. Email me at Tyler@5starapproach.com

Have you ever started a company? I’ve started a few, but I’ve never had such a deep intentionality and sense of purpose before. For me, it’s a sense of calling. Here’s how it all began. Certainly it was born out of research, experience, and necessity.

A job offer with an increase in responsibility and impact can be very appealing, especially if it comes with a huge pay jump. This episode takes you through some of the most difficult career moments I’ve endured, including some of my biggest regrets.

Figuring out how to get a promotion was tough. With some help from Marshall Goldsmith, and a lot of experimentation, I eventually nailed it. Here’s how I did it.

After 5 years of consulting, I was terrified to get a J.O.B. To my surprise and delight, it was actually a really positive experience (especially the people I worked with) and a huge set of building blocks for my career.

Finding a job during a recession is tough enough. When you have no practical experience, it’s even harder. Here’s what I did…

Grad school has been a positive experience overall. Yet sometimes I wondered if it was all just a waste of time, especially when I was looking for my first job afterward.

Finding the right mentor and grad program was a huge luck break for me. A mentor can go a long way.

Have you figured out what you want to do when you grow up? I have. But I didn't realize it until looking back over 20 years of my life history. It began in a single moment...