Memento Mori Lab

Should we really be looking for ourselves? Maybe this whole trying to find myself journey is a hoax and there’s a better way, but it’s hard to swim against the current when you don’t even know where you’re swimming to.

This episode is even more confusing than this description but it might all make sense in the end.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Seasons - Available on Not Poetry (Medium publication)

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In a Box

I could fit just fine at first.

The box had enough room.

Me and my delusions.

But I grew a bit taller,

The box felt smaller,

Until I could no longer be.

I did what we all do,

Replaced it for a bigger one.

For me and more delusions.

I kept the memories in a shoebox.

Tokens of a well-lived cardboard life.

After years of changing boxes, I realized,

No matter the size, I'd always outgrow them.

None of them could last forever.

I would not last forever.

Why waste time on the perfect fit for a day?

I was never meant to be in a box.

Nothing will fit anymore and that's for the better.

-

Soundtrack

Dreamers by Nettson | https://soundcloud.com/nettson

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

Ambivert by | e s c p | https://escp-music.bandcamp.com

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Attribution 4.0 International (CC BY 4.0)

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/4.0/

If you are human, then chances are, you live more in your thoughts than objective reality. But we are not our thoughts and we often forget that. We don't realize how much our thoughts affect us but questioning these thoughts can be the path to more freedom in our creative process and in our lives.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Pile of Thoughts

I had pages and pages of thoughts

All the thoughts I could think of.

It was time to get them out of my head.

Once and for all.

All written down in front of me to see.

They all just sounded nothing like me.

They piled on, thought after thought.

A never ending stream of thoughts.

A train of thought, then another.

I couldn't remember boarding that train,

And yet, there I was, sitting by the window,

Listening to the clickety-clack of the tracks.

Once again, I ended up nowhere.

I ran out of paper, but never of thought.

I ran out of ink, I ran out of steam,

I ran out of time, but never of thought.

Hours wasted on a trip I never meant to take.

Days worn out by catastrophic scenarios

Months gone with the what ifs of tomorrow.

Years dissolved into irrational fears and regret.

And yet, the thoughts kept running wild.

I got tired of this race I could never win.

I sat down in the only seat I could find.

Right behind the mind.

Suddenly, I could see it all.

The piles and streams, the race, the trips,

The trains, the steam, the pain, the scenes.

None of it was me. None of it was mine.

-

Slow Motion, soon on Not Poetry (https://medium.com/not-poetry)

The thought of right or wrong choices stops us from making any choices at all, in life and the creative process. We can't get away from making choices, but we can choose to look at them differently.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab /  Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems:

Choices

I haven't stepped outside in days
Every step is a choice we make.
The path I take, the way I walk, away I walk.
I hope the next step will be better than my last.
In fiction, days like this don't usually exist.
Does fiction imitate life? Or life, fiction?

As the writer of my story,
It's hard to see the line in the sand,
Of my choices and chances.
In life, choices are right or wrong.
In fiction, choices are better or worse.
I'd rather live in fiction, with no days like this.
It's liberating to have no wrong to choose,
And no right to follow.

-

Soundtrack

Ride by Dirk Vega | https://soundcloud.com/dirkvega

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Attribution-NoDerivs 3.0 Unported (CC BY-ND 3.0)

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-nd/3.0/

Winter Sunrise by Peyton Ross | https://soundcloud.com/peyton-ross-edm

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US

Mass in motion. Building momentum and creating a process might be among the best ways to follow a creative path. The challenges and fears bound to creativity are many, but momentum can help us push forward beyond our resistance leading to our best work yet. But how can we build momentum? And how can we stop momentum when we are not going in the direction we want? Let's talk about it!

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Momentum

Mass in motion
When all goes downhill
Momentum is easy to see
The uphill is a battle, unless
There's enough speed.

Mass in motion.
What if I suddenly stop?
The moment is gone.
Would I remain still forever,
With no breeze in sight to move me?

A mess in motion.
I am never not in motion.
Even when I sit still, my mind spins.
What if the speed depends on me?
Uphill or down, it all begins with me.

A mess in motion.
One moment sets it off.
I'm more in control than I thought.
The momentum is mine to build.
The momentum is mine to break.

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Playground - Soon available at Not Poetry https://medium.com/not-poetry

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Soundtrack

Wasting Time by Sapajou & Yorgo H | https://soundcloud.com/sapajoubeats

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

Mondays by MusicbyAden | https://soundcloud.com/musicbyaden

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US

Let's talk about facing blank pages and feeling completely frozen. Whenever there's a creative thing we really want to do, why is it that we feel completely paralyzed, unable to inch forward while our minds work overtime? Or is it just me? Also, in this episode: overthinking, analysis paralysis, creative resistance and taking action.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram:@memento.mori.lab 

Twitter:@mementomorilab 

Poems

Snow

It’s snowing again.
I hate talking about the weather.
But everything is covered in snow,
What else is there to talk about?

I haven’t seen a green leaf in months
It’s all grey and white. Mostly white,
Just like my blank pages.
Everything is covered in white.

I could paint the white off the pages,
Scribble some ink or use colors I once knew.
But the outside would remain awfully white,
Blank, and frozen in time, just like my mind.

-

Freezing - Soon available onNot Poetry - Medium

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Soundtrack credits:

Urban Hip-Hop by MaxKoMusic | https://maxkomusic.com/

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US

LIFE CONTROL by Lesion X | https://soundcloud.com/lesionxbeats

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

In My Mind by Deoxys Beats | https://soundcloud.com/deoxysbeats1

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US

We keep running around these circles and we always end up right where we started. This episode talks about the vicious and virtuous cycles we can encounter in our creative process.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Circles

Running in circles and cycles
The stories rinse and repeat
On never ending steam

The novelty feels fresh
But, it's just a new shade
In the same shape.

The edge, if there, is hidden.
When found, it's too sharp
Better go around the circle
One more time.

-

Eternal cycles

Do we just live to die?
Anything in between is
Just the passage of time.
Would we really live,
If we didn't die?
The cycle seems cruel
Death comes too soon,
Sometimes.

But eternal sounds long.
Life is loud, death, silent
Eternal has one continuous sound.
The cycles begin
The cycles end.
Some cycles break.

Eternal remains a dot on a page.
Still, forever, untouched.
Would you be a dot, forever?
Spinning around cycles doesn't sound much better.

-

Songs

Lost Paradise by Purrple Cat | https://purrplecat.com

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 Unported

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by-sa/3.0/deed.en_US

Lo-Fi Fashion Chill Hip Hop | 2021 | by Alex-Productions | https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCx0_M61F81Nfb-BRXE-SeVA

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

Time (Instrumental) by RYYZN | https://soundcloud.com/ryyzn

Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com

Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License

https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

Worn out lives, weathered souls. We all have moments in our lives that we feel depleted, like all the energy we had, dissipated. The colors of the world don't shine as bright, and we feel spent. But, maybe there is something we can do about it. Something that might make our lives a little better, even if the world around us is crumbling down. Maybe.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram:@memento.mori.lab 

Twitter:@mementomorilab 

Poems

Weathered

The sun wasn't meant to burn,
It wasn't meant to scar, to stain,
To weather.
But, we fly too high and get too close.
Icarus and I, we fall everytime,
Our wings dissolve, dripping wax.
We forget all that we saw from up there,
Down here, I can see nothing past the fog.

I run to the water to find my reflection,
I am no longer bold and bright.
I am weathered.
Why get so close to the sun?
Why did I? It was never my design.
I let the chants change my direction,
When they learned I could fly.
I meant to reach the sky and the stars.
I shot for the moon hoping to land on tomorrow.

I cannot open my eyes anymore,
Not sure if it's the sharp brightness
Or pure exhaustion, burning closed.
Flying took all I had in me.

-

Weather Within - Available on the Medium publication Not Poetryhttps://medium.com/not-poetry

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Faithful Mission by Artificial.Music | https://soundcloud.com/artificial-music
Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com
Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

Faith by yoitrax | https://soundcloud.com/yoitrax
Music promoted by https://www.free-stock-music.com
Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported License
https://creativecommons.org/licenses/by/3.0/deed.en_US

Abstractions of time, we created to make sense of the fact that we are going to die. "They" say that the past is dead and the future unborn, so all we can worry about is the present. But how can we do that when we are consumed by imagined scenarios and past traumas? Memento Mori Lab does not have the answers, but we do have this episode to raise more questions and hear some poetry on that subject.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Past, present, future

Abstractions of time, segments of life,
The burden of living knowing we die.

Like a child's hand, dipped in old traumas,
The past sticks to our skin and does not let go.
We cling to what we know, our tales of time.
Memories woven together, the patchwork of time.

A mistake was made when we labeled today,
Today is not the present. It's mostly past and future.
The present is fireworks, bursting here and there
Moments we lose in thought when we look away.

The future is always ahead but never to reach.
It sits in front of our thoughts, untouchable
Like a mirage in the middle of the desert
Of the best and worst case scenarios.

Abstractions of life, segments of time,

The burden of living knowing we die.

-

Frames - Soon available on the Medium publication Not Poetry https://medium.com/not-poetry

Inner critics, self-saboteurs, censors, oppressors. We all have different names to these little voices in our heads that criticize our every move and keep us from doing the creative work we want to do. These voices are one of the main reasons we avoid focusing on our creativity. No one wants to hear the nasty things they have to say, so let's talk about how we can deal with them.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab https://instagram.com/memento.mori.lab?igshid=1wz55ueuk60at

Twitter: @mementomorilab https://twitter.com/mementomorilab

Poems

Whispers

Sometimes it's just a whisper
A faint doubt between thoughts
Before diving into blank pages
The pen stains the wordless paper

Until the murmur spreads like weeds
The voices grow louder, and I, smaller.
Nothing I do is good enough,
I am not enough. Mediocre, at best.

Even if you tell me otherwise,
They say some people are just too nice.
I hear nothing else outside my mind
The space between lines was better off barren.

-

Silence

I thought I'd discover the silence
Underneath deafening punk rock,
Ringing phones, talking people,
Clashing pans, and washing machines.
When it all died down. The house went quiet.

It was time to meet silence,
Maybe I'd finally hear my voice.
Or hear nothing besides my breath.
But my mind flooded the rooms
With screaming voices that weren't mine.

-

Voices

I hear them loud and clear
No matter how noisy life gets.
I hear them quietly screaming at me.
Like the Phantom of the Opera, inside my mind.
Will they ever have anything nice to say?
Or neutral? I'd go for neutral.
But all they do is belittle me, for my own good.
They tell me how pathetic I am, how pitiful.
And dumb, and lost and useless.
What good is that anyway?
How's that meant to help exactly?
Thanks for sharing, you’ve said enough.

-

Let’s talk about fear of failure, fear of rejection, fear of success, fear of not being good enough and all these other invisible monsters that haunt our creative minds. If anything, this episode will make you feel less alone when it comes to dealing with these quiet fears we fail to see.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab

Mentioned in the episode

Fear Setting 👉Ted Talk 

Poems

Fears

Fears wrap around ideas,
Covering my senses,
Breath between tears
My body shakes, rigid,
I try to fight, pen in hand,
No victory in sight, blank.

Fears stop time, racing,
Bathe in silence, screaming
Stillness, rejoices in failure
I, trapped in my prison
Built as my protection,
Remain afraid, quiet, blank.

-

Invisible monsters

I'm shaking, nervous, wired with nothing to fear.
My stomach in knots, too tight, killing butterflies,
Why isn't the air reaching my lungs anymore?
My chest is moving, diaphragm working, but no oxygen.
I see no imminent threat in sight, but my throat is dry,
My jaw clenched, my eyes stretched open in the dark.

Invisible monsters hold back my steps, holding my hands.
I was frozen long before winter, alive but weathered
By potential failure, success, or any outcome in between.
My body, stone cold, ready to flight, but never to fight.
It's all an overprotection, an overcorrection taken too far.
My mind ended up caged, while monsters run free.

-

Stumble - Soon on Not Poetry (Medium Publication)

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Bonus: Screaming Fears - Soon on Not Poetry (Medium Publication)

Let's talk about our chaotic lives, how we invite more chaos in and how we have absolutely no control over most things. It's hard to accept how little we can actually control in life, and maybe this episode is a bit extreme. Or maybe it's accurate. Who knows?

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Chaos & Control

Shattered, crushed, under control
Arranged pieces lie still on the floor,
Flat, lifeless, but lethal.
Sharp bits of chaos beneath my steps
My feet stand on glass, but I'm breathing
Inhale and exhale, as if nothing is broken.

Scattered edges cut invisible strings
I bleed from my ego, out of control.
I feel the shards of pain pulse in my veins
A million pieces of chaos, untamed
Inhale and exhale, as if nothing changed.

-

Look around

I look around, searching for more
But every room is a reflection of myself
With piles of dust and sorrow
Each one, abandoned and full.

Filled with scrambled words that never come
Fragments of thought that don’t add up
I find no peace with my eyes closed
I see nothing but chaos once they open

The tears run clear lines down my cheeks,
And stain my thoughts and the list in my hand
Waiting to be done, never to be finished
I wake up to another day, to the same wait.

-

Mess

The house is a mess
My hopes are everywhere
Cans, notes and crumpled paper
Cover my steps on the ground

I looked for answers
Only to find more questions
The more I search the less I find
Promises faded into past

The trajectory, sturdy and strong
Until I went off the rails,
How can I get back on the horse
All mixed metaphors, blurred finish lines

Am I the mess inside this house?

Brief obsessions come and on. All of a sudden, we get interested in something. The interest escalates quickly and becomes an obsession. We consume everything we can find about it, we learn, we try, and we feel like our lives have a new meaning. Until, just as suddenly, we don't. Sound familiar?

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram:@memento.mori.lab 

Twitter:@mementomorilab 

Poems

Brief obsessions

The obsession hits me,

Without warning.

I watch all there is to watch

I read, well, skim through

All there is to read.

I know it all. I learn it all.

I crave more and I know nothing.

I turn the page and see,

This is only chapter one.

I barely scratched the surface

But, I'm already exhausted.

And my obsession deflates, slowly,

Suffocated by smoke without fire

Dead flames without ashes.

I take a break to breathe in clarity

But I know that any exit I take

Becomes my next, brief, obsession.

Why do I even question my next move

Or hope for anything to stay?

-

Finite & This is it: Soon available on Not Poetry, Medium Publication

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab

Twitter: @mementomorilab

The expectation of a constant stream of happiness, creativity, or anything we crave is the recipe for disappointment. What if all comes in waves instead? Maybe we need to look at things differently, zoom in and out of our lives, and search for progress to find happiness.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Waves

I am water,
Wave and ocean.
My mind, the tide
Ebbs and flows
Rises and falls
Fights and fails.
It's misery and bliss.

Waves crash against the rocks,
Waves spread gently ashore.
They push, they pull.

The rush against the clock
Follows the collapse on the floor.
I push, I pull.

The water in the ocean,
The blood in my veins,
Pulse, together, in sync,

Every beat creates a wave.

-

Something changed- Available on Not Poetry, Medium Publication

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Mountain

I stoop on top of the mountain, catching my breath.
"I made it" was my first thought.
Naive, I thought this peak would let me hop onto the next, without ever coming down.
Then I saw the distance between the mountains left to climb
And all the valleys I'd face in between.

The world tricked me, I thought linear was a thing,
Linear progress and linear narratives.
Now I see that life comes in crooked lines.

We are ups and downs, ebbs and flows.
Our path is not a single, straight line in a chart.
All our narratives are lost in perception,
Written lines of fiction and surprising twists,
We knew were coming all along.

Lost, looking for linear lines
I saw starker dips and unstable peaks,
No joy to be found in any step of the way.

-

Pace- Soon available on Not Poetry, Medium Publication

If a tree falls in a forest and no one is around to hear it, does it make a sound?

Most of us feel invisible, most of the time. Do we need to be seen to exist? What about our creative work? Does it exist without an audience? As always, an episode full of questions and with very few answers.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Invisible

No matter where I sit,
Or where I stand,
Whether I stay or go.

No matter what I do,
Or what I don't do,
I'm not sure I'm here.

Nothing reassures me I am.
All that is me goes unseen.
Invisible in plain sight.
Hidden before your eyes.

In the middle of the square,
Mid-day, all bright, I wear black.
Do you see me yet?

The sunshine knows I’m there,
It coats my face, blinds my eyes and
Makes my hair look lighter than it is.

Maybe it sees me, and I’m here, after all.
Or maybe the sun just shines as bright as it can,
Not choosing where its light lands.

I would ask the sun,
But I doubt it would hear my voice.
Am I not really here at all?

-

Poem: Inside - Soon available on https://medium.com/not-poetry

-

Poem: Island

I’m still here
Forgotten or not
On top of this island
The waves did not take me
The wind was not strong enough
Somehow, I’m still standing tall
All alone, I wait to be seen
Feet buried in ashes
Stuck to the past
But still here.

-

Copyright ®Mayra Gomes 2020/ Memento Mori Lab

"I wish I had done BLANK when I had the chance” Sounds familiar? Regret seems to be a common feeling going around, particularly the regrets of things we didn’t do. It’s so painful and yet, we feel completely powerless over it. If we can’t go back in time, then what can we do?

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

A Collection of Regrets

The gallery opens. Inside: dark walls and spotlights
Displays arranged next to one another, all empty,
And yet, one heavier than the next.

Sharp turn to a room filled with crumpled papers and dreams,
Dead before reaching the stars or even the walls.
An entire exhibition of what could have been, but never will.

Conceptual art of the soul, equally hard to understand,
Or accepted as art at all. It's not a pipe, but it is. Or a fountain.
No, this is the largest collection of all.

The collection of regrets gathered from every person looking back,
wondering why they didn't take a chance.
Why did they let fear win?

Except this art won't go for millions in the next auction.
These pieces will remain untouched, gathering dust,
And painfully poking you every chance they have.

Some, I'm afraid, couldn't fit in this gallery,
But they still live in the back of our minds,
Weighing us down at every chance they get.

-

Torture

Regrets drip in the back of my mind,
All the time, like a broken faucet
No matter how tightly I turn,
It keeps on leaking just the same.

I try my hardest to avoid it. I do, but,
The sound of each drop grows louder,
Until I can hear nothing else, it's torture.
Meanwhile, no one else hears anything at all.

-

The water - Soon to be published on the Medium Publication - Not Poetry.

Simple is far from easy. In a world that keeps complicating things, how can we use simplicity to improve our creative processes and our lives? We are complex creatures, but if you consciously simplify things, we might surprise ourselves and create even better work. Best of all, simplicity can help us find more joy along the way. Come, join this experiment!

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

🔥Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts! 👉https://anchor.fm/mementomorilab

Follow me on Instagram for more poetry, thoughts and non-sense art: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Simple Days

If only every day could be this simple.

Some days might surprise us,
If we let them breathe a little.
We can try to escape routine
And fall flat in the unknown,
Unless we breathe a little.

Some days carry too many promises.
No one can live to such expectations.
Now and then, things take a wrong turn,
That's when we forget to breathe too,
Breathe through our lack of control.

Until we stumble on simple days like these
Hopefully, next to someone we love,
Or at least in peace with ourselves,
Right in the middle of chaotic modern lives,
Days that help us sleep better at night.

-

Thoughts bounce

Thoughts bounce back and forth

Off the walls, in and out of focus.

Escaping my grasp, escalating,

What once was one is many

Unrealistic improbabilities evolve

Like shadows grow by proximity to light

Though the light was never on,

I failed to find the off switch.

-

At night

Soft lights evade the curtains,

Landing on the plain white wall.

A few shadows dance to the wind,

But the night is quiet.

My head lies heavy on the pillow in the dark.

The covers wrap my body awake,

Too warm, too cold, no in-between.

My eyes fight for one last look at the beam of light.

Memories play a huge role in how we see ourselves and how we tackle our creative process. But is the past truly set in stone as they say? Maybe not. This episode is not a trip down memory lane. It’s all about the questions that emerge when we think about all the things we remember and the ones we forgot. And why is it that certain smells can take you right back to your childhood?

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

Memories

If memory serves me...well, it doesn't.
Memories, myths, legends, all cut from the same cloth.

Stories told over and over become independent,
Standing on their own two feet, no longer attached to facts.

They never were factual.
An event takes place in front of hundreds of spectators.
A thousand different stories emerge.

We might look at the same thing, but we don't see the same thing.
Bound by our perceptions and points of view, each observer witnesses a different story.

Over time stories are molded, sculpted, and repeated until the memory fades away.
All we are left with are stories.

Memories come in flashes, blurry, and incoherent.
Pieces of a puzzle, forever incomplete.

Suddenly, we remember a smell, a song, a voice, a movement, a moment.
It's hard to pin it down, but it's there, somewhere within ourselves.
Then, come the stories, patching things together until it all makes sense.

-

Not Worthy of Remembrance

My mind plays tricks on me
Melting memories together
In the molds of my plots

Developed over the years,
These narratives of delusion
Mend my shattered recollections

My mind deemed most of my life
not worthy of remembrance
Except for some scars and tears

I remember the stories,
Told a million times,
But not the moments.
Those vanished forever.

Then, a scent fills the air
And a song plays on the radio
All that I felt comes back to me,
As if I'd never left that moment to begin with.

-

Bright Pink Popcorn - Published on Medium “Not Poetry” 

Some days, it just feels like we are not really in it, we get stuck, and inspiration doesn't come anywhere near our creative work. This was one of those days! It's hard to accept that we can't live in a state of constant flow, creating one "masterpiece" after the other, isn't it? Maybe this episode has the solution, or, at least, it will make you feel less alone whenever you feel stuck.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab

Twitter: @mementomorilab

Poems

Tailoring Thoughts

Tangled between past and future
Thoughts thread outside the lines

Stuck on misplaced triggers
Torn by constant repetition
Tied to all my insecurities

These lines wrap around my limbs
My pen won’t move, the paper blank

I face the stitches, I find no meaning
One knot undone creates ten more
The needle inches closer to the edge,
Closer to its end.

I tied all my thoughts, I tore’em apart
I stock them, stuck and tangled.

Who is the part of me that keeps watching it happen?
How come I’m the tailor, spectator, needle and fabric?

-

Second poem: Thoughts (available on Medium)

Facing our own mortality, figuratively speaking, can be a catalyst to finding happiness in being alive. This episode is about our own deaths and how they can put everything else into perspective. If you don't want to think about any of this right now or ever, it's better to skip this one. Otherwise, if you want to hear some poems about our mortality and some things to consider on the subject, join Mayra in this thought-provoking episode.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram:@memento.mori.lab 

Twitter:@mementomorilab 

Poems

Never to Now

The pendulum swings from now to never
Death stands by, imminent and distant
The pendulum swings from never to now
I'm fragile and invincible, afraid and immortal.

My days are numbered but not written
The calendar sweeps through dates
Eager to find finish lines and sharp turns
Death comes too soon and not fast enough

Missteps remind me of Death's breath,
Cold and near, hitting the back of my neck
I swear she's always lurking, waiting
For the pendulum to swing one last time.

Who am I? Who are we? Does the mirror reflect who we really are? This is an episode full of questions. We constantly search for ourselves, and, simultaneously, we hide our true selves from the rest of the world afraid of being judged for being different.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

The mirror

Held up high and from afar, a fogged mirror reflects me.
Will my reflection ever be clear?
No one around to see all my angles and doubts.
The blurred, blinded eyes can't see past assumptions.
The mirror bears expectations, stories, deceptions.
But no reality, I'm afraid.

A closer look reveals nothing but perceptions.
A change in angle opens paper-thin perspectives.
A living, looking glass of imagined non-fiction narratives.
Not to be seen are the images others search in me.
Is this a broken mirror if the reality reflected is never accurate?
The pieces tightly placed together by unfounded beliefs
Show me nothing but flaws, fears, wishes, and ideas,
Mistakes and corrections, ideals, and imperfections.

I got so many questions to ask my reflection,
This isn't Snow White. I stand in front of myself unanswered.
Until the mirror cracks.
The beliefs reflected crumble under query
And the shards of glass end up scattered across the floor.
Shattered reflections - still, no reality anywhere near.

I'm the only one left to clean up the mess
Of my fragmented past cracking under my feet.
Fabricated, its edges can still cut my flesh
Sharpened throughout years of delusion,
How can I avoid bleeding into awakening?

-

Why do we do what we do?

Why do you choose the beliefs you choose?
Why do you chase the way you do?
Why sleep the way you sleep?
Why speak the way you speak?

Why do we weigh the bodies we weigh?
Why do we worship the way we do?
Why feel the way we feel?
Why fear the way we fear?

Why do they think the thoughts they think?
Why do they thrash the way they do?
Why hate the way they hate?
Why help the way they help?

Why do I loathe the feelings I loathe?
Why do I love the way I do?
Why disguise the way I disguise?
Why dismiss the way I dismiss?

When did you learn to judge?
When did we learn to dread?
When did they learn to fight?
When did I learn to hide?

What is it that you see?
Without the lenses of your convictions.
Why do you see what you see?
Why don't you see everything else?

Take off the layers of learned beliefs,
Forget all fabricated assumptions
And look far beyond the mirror.
What is it that you see?

-

Poem: Herself

Is time the evil monster that keeps us from doing what we want? Are you haunted by time every time the clock ticks? This episode is all about time! Along with three poems, Mayra discusses (with herself) the struggles imposed by our obsession with time, how evil time can be and how it might be the only force actually moving us forward.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems:

On Time

Time goes fast and slow.
It flies. It drags. It tells. It takes.
It never stops.

Its measure? Pressure.

The alarm, the clock, the countdown, the calendar.
The birthdays, the holidays, the seasons.
The happy new years, the dates, the five-year plans.
The beginnings, the goals, the graduations, the wrinkles, the ends.
The joys, the pains, the expiration dates. Our expiration dates.

Time's a gift and a curse.
It's wasted. It's sacred. It's money.
It never stops.

Its measure? Pressure.

We count the seconds, the minutes, the hours.
The days, the weeks, the moons, and months.
The seasons, the years, the decades.
The centuries, the eras, the past.
It all means nothing.
Stop counting - it goes on just the same.

Regardless of our last breath
Mindless of our regrets
It never stops.

Dismissive of our plans
Oblivious to our existence
It never stops.

But when our time comes,
It, suddenly, ends and goes on just the same.

-

This is me trying

7 am, my alarm goes off. It's Monday.
Or Thursday. Work is a few steps away
But it never felt further apart.
I question if it's worth the pain. Or the poem.
I drag my feet across the hall, socks on.
Sit in front of the computer, right on time.
I watch the clock tire itself out, carefully ticking,
Showing me how well it can tick and tock.
Taking longer each minute to find the next
Dreading the seconds between hours
Waiting for the arrival of 5 pm,
When I no longer care about its job.

-

Obs. There was one more poem, but I couldn't fit here. It will be published soon on Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Making decisions can be such a struggle, not only within creativity but life in general. This episode brings up some of those feelings and talks about how not deciding can have a huge impact on our lives. And there are a few ideas on trying to be more decisive!

Obs: Sorry about the weird interference sounds during this episode, those are not an artistic choice, but they could be.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab https://instagram.com/memento.mori.lab?igshid=1wz55ueuk60at

Twitter: @mementomorilab https://twitter.com/mementomorilab

Poem:

Without a map

She stood at yet another intersection

Surrounded by questions wherever she looked.

Signs, options, choices, decisions all around.

Her white, untied shoelaces melted into pavement

The light skipped from green to red, red to green,

Unsure of her next step, she took none.

Left, right, no end in sight. Straight ahead?

She thought about turning back, green to red.

The road most traveled or the less taken?

Scared of getting lost, without a map of what's next,

She failed to see her standing stillness,

Was already her chosen path.

This episode is a deep dive into perfectionism, what it is all about, and some things we can try instead. There are some perfect poems throughout the episode, and we take a look at how perfectionism might be destroying our dreams.

If you struggle with perfectionism, this podcast might NOT be the solution, but it will show you that you are not alone, and maybe we can't overcome it together. At the very least, we can try!

Here is the video I mentioned: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5EuWCFCgy58&t=14s

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts, and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab

Twitter: @mementomorilab

POEMS:

Perfect

Is perfect a perfect word?
If I say perfect enough times,
Do I take away its power?
And if I never say it again,
Will it be something greater?

Maybe, if I rearrange the letters,
It might read better, roll off the tongue.
Like paradox, or marmalade, perfect.
How about preceft? Or trepfec?
That is absolutely ferpect.

What if I remove some letters?
Or add new ones, instead.
An L is always nice here and there.
Maybe I should add in a Q,
To make it sound more unique.

Wait! Put in a W for some wompf.
Werfect, perfect. I don't know,
It seems to be missing something.
It's not perfect just yet.

I'll have to come back to this later,
With fresh eyes, you know?

-

How Many?

How many words were lost in chasing perfection?
How many books not published, how many stories not told?
How many songs silenced? How many voices unheard?

How many paintings painted over and over until the thickness of paint was too heavy for the canvas to bear?

How many projects were abandoned before their beginnings?
How many sketches erased, how many photos not taken?
How many movies forgotten? How many poems torn?

How many lives lived quietly, locked in the cage of perfection, imagining one day they would create one perfect pebble?

-

Empire

An empire built on all imperfect things,
The most beautiful empire there is.
Invaluable items you failed to see.
Perfection has claimed all as its own,
The torn pages and tossed papers.
Piles and piles of your mistakes.
This is perfection's paradise, you're not welcome.

So, it leads you on a wild hunt with no end in sight,
And you hold on to scraps of potential perfection,
Hoping they'd amount to more than worthless pebbles.

An episode about the inner truths of an artist, the concept of truth, opinions and dealing with negative feedback. Through the episode there are a few poem readings, a confession and some philosophy from someone who knows nothing about Nietzsche.

Our creative minds get caught in rules disguised as truths and we end up hindering our creative process. Not only that, but we also tend to create our work thinking about everyone else's opinion and our own criticism, which ultimately just cuts our creativity short. Instead, the first stages of our creative work should be free of any concerns or misconceptions to really push the boundaries of your art.

Check out this episode and join Mayra on this trip!

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and anywhere you get your podcasts!

Instagram: @memento.mori.lab 

Twitter: @mementomorilab 

Poems

The truth about the truth

The truth

deceives us most of the time

treads lines, dots and questions marks

creates history in cornered perspectives

shapes its faces and forms to point of view.

shifts from eye to eye, from mind to mind.

We will never know if we

hear the same songs

taste the same spices

see the same hues

feel the same aches

touch the same satins

The truth is another fairy tale we were told to sleep at night.

-

Breaking truth

Dancing between mirrors,

Gently tracing my reflections,

The truth bends pieces of glass,

Shattered illusions for all.

-

Apples

She walked around the square,

Biting into her apple as I bit mine.

Did we taste the same fruit?

She'd say hers was green.

I would say mine was too.

Did we see the same hues?

Leaves cracked under her feet,

The apples between our teeth.

Did we hear the same sounds?

Her eyes landed on mine.

She looked just like me.

Did we think the same thought?

She went left.

I went the other way.

Overwhelming ideas -This episode starts with a poem called Russian Dolls. At some point in our creative process come the ideas. But sometimes there are too many ideas, and that can make us freeze. Other times we struggle to take an idea all the way to the end and feel the need to move on to the next thing and the next and the next.

Do you find yourself overwhelmed by a bunch of ideas? Well, this podcast does NOT have the solution, but you'll feel less alone in that struggle. And I have some ideas on how we can deal with all our ideas.

What's Memento Mori Lab?

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Instagram: @memento.mori.labhttps://instagram.com/memento.mori.lab?igshid=1wz55ueuk60at

Twitter: @mementomorilabhttps://twitter.com/mementomorilab

The poem: Russian Dolls

At first, I had one. Then another, then another.
They all just came to me at different times.
Naive, I held onto them, as tightly as I could,
Squashing them against my chest, all mine.
Over time, a few disappeared, some fell apart,
And others had nothing inside.

They had glossy smiles and bright curves,
I could barely look away, while my haunted mind,
Wondered, could they all be as beautiful inside?
How many dolls were there? Were they hollow?
Would the last, tiny one, be mesmerizing or?

My hands were to busy holding them together,
Close to me and closed for the world not to see.
What if I dropped them or opened an empty one?
Maybe, they were no good to me, not like this.

I had to take the time, twist one open, look inside.
The red one, squeaked as I turned, goosebumps.
And I saw another one within, refined.

It took longer than expected, I struggled,
I still had to dust all others from time to time.

But the smallest one was a speck of gold.

By @mayragomes_8 at @memento.mori.lab

Expectations - This episode starts with a little poem called Expectations, and then we dive a little deeper into this topic and how it affects our creative process. Expectations are one of the many ways fear shows up and gets in the way of our creativity. I feel that in my writing, doodling, or anytime I'm trying to bring ideas to life. At times I freeze and just toss the project aside because I know it won't match the idea in my mind. Other times, I follow through, but still, the result is a disappointment. And that's all because we create unrealistic expectations and let fear take over. Maybe, just bringing this to light might soften the impact it has on our creativity. Being aware of something is half the battle.

Here are the links to a couple of things mentioned in this episode:

Memento Mori Lab is our permission slip to experiment, try new things, and keep bringing ideas to life. In my case, that means writing mediocre poetry, some stories and scripts, doodling, and recording this podcast. Memento Mori reminds us, we are going to die. Whatever creative endeavor you've been postponing, now is the time to take action.

Instagram:@memento.mori.lab 

Twitter:@mementomorilab 

The poem: Expectations

Expectations fester inside, growing
Stronger every day, suffocating me.
Unachievable illusions, we see
What could be but never will.
Built with what we cannot touch,
The floor's far from steady
But the barriers feel so sturdy.

I try to keep my pace, and my peace,
As the invisible voice whispers,
"Why bother doing anything at all?
Nothing will ever live up to our vision."
A line from Fear's playbook,
page 12, unrealistic expectations.

At every unexpected turn, I see
Another crack on the floor,
Until all the walls, columns and hopes crumble.
Pieces of disappointment everywhere,
Fear's favorite collection of trophies.
If only I'd stepped into the present instead.

By@mayragomes_8  

A poem on creativity, time and death, followed by some context and a call to all creative souls desperate to finally start making things!

Creating time

We can do anything,
We can do everything,
We can do nothing.
Though nothing usually is still something.
We take time for granted,
clocks melt between our fingers.
All my desires and dreams fell behind,
Drought of time.

We're always out of time.
But time is always there.
When committed or truly needed,
We seem to find some seconds between hours,
And extend hours with extra minutes.

What if we could commit for 30 days?
Commit to our dying dreams and desperate desires.
Yes, 30 days, like refund policies and online challenges.
30 days of making time to create.
A journey of exploring thoughts, words, and feelings.
A creative journey with no final destination,
No end goal in sight - to the horror of modern gurus.

Memento Mori reminds us: we must die. We are going to die.

An uneasiness comes at the mention of Death,
But before sadness settles in the face of our inevitable fate,
And before we search inspirational quotes to numb our pain,
Consider this might be all the inspiration we need.
Isn't mortality motivation enough to move us forward,
Face our fears and dare to create?

We can do anything,
We can do everything,
We can do nothing.
Finite time, a gift in disguise,
Whispers with every tick of the melting clock:

Start now, create now, live now.

Tick tock.

-/-

For daily posts and poetry from Memento Mori Lab, check out our Instagram @memento.mori.lab