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Far too many couples are just surviving their marriage when it was meant to thrive. This is the place for practical tips on how to build an awesome marriage. Our passion is to help you strengthen your marriage. Dr. Kim Kimberling hosts the show. Dr. Kim is the President of Awesome Marriage, has been married for 53 years, and has been a professional counselor for 40 years. He is the author of 7 Secrets to An Awesome Marriage and 14 Keys To Lasting Love. Dr. Kim is joined by co-host Lindsay Few, Content Director for Awesome Marriage. She has been married for 20 years. Her husband is a church planter, and they love ministering to married couples together. Tune in each week to hear practical ways on how to have an awesome marriage! This podcast is brought to you by the ministry of Awesome Marriage.
- 783 - Answering Porn Recovery FAQ: Betrayed Spouse | Ep. 652
Today we’re answering listener questions about how to handle the pain of a spouse’s porn use.
Unfortunately, this is a pretty common issue we hear about from couples, but the good news is that you CAN heal and move forward. So today we’re answering listener questions about healing and recovery from pornography in marriage. We’ll talk about the process for forgiveness, what to do if you just cannot forgive and move on, how to rebuild trust, and practical strategies to combat intrusive thoughts.
Listen for practical ways to heal and recover your heart and your marriage. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How to forgive and move forward when it feels impossible
Changing your view if you can’t separate your spouse from the hurtful behavior
The balance of feeling safe and willingness to be vulnerable
Boundary setting to allow for healing
Getting out of the comparison trap and starting to feel beautiful and desirable again
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: When your marriage is recovering from porn use, repentance is the first step. Forgiveness allows you to heal, and boundaries help facilitate marriage healing. You can rebuild your marriage even better than before.
Questions to Discuss:
What does your spouse do that helps you trust them?
Are there any areas where you need to build or repair trust with your spouse?
What can you do together to help that process?
QUOTES
“Until you forgive, you’re still giving a lot of power to what happened.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“One of the best prayers is asking God to help you see your spouse through His eyes.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We want assurance that nothing will ever hurt us again, but that’s not possible.” Lindsay Few
“Look for Jesus in your spouse. When you see that, things are probably going to be pretty good.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
This is not a hurdle to get through: this is a lifestyle change. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
There’s nothing wrong with being accountable, not because you ‘have to,’ but because you love your spouse. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You’ve got to be completely open and transparent with each other. You can’t have trust without that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Sign up for the Free 5 Steps to Healing After Porn Betrayal to learn the steps you need to take to live a marriage undefiled and experience closeness and intimacy again
Past podcast episodes on healing your marriage after porn:
How to Regain Trust With Your Spouse After Porn | Ep. 561
How to Rebuild Intimacy With Your Spouse After Porn | Ep. 562
Has your marriage been damaged by the effects of porn? Not sure what’s next? Download the 8 Steps To Heal Your Marriage After Porn to learn your next steps to healing.
Tue, 19 Nov 2024 - 45min - 782 - Equip Your Kids to Fight Porn with Kristen Jenson | Ep. 651
Are your kids protected from p*rn? Do they know how to fight back? What if they’ve already been exposed to it?
So many parents do not know how to protect their kids from porn, or how to equip them with what to do if they are exposed to it. We are so pleased to hear from Kristen Jenson today on the podcast with the answers to your questions. Equip yourself so that you can equip kids well.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The hidden mental health dangers of p*rn
The scripts parents need to discuss p*rn with their kids’
Tips for digital safety in today's technology-driven world.
When should you start talking to your kids about p*rn?
Which phones are safer for kids?
Resources that will help you guide your kids or grandchildren
The need for open conversations that can protect children's innocence.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Your kids & grandkids need a plan in place to protect them from the danger of porn exposure and addiction. Today’s episode will equip you to make that plan.
Questions to Discuss:
Have you taken the time to equip your kids with what to do if they are exposed to porn?
Do you have a plan to resist the temptation of porn or explicit materials?
If not, use the resources below to develop a plan today.
QUOTES
“If you’re worried about what to do with your kids about p*rn, this podcast is for you.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“P*rnography is fueling a huge rise in child-on-child harmful sexual behavior.” - Kristen Jenson
“How do you talk to kids about it in a way that doesn’t scare them, doesn’t scare the parents and gives them a real plan?” - Kristen Jenson
“We all need scripts for certain life situations. There are no scripts passed down for this problem.” - Kristen Jenson
“We live in a world awash with addiction. We need to teach our kids how to protect their brains from addiction.” - Kristen Jenson
“P*rnography is the tool of choice. If kids know what to do, they’re going to be that much safer.” - Kristen Jenson
“We have an opportunity to say, no this isn’t normal. No, this isn’t healthy.” - Kristen Jenson
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Purchase Kristen’s books: Good Pictures Bad Pictures: Porn-Proofing Today's Young Kids, Good Pictures Bad Pictures Jr., and the Guidebook for Counseling Kids
Learn about our the brand new curriculum Brain Defense: Digital Safety
Keep current with empowering articles From Defend Young Minds
Use the instantly-downloadable guides to help you teach your child
Follow Defend Young Minds on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, & LinkedIn
Fri, 15 Nov 2024 - 1h 06min - 781 - Answering Porn Recovery FAQ: Recovering Spouse | Ep. 650
If porn has damaged your marriage, healing is possible. And you are not alone…This is unfortunately a common issue we hear from couples about. So today on the podcast, we’re answering listener questions about healing and recovery from pornography in marriage. We’ll talk about the need for forgiveness, what to do when a spouse cannot forgive and move on, how to rebuild trust, and practical strategies to combat temptation.
Listen for practical ways to engage in healing and recovery for you and your marriage. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What to do if a spouse can’t forgive past porn use
How to make a plan for dealing with temptation.
Necessary steps in the trust-rebuilding process
Help to understand the impact on a wife’s self-image
How shame and isolation impact recovery
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Porn use can really damage the trust in marriage, but recovery is possible. Learn how and do what it takes to rebuild trust and does not
Questions to Discuss:
What are the areas of vulnerability in your marriage?
How can you make a plan to protect your marriage where you need it most?
Is there anything you need to come clean about with your spouse? Do it today.
QUOTES
“The things a spouse needs to do for recovery are good for them AND good for the marriage. It really works together.” Lindsay Few
“Most men I talk to have no idea how devastating their p*rn use was for their wife.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It’s so important to have a plan in place.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Remember that temptation itself is not sin. It’s what you do once you are tempted.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You can use temptation as a red flag to drive you toward things that are good for you.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“God doesn’t want us stuck in shame, but the enemy sure does.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Podcast episode:
We mentioned this episode with Matt Cline
Other helpful episodes: How to Regain Trust With Your Spouse After Porn | Ep. 561
How to Rebuild Intimacy With Your Spouse After Porn | Ep. 562
Sign up for the Free 5 Steps to Healing After Porn Betrayal to learn the steps you need to take to live a marriage undefiled and experience closeness and intimacy againTue, 12 Nov 2024 - 42min - 780 - Emotional Intimacy Do's and Don'ts | Ep. 649
How is the emotional intimacy in your marriage? Do you feel safe telling your spouse anything? Do you feel loved, heard, and understood?
Marriage is meant to be a refuge…a place where you each feel safe sharing deep personal feelings and confident you will be graciously received by your spouse. The problem is that many of us don’t talk about or even understand our own emotions. And if we can’t properly process our emotions, it will be very hard to build true emotional closeness in marriage.
Tune in today to learn the Do’s and Don’t of emotional intimacy. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Surprising behaviors that may shut our spouses down emotionally
What wives tend to get wrong about emotional intimacy
What husbands often get wrong about emotional intimacy
What we miss out on when emotional intimacy is missing in marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Emotional intimacy is being able to share your thoughts, feelings, hopes, fears, and more with your spouse and be loved and accepted. It is a building block of great connection in marriage.
Questions to Discuss:
How safe do you feel sharing anything you need to with your spouse?
What could you do to better accept your spouse as they are?
What helps you feel emotionally close and connected?
QUOTES
Wives may experience more of the feeling of the lack of emotional intimacy. - Lindsay Few
I promise you, after 54 years of marriage, that your spouse cannot read your mind. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
A lot of times we think our spouse thinks like we think. Dr. Kim Kimberling
Our assumptions really get us in trouble. - Lindsay Few
Instead of thinking your spouse is a terrible person, realize they’re just different. They don’t see things the same way you do. - Lindsay Few
God didn’t give feelings and emotions to women that He didn’t give to men. He gave us the same feelings and emotions. It changes your life when you get in touch with that. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
We’re all emotional. We’re just not all in touch with them. - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Take the 5 Days to Deeper Emotional Intimacy challenge to learn practical steps to growing emotional intimacy with your spouse.
FREE Awesome Marriage Feelings Chart PrintableFREE Married couples card game Heart-to-Heart is a game designed to deepen emotional intimacy and connection between you two.
Tue, 05 Nov 2024 - 36min - 779 - Building a Foundation of Spiritual Intimacy for a Marriage That Lasts with David & Meg Robbins | Ep. 648
We’re so happy to have David and Meg Robbins from FamilyLife joining us on the podcast today. The Robbins have been in ministry for many years and have learned so many important truths about what it takes to create a marriage strong enough to stand strong through the years.
Today they share their wisdom and experience. You don’t want to miss this conversation, full of wisdom and practical application that will benefit you and your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The unique strengths of Gen Z when it comes to pursuing marriage
The 3 threats every marriage faces
The power of the Holy Spirit to stand strong
Daily habits to fight the drift that busyness creates in marriage
Scheduling habits to keep your marriage connected
How to find an encouraging community of support - and why it matters
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Don’t neglect the health of your marriage: Keep short accounts when things need to be addressed between you, and cultivate supportive community.
Questions to Discuss:
Are you aware of the spiritual battle for your marriage?
Are there any ways you’re viewing your spouse as your enemy, and neglecting to protect your mind and heart against the real enemy?
Where would your life and marriage benefit from community? What step can you take today to nurture your friendships, mentorship and fellowship?
QUOTES
Younger generations are doing a lot of deep story work. - Meg Robbins
We all have ingrained sin patterns that we bring into marriage. - David Robbins
Vulnerability does involve risk. It’s not status quo. Yet vulnerability is the pathway to deeper intimacy. - David Robbins
You have to take risky steps to take down the walls around your heart. - Meg Robbins
With little things, we can be hard on ourselves. But when you spend time with other people, you realize these are normal things. - Meg Robbins
Most people want to talk about their marriage, it just requires someone else to start the conversation. Anyone of us can crack open the conversation. - David Robbins
A healthy marriage is one that’s repenting often. - David Robbins
No marriage is going to naturally drift towards awesome oneness. - Meg Robbins
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find marriage-building resources and events at www.FamilyLife.com
Find and follow FamilyLife on YouTube
Utilize FamilyLife’s The Art of Marriage small group course
Nurture your marriage with our FREE 15 Better Assumptions to Make About Your Spouse printable.
Tue, 29 Oct 2024 - 58min - 778 - Using the 5 Levels of Communication & Avoiding Communication Breakdowns | Ep. 647
Are you familiar with the 5 levels of communication and where they fit in your marriage? Do you use all 5 levels in your marriage? The basics of communication sound simple on paper, yet most couples are struggling to communicate effectively. And when communication falls short, your connection suffers, conflict ramps up, and marriage isn’t the partnership you hoped for.
Today Dr. Kim shares these levels and how to use them, so you can access all 5 types of communication your marriage needs and avoid common communication breakdowns with your spouse. Tune in to learn more!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
5 communication levels you and your spouse need
Simple tips for avoiding common communication breakdowns
Getting to deep communication with a less talkative spouse
Common mistakes husbands and wives make with deeper communication
How to respect your spouse’s personal communication style
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: When you talk, be mindful of communicating in ways that your spouse will be able to really hear you. When your spouse talks, listen well, and don’t neglect any of the 5 communication levels.
Questions to Discuss:
Which levels of communication come more naturally in your marriage?
Which levels are harder to use?
What is one thing you can do today to make sure you communicate in a way your spouse will be able to receive well?
QUOTES
“Communication is so essential. I don’t know if there's ever a couple that comes in for counseling and it’s not an issue.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It sounds simple enough, but at the same time most couples are struggling with communication.” - Lindsay Few
“It’s important that you pay attention to each other. That you value it and listen to each other.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“There are so many distractions in life. It’s important to tune in.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Instead of blaming our spouse because they’re not listening well, ask how well am I communicating with them?” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We have a responsibility to grow in self awareness, and marriage is a beautiful way to do that.“ Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Turn to God and ask him to renew your mind with our NEW resource, 11 Prayers To Stop Thinking Negatively About Your Spouse
15 Better Assumptions To Make About Your Spouse is a free printable to help you set your mind on what is true, right and good. Learn more here!
Follow Awesome Marriage on Instagram for more marriage tips!
Tue, 22 Oct 2024 - 40min - 777 - Don’t Fight About the Wrong Things, Find Your Real Marriage Issue | Ep. 646
Are you truly resolving your marriage issues? Most couples experience recurring arguments that never truly resolve. This cycle leaves you with two problems: 1, You never solved the issue, and 2, now one or both are hurt and angry. Plus you’ve got some baggage around the issue, too. Today we’re going to help you learn how to resolve the actual issues.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What NOT to do in a recurring argument
Communication tips to help you prevent conflict
Conversation hacks to prevent defensiveness
The process to understand the REAL underlying issues
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: If you have recurring arguments (most couples do!) there’s probably a deeper issue you’re not aware of. Get under the surface to resolve the real issue.
Questions to Discuss:
On a scale from 1-10, how well do you and your spouse resolve your marriage conflict?
Better communication helps you address the real issues you need to resolve. What is one step you can take to grow your communication today?
QUOTES
"Most couples have recurring arguments that never truly resolve" - Lindsay Few
"Being vulnerable builds intimacy and trust." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Using 'I' statements takes ownership and responsibility." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Learning to resolve conflict in a healthy way is a gift to your marriage." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is a printable resource to help you address conflict the healthy way. Grab the free cheat sheet HERE!
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Has infidelity damaged your marriage? Sign up for Dr. Kim’s webinar Rebuilding Trust and Establishing Healthy Boundaries After an Affair and learn what steps to take next.
15 Better Assumptions To Make About Your Spouse is a free printable to help you set your mind on what is true, right and good. Learn more here!
Follow Awesome Marriage on Instagram for more marriage tips!
Tue, 15 Oct 2024 - 43min - 776 - How to Choose Your Battles Well | Ep. 645
How well do you choose your battles? If you struggle with recurring conflict in marriage, you might need to work on choosing your battles. On the other hand, if you’re feeling resentment but you’re not sure how to address it… you might need to work on choosing your battles. Today Dr. Kim is going to help you learn how to choose your battles well.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Knowing when to stand your ground vs. when to let go
The underlying message in your recurring marriage issues
How to balance love and grace with speaking the truth
The path to build trust for open and honest feedback
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Some things are not worth arguing over! You can reduce the tension in your marriage by learning to choose your battles better.
Questions to Discuss:
What situations tend to end in recurring arguments in your marriage?
Are any of those battles you can let go of, instead of fighting?
Is there any resentment you need to let go of today?
QUOTES
Instead of being critical, learn to work together. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
Stay faithful to agreements you’ve made. The things you agreed on affect one another. - Lindsay Few
It doesn’t have to be a battle. - Lindsay Few
Getting defensive just never works. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is a printable resource to help you address conflict the healthy way. Grab the free cheat sheet HERE!
Has infidelity damaged your marriage? Sign up for Dr. Kim’s webinar Rebuilding Trust and Establishing Healthy Boundaries After an Affair and learn what steps to take next.
15 Better Assumptions To Make About Your Spouse is a free printable to help you set your mind on what is true, right and good. Learn more here!
What situations tend to end in recurring arguments in your marriage?
Are any of those battles you can let go of, instead of fighting?
Is there any resentment you need to let go of today?
QUOTES
Instead of being critical, learn to work together. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
Stay faithful to agreements you’ve made. The things you agreed on affect one another. - Lindsay Few
It doesn’t have to be a battle. - Lindsay Few
Getting defensive just never works. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is a printable resource to help you address conflict the healthy way. Grab the free cheat sheet HERE!
Has infidelity damaged your marriage? Sign up for Dr. Kim’s webinar Rebuilding Trust and Establishing Healthy Boundaries After an Affair and learn what steps to take next.
15 Better Assumptions To Make About Your Spouse is a free printable to help you set your mind on what is true, right and good. Learn more here!
Tue, 08 Oct 2024 - 45min - 775 - How to Have Hope in the Darkest Times with Ken Guidroz | Ep. 644
After a few “golden years” of ministry for Ken Guidroz and his family, things imploded. When Ken had to face the unimaginable as a dad, faith was hard to find. Hope seemed distant as he, his wife, and their marriage both struggled to recover. Today Ken shares the story of how they clung to each other and found hope to move forward together, through their darkest season.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How to hold onto faith when you feel hopeless
Maintaining marriage unity while holding different parenting values
How to recover from marriage disagreements you can’t forget
Ken’s story of breaking through to the other side after a dark season
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: When your marriage is rocked by the unexpected, allow your spouse to process the way they need to. Focus on supporting one another, and finding common bonds.
Questions to Discuss:
What has been your hardest marriage season? What helped you stay close in that time?
What is one way you can strengthen your marriage today to protect it for the future?
QUOTES
In some ways, it was our toughest time ever. In other ways, it was “you and me, honey, against the world.” - Ken Guidroz
To say we felt like we had a scarlet letter on our chest is an understatement. - Ken Guidroz
We were partners in the pit. It was tough. But it also cemented us for life. - Ken Guidroz
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find more of Ken’s writing, including his book, Letters to My Son in Jail, on his website
15 Better Assumptions To Make About Your Spouse is a free printable to help you set your mind on what is true, right and good. Learn more here!
Fri, 04 Oct 2024 - 47min - 774 - How to Build a Biblical Perspective in Marriage | Ep. 643
Your mindset greatly impacts your day to day life. If you’re stuck in unhealthy or unhelpful thought patterns, both you and your marriage will suffer. But there are simple ways to unpack your thought patterns and replace the unhelpful with a biblical perspective. In today’s episode we’re looking at practical ways to adopt a gracious, life-giving perspective in marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Common perspective mistakes in marriage and what causes them
Practical tips to resolve perspective issues and create a Biblical perspective
What do secret sin and perspective have in common?
Ways to communicate more effectively and seek to understand your spouse's perspective
Tips to cultivate oneness and a spiritual foundation of unity
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Is your perspective of your spouse realistic? For most issues, a generous perspective and good communication can get you through it together.
Questions to Discuss:
Do you have any unrealistic expectations of your spouse today? If you’re not sure, check them out together.
Are you and your spouse at odds over an issue? Take the time to learn what matters most to your spouse about their position on it.
Do you have thought habits that are leading to bitterness or resentment in your marriage?
QUOTES
"It's hard to step into your spouse's shoes or take the time to do that, to have empathy for them." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"Resentment can be a huge thing and it's so dangerous because if we don't stop it, it continues to grow." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Perspective is your lens on the world. If your lens is covered with smudges and you’re not seeing clearly, that’s not the world’s fault. You’ve got to clean your lens.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
If you are ready to have a better perspective – and a better marriage, then the biblically-based 4 Week Reframing Challenge is for you!
Turn to God and ask him to renew your mind with our NEW resource, 11 Prayers To Stop Thinking Negatively About Your Spouse
15 Better Assumptions To Make About Your Spouse is a free printable to help you set your mind on what is true, right and good. Learn more here!
Join the Marriage Changer Movement! Because a world full of awesome marriages can change the world Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!Tue, 01 Oct 2024 - 45min - 773 - Essential Steps to Affair Recovery with Rick Reynolds | Ep. 642
An affair doesn’t have to mean the end of a marriage. At Awesome Marriage, we have seen so many marriages restored! Yet the recovery process will take time and working together to see the Lord heal the union. If you’ve experienced this pain, you need a guide to help you along the way.
Rick Reynolds joins Dr. Kim today to share his story of marriage recovery, and how he’s used his own painful experience to help others through the process of rebuilding after infidelity.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How to avoid common behaviors that can set you up for an affair
How to rebuild a marriage after affair - better than before
Why Christians need to be aware of their own vulnerability
How to overcome the obstacles to recovering after infidelity
Common mistakes in the affair recovery process
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: One of the best ways to protect your marriage from an affair is to realize you could be vulnerable to infidelity, and put boundaries in place. If your marriage has experienced infidelity, it can be restored much stronger than before.
Questions to Discuss:
What boundaries do you have in your life to prevent even baby steps toward an affair?
Are you a safe place for your spouse to be completely honest and open? What would help make your marriage a safer place for honesty?
QUOTES
“When we fall, what’s important is what we do afterwards.” - Rick Reynolds
“A lot of Christians don’t realize they’re vulnerable, so they don’t put constraints in place. Then they find themselves in a mess.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“What heals is empathy and emotional responsiveness.” - Rick Reynolds
“The wayward spouse needs to understand that disclosure is the way that trust is reestablished.” - Rick Reynolds
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more or sign up for the Hope Rising Conference at AffairRecovery.com
If you feel defeated about your marriage, or are considering divorce, our 90 Days to Save Your Marriage plan is for you. Learn more here.
Fri, 27 Sep 2024 - 49min - 772 - Harness the Power of Having a Plan for Your Money with Dan and Kay Ockey | Ep. 641
When costs keep rising, and earnings often don’t match, money stress is bound to invade your marriage. Most couples face additional tension around how to handle finances well – as well as how to handle them together.
In today’s podcast, Dr. Kim talks with Dan and Kay Ockey about how to take control of your finances, even in times of financial uncertainty. Dan and Kay offer concrete and actionable advice on how to take the steps to get out of debt, make a realistic plan, and work together. Tune in for help to get your finances in order.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The action plan for how to start tracking finances
Productive ways to handle the realities of inflation and financial uncertainty
2 keys for financial success in a marriage
Use this reframing shift and fight over finances less
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
"The magic bullet doesn't exist, but being real about your numbers and not spending more than you make is key." - Dan Ockey
“We’re finding that among a lot of people there’s an expectation you should have the life you want.” - Dan Ockey
“We may not have the money to do all the things we want right now, and that’s ok. You’re not a failure - you can work toward that.” - Dan Ockey
“Our money conversations were so painful. Then I realized that our unity was more important than my beliefs about money.” - Dan Ockey
Couples Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Unity in your marriage finances requires a team mindset, learning about each other, and learning the skills to handle money well.
Questions to Discuss:
What financial beliefs are keeping you from unity in your marriage?
Are you working toward a common goal together today? If not, work together to set one.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn how to avoid the 4 common budgeting mistakes couples make when in the FREE Centsei Class. Learn more here.
Get the budget conversation started with 27 Money Questions Every Couple Needs to Ask
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Tue, 24 Sep 2024 - 53min - 771 - Amazon Surprises & Online Money Issues | Ep. 640
Show of hands: Are you an Amazon box hider? … or do you have your spouse break down the boxes for you?
All joking aside, online shopping can be an issue that hinders couples’ closeness. Money management in general can be a hot topic, but the wide range of ways we can spend money online with just the click of a button can create some additional obstacles, and we hear about it from couples all the time. Today we’re equipping you to resolve this issue.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Red flags that you need to address online spending with your spouse.
The role of trust in marriage money habits
How to know when online shopping has become a problem
The negative cycle of emotional triggers
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“When you look into what’s most important with money, you make a lot more progress more quickly.” - Lindsay Few
"When you quit being a team, that's when it becomes a problem." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
"If shopping is getting in the way of closeness with your spouse, then something needs to change." - Dr. Kim Kimberling
Couple's Conversation Guide:
Main takeaway: Money secrets do not serve your marriage well, so do what it takes to build trust with your spouse around finances.
Questions to Discuss:
Are there any money habits your spouse does not know about you?
What areas bring out money tension for your marriage?
What is one step that would help you work through that and build unity today?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn how to avoid the 4 common budgeting mistakes couples make when in the FREE Centsei Class. Learn more here.
Get the budget conversation started with 27 Money Questions Every Couple Needs to Ask
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Tue, 17 Sep 2024 - 34min - 770 - Finding Hope Through Our Failures with Becky Kiser | Ep. 639
We don’t often talk about our failures, but maybe that needs to change. It’s easy to focus on others’ highlight reel, while we’re highly aware of our own personal shortcomings. But the shame of feeling like we don’t measure up keeps us from real relationships.
Today we’re going there with special guest, Becky Kiser, as we talk about the power of the gospel and how God uses us in spite of our shortcomings. Don’t miss this powerful conversation.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Fight the cascade effect of feeling like a failure
The two most debated sections of Becky’s new book - and why!
The 1st step to start loving your spouse well
How to move out of shame and into freedom
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Even women who are successful; women who have accomplished a bunch, deal with failure.” - Becky Kiser
“The Gospel message is not, ‘Get your life together then God can do something with your life.’” - Becky Kiser
“I’ve found the most freedom from acknowledging I can’t.” - Becky Kiser
"Not all failures are actual failures. They’re just a part of life.” - Becky Kiser
"We spend so much time ‘dying to ourselves’ that we think there’s no value to ourselves.” - Becky Kiser
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find Becky at https://www.beckykiser.com/ and on Instagram @beckykiser
Grab the new book, “But God Can” today!
Get the budget conversation started with 27 Money Questions Every Couple Needs to Ask
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Tue, 10 Sep 2024 - 54min - 769 - Tips for Care-Giving Spouses with Kristin & Todd Evans | Ep. 638
After five years of marriage, Kristin and Todd Evans’ world was rocked when they learned they were about to become parents to a child with a disability. The stress, grief and the demands of learning to be caregivers to a child with disabilities transformed their once-joyful marriage and nearly broke it apart.
When spouses are also caregivers, the marriage will face challenges that others may not know anything about. Today Todd and Kristin share their powerful story of learning to navigate this reality and how they have kept their marriage strong through it all.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The additional challenges parents face as caregivers
Learning to cope with the ‘living loss’ of disability
How to set and communicate priorities in an unending to do list
Ways to deepening emotional connection & intimacy while always “on call”
Handling grief and chronic sorrow together
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“For all parents, there’s a sacrificial piece to it. For special needs parents, it goes to a new level of what you have to sacrifice.” - Todd Evans
“1 in 3 caregivers experience depression and anxiety.” - Kristin Evans
“I couldn’t understand why I couldn't’ get over my grief, but Todd had moved on.” - Kristin Evans
“There’s not a right or wrong way to grieve, it’s just different.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Order the Evans’ book, How to Build a Thriving Marriage as You Care for Children with Disabilities
Follow @DisabilityParenting on Instagram for more great tips!
Get the budget conversation started with 27 Money Questions Every Couple Needs to Ask
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Fri, 06 Sep 2024 - 48min - 768 - Simple Budgeting Tips that Work | Ep. 637
Reduce money stress in your marriage by making sure your money knows where to go!
Don’t avoid talking about money with your spouse: Establishing a budget you can both stick to will certainly pay off long term. Today Dr. Kim shares several simple tricks that help him and Nancy to stress less and be intentional with their finances.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The basic starting point for building a budget
The budget category Dr. Kim & Nancy would NEVER cut out
The power of breaking a scarcity mindset and becoming generous
Strategies to better money management
How to get started if you’ve never budgeted
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“We felt like it was always important to have a date.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Make sure to build in your budget that you can go out somewhere each week and not have to worry about it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“God is so generous, and that’s really what we want to emulate.” - Lindsay Few
“My lack of generosity was not the person I wanted to be.” - Lindsay Few
Continue to ask, “What are our financial goals? How do we budget to make them work?” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If you need help, get it. If you’re going to fight about money for 50 years, that doesn’t sound fun at all. ”- Dr. Kim Kimberling
“When you tithe 10%, the 90% you have left goes a lot further than you thought the 100% would.” - Lindsay Few
“I don’t know anyone personally who would say they regret tithing.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Get the budget conversation started with 27 Money Questions Every Couple Needs to Ask
Learn how to avoid the 4 common budgeting mistakes couples make when in the FREE Centsei Class. Learn more here.
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!
Tue, 03 Sep 2024 - 46min - 767 - Healthy Tech Habits For A Healthy Marriage with Arlene Pellicane | Ep. 636
Do your habits online support your marriage? Or damage it?
Fewer couples are getting married than ever. Tech is hitting marriages hard today. Yet research shows that marriage can provide a huge boost to personal happiness. Today’s guest Arlene Pellicane has written several books on how technology is impacting relationships, and today she shares tech habits that will help you and your marriage to thrive.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The 1 habit that leads to a 99% marriage success rate
Simple to streamline your tech habits for more connection
Why today’s tech affects relationships differently than before
Research shows how marriage can impact happiness
Parenting tips to break unhealthy tech habits and get your child back
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“If we seek God and His guidance, He’s always going to have an answer.” Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Is technology bringing you closer together? Or causing you to grow farther apart.” - Arlene Pellicane
“We're missing all these little times to connect. That’s why you feel disconnected.” - Arlene Pellicane
“You have to prepare to be unpopular, because as a parent, it’s your job to protect your child.” - Arlene Pellicane
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
If you need help with family tech habits, DO NOT miss Arlene’s books on the topic.
National Marriage Week is each February 7-14th – and their great marriage building resources are available all year long! Learn more and support the mission on the WEB, FACEBOOK, X (TWITTER) or INSTAGRAM !
Learn more about what boundaries can do for your marriage in Dr. Kim’s free Building Healthy Boundaries Webinar. Learn more here!
What could 1 intentional weekend do for you and your spouse? Find out when you take on our Marriage Weekend Challenge! Click to learn more!
Don’t let screens come between you: Use our free 17 Questions Every Couple Should Ask About Tech printable to get on the same page!
Marriage Multiplier is a quick and highly practical weekly email to help you invest in your marriage. CLICK HERE to learn more!Fri, 30 Aug 2024 - 54min - 766 - Tech Boundaries Your Marriage Needs | Ep. 635Tue, 27 Aug 2024 - 37min
- 765 - Help! My Marriage Feels Out of Control | Ep. 634Fri, 23 Aug 2024 - 35min
- 764 - Is it Too Late To Save My Marriage? | Ep. 633Tue, 20 Aug 2024 - 35min
- 763 - Is Everyone Else Happier Than Me? with Sarah Bragg | Ep. 632
We’ve all wondered at some point … is everyone else living a better life? It looks like they might be, and social media only seems to confirm it!
That’s why we’re delighted to bring you Dr. Kim’s conversation with today’s guest, Sarah Bragg, of the Surviving Sarah podcast. In today’s episode, we’ll hear Sarah’s take on feeling “stuck” in life, how to become happier, and steps to overcome the idea that someone else’s life is better than yours.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why we face the questions that keep us up at night
Practical strategies for when you feel stuck in life
How to deal with experiencing grief in midlife
Guardrails to protect yourself from the effects of comparison
Staving off the effects of unhappiness in your marriage
Our Couples Conversation Guide helps you apply each episode’s content. Click here to get each week’s guide!
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“We can look back and see where we’ve been. But when we look forward we don’t know what it’s going to look like.” - Sarah Bragg
“When we keep it inside, it grows. It feels bigger than it really is.” - Sarah Bragg
“We all grieve in different ways, over different things.” Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It’s okay to just keep showing up and trying.” - Sarah Bragg
“In this age of social media, it’s nothing but compare and compete.” - Sarah Bragg
“Connection is the root of happiness.” - Sarah Bragg
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Order Sarah’s book, Is Everyone Happier Than Me?
Listen to the Surviving Sarah podcast and find more from Sarah on her website &
@SarahWBragg on Instagram!
Don’t let screens come between you: Use our free 17 Questions Every Couple Should Ask About Tech printable to get on the same page!
Our Couples Conversation Guide helps you apply each episode’s content. Click here to get each week’s guide!
Fri, 16 Aug 2024 - 42min - 762 - Why Get Married? The Health Benefits of Marriage | Ep. 631
Did you know that marriage can be good for you? Marriage is not always viewed as the gift from God that it actually is, but He has designed this relationship to provide some *amazing* benefits to both spouses.
Today Dr. Kim is sharing several of the ways a healthy marriage supports health and wellness for you, your spouse and your family. Tune in to learn more!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The benefits of a good marriage for mental and physical health
Health effects on kids and families
The damaging effects of loneliness - even in marriage
Steps you can take to combat loneliness
Hidden benefits of the process of working on things you need to work on
Our Couples Conversation Guide helps you apply each episode’s content. To get each week’s guide click here to subscribe!
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“There’s all kinds of incentives to work on your marriage, and this is one of them: If you have a healthy marriage, you have a healthier, longer life.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We hear about so much depression; so much anxiety. Everybody’s under stress. Marriage can help your mental health.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I was out of my comfort zone, and any time you do that is uncomfortable, but on the other side there might be something really helpful.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Don’t let screens come between you: Use our free 17 Questions Every Couple Should Ask About Tech printable to get on the same page!
Life’s unpredictable. Build a solid foundation for your marriage with 21 Prayers to Build an Awesome Marriage
Are you ready to join the mission? Our Marriage Changers exist because a world full of awesome marriages can change the world! Learn more HERE
Our Couples Conversation Guide helps you apply each episode’s content. To get each week’s guide click here to subscribe!
We are here to help! Email Info@awesomemarriage.com any time.
Our Healthy Self / Healthy Marriage Podcast Series goes deeper:
Why Does Physical Health Matter In Marriage? | Ep. 520
The Connection Between Emotional & Spiritual Health | Ep. 521
Mental Health & Your Marriage | Ep. 522
Answering Listener Questions | Ep. 523
Tue, 13 Aug 2024 - 39min - 761 - Why Get Married? Biblical Purposes for Marriage | Ep. 630
Does marriage still matter in this day and age? We say a resounding yes!
Marriage was designed by God, and there are several purposes the Bible gives for why marriage matters. Today we’re digging into what Scripture says about the value of marriage. Tune in to learn God’s purposes for the marriage relationship, and why they matter in your marriage!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Dr. Kim’s list of biblical purposes for marriage
Several ideas for what it means to “be fruitful” in marriage
The power of a marriage model - and tips on how to find one
The ripple effect of an intentional marriage
Ways your marriage can be a light in our dark world
Our Couples Conversation Guide helps you apply each episode’s content. To get each new guide, click here to subscribe!
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“No marriage is perfect. But if you’re a couple steps ahead, you’ve navigated some things that others haven’t.” - Lindsay Few
“My dream for the marriage changers is that they’re learning, growing and passing that on.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Prayer has had such an impact on our marriage. When God answers prayer like He does, we want to tell everybody what He’s done!” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
The things God calls us to do bring glory to God. They bring us joy, life and peace, and they also bring light and encouragement to others.” - Lindsay Few
“Yes, it’s hard at times. Yes, there are things you have to work through. But the big picture result is worth it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Don’t let screens come between you: Use our free 17 Questions Every Couple Should Ask About Tech printable to get on the same page!
Life’s unpredictable. Build a solid foundation for your marriage with 21 Prayers to Build an Awesome Marriage
We are here to help! Email Info@awesomemarriage.com any time.
Are you ready to join the mission? Our Marriage Changers exist because a world full of awesome marriages can change the world! Learn more HERE
Our Couples Conversation Guide helps you apply each episode’s content. You’ll get each new guide when you click here to subscribe!
Tue, 06 Aug 2024 - 36min - 760 - Hope for Marriage in Today's Culture with Gabrielle McCullough | Ep. 629
Is it harder to live a faithful life today than in times past? Today’s world does provide some unique challenges that couples face, but there are also unique opportunities. Today’s conversation with Gabrielle McCullough sheds light on some of the ways today’s world can be deeply impacted by Jesus and the effects of our faith can have on marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Unique challenges and unique opportunities for faith in Gen Z
3 questions for biblical accountability
A challenge to help you find your place in the local church
The impact of following Jesus on every aspect of life
Why the local church is still relevant and needed today
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Following Jesus impacts every area of your life.” - Gabrielle McCullough
“We follow Jesus because he has our hearts. There’s an obedience that is compelled that isn’t out of drudgery but out of true delight.” - Gabrielle McCullough
“They want something that’s authentic. That excites me about my generation.” - Gabrielle McCullough
There’s a beauty in asking, ‘how can I serve the church?’ instead of asking how others can serve me.” - Gabrielle McCullough
“As Christians, our responsibility is to love people the way Christ loves them; with love and with truth.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If marriages can be healthy and strong, what a testament to the world of who Jesus is and the way he fights for his Bride.” - Gabrielle McCullough
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find Gabrielle on Instagram, TikTok, and on her website
The Christmas in July Sale is on at Awesome Marriage University and that means you get 30% ANY and ALL of our online marriage courses! BROWSE our course offerings to find which one your marriage needs and use the code JULY at checkout!
Our 5 Days to Deeper Emotional Intimacy digital resource provides practical steps to understand and share your emotions, and to work together to grow your emotional intimacy…and it’s our gift to you for your donation of any amount.
Tue, 30 Jul 2024 - 54min - 759 - Help for the Insecure Spouse | Ep. 628
Has you or your spouse’s insecurity affected your marriage? We’re all insecure about something, and the way we see ourselves will end up spilling over into the way we relate to others. Nowhere is this more likely to happen than in marriage.
In this episode Dr. Kim and Christina share ways to address your insecurity and your spouse’s insecurity, including a surprising way Dr. Kim has learned to turn his weaknesses to strengths. Tune in for wisdom and practical tips.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How insecurity affects a marriageAdvice if your spouse’s insecurity is weighing you down
Advice if your OWN insecurity weighs you downPractical steps to overcome insecurity
How to fight back against your insecurities
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“How you view yourself absolutely affects how you’re going to interact with others.” - Christina Dodson
“I think the role of the spouse is to build each other up. Your marriage should be your safest place, next to your relationship with God.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Perfection is not what God expects from you, nor should anyone else be expecting it from you.” - Christina Dodson
“You begin to believe the things God says about you and who you are in Christ, and that changes your countenance. You will look like a different person.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“There’s less holding you back if you’re not weighed down by your insecurities. There’s more joy, more abundance, freedom to enjoy life together. ” - Christina Dodson
“One thing God does so well for us is he loves us right where we are. Our goal is to love our spouse right where they are.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You can’t take it over. You can’t fix it for them. But you can come alongside and do what God wants you to do.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“No one is thinking about you as much as you’re thinking about you. To me, that’s really freeing!” - Christina Dodson
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Our 5 Days to Deeper Emotional Intimacy digital resource provides practical steps to understand and share your emotions, and to work together to grow your emotional intimacy…and it’s our gift to you for your donation of any amount.
The Christmas in July Sale is on at Awesome Marriage University and that means you get 30% OFF ANY and ALL of our online marriage courses! BROWSE our course offerings to find which one your marriage needs and use the code JULY at checkout!
Tue, 23 Jul 2024 - 33min - 758 - Deepen The Emotional Intimacy in Your Marriage | Ep. 627
Want better connection with your spouse? One thing we hear a lot from couples is that they don’t feel close to each other or that their relationship feels like it’s missing some depth. That’s why today we’re re-airing this episode from Dr. Kim and Christina that talks all about emotional intimacy and gives you ideas of practical ways to deepen the emotional intimacy in your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What is emotional intimacy, and why does it matter?
Warning signs you need to grow in this area
Emotional intimacy killers to avoid
Tips to start working on this - alone, and together
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“It is hard work knowing someone. You have to pay attention. It takes work to be intimate.” - Christina Dodson
“Laziness and business are going to block your intimacy, so we have to fight against those things.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Give yourself opportunities to connect.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It adds value to my marriage for me to have a relationship with my friends, just like it benefits our marriage that he has guy friends.” - Christina Dodson
“You could have had the best childhood in the world and you still have baggage because we’re human. That’s okay, and you can deal with that.” - Christina Dodson
“You can’t be emotionally intimate with your spouse if you aren’t aware of your own emotions.” - Christina Dodson
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Our 5 Days to Deeper Emotional Intimacy digital resource provides practical steps to understand and share your emotions, and to work together to grow your emotional intimacy…and it’s our gift to you for your donation of any amount.
Your marriage can only be as healthy as the two of you are. The Bible says, “Let us examine our ways and test them and let us return to the Lord” (Lamentations 3:40). Our new Self Check-In Guide will help you do just that!
Print out this Feelings Chart and use it to help you talk about your emotions.
Our Questions To Help Your Spouse Open Up resource is a simple way to help build the closeness between you and your spouseAccountability is a biblical and helpful tool for growing in holiness.
Tue, 16 Jul 2024 - 34min - 757 - Gospel Truth for Your Marriage with Willie Robertson | Ep. 626
What is a “gospeler”?
It’s probably a lot simpler than you think! It is something that will certainly impact you and your marriage, but also has the potential to have a huge impact on others around you.
Today Willie Robertson shares how one person sharing the Gospel impacted thousands, starting with his family, and he explains just how simple it can be to begin to care enough for others to share the Gospel with them.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Gospel genealogy & the ripple effect one conversation can have
The Biblical basis for this kind of conversation
Where to start if you don’t know where to start
Advice for parents to share their faith in parenting
Different ways to approach sharing your faith
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“When you’re active in sharing your faith, it takes care of a lot of other things for you as well.” - Willie Robertston
“The great commission was for all of us.” - Willie Robertston
“Make disciples, baptize people, teach people; you’re not going to do any of those 3 unless you open your mouth.” - Willie Robertston
“It starts with caring about people.” - Willie Robertston
“You start learning the Word, you’ll start standing out in the crowd.” - Willie Robertston
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Order Willie’s new book, Gospeler today!
Find more from Willie at DuckCommander.com and WillieRobertson.com
Our 5 Days to Deeper Emotional Intimacy digital resource provides practical steps to understand and share your emotions, and to work together to grow your emotional intimacy…and it’s our gift to you for your donation of any amount.
Fri, 12 Jul 2024 - 54min - 756 - Worth Repeating | Intimacy VS Control - You Can't Have Both | Ep. 625
Are you ever a bit too helpful in your marriage? Do you find yourself frustrated with the way your spouse responds to you?
You may be trying to control your spouse by “helping” even if you don’t mean to!
Today Laura Doyle from the Empowered Wife Podcast joins Dr. Kim to teach us some ways to shift our marriage culture - without resorting to control tactics. Tune in to learn how!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Empowering ways to shift the culture of your marriage, even if your spouse isn’t on board
“Cheat phrases” to help you shift from controlling tendencies to deeper intimacy
The unexpected lesson of sitting down with your spouse and getting nothing done!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find more of Laura’s content, including her free Empowered Wife Road Map on her website
Check out Laura’s book, the Empowered Wife!
Our 5 Days to Deeper Emotional Intimacy digital resource provides practical steps to understand and share your emotions, and to work together to grow your emotional intimacy…and it’s our gift to you for your donation of any amount.
Tue, 09 Jul 2024 - 47min - 755 - Love Your Spouse...As You Love Yourself? with Bryan Crum | Ep. 623
Most of us deal with self doubt, regret, and feelings of not measuring up. But learning to love ourselves properly means learning to see ourselves as God does, and it allows us to love others more freely and graciously.
Today, Bryan Crum will help you step away from nagging self doubts and into a solid biblical perspective. Give your marriage the gift of seeing yourself and your spouse through God’s eyes.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Unexpected lessons learned from people who are facing their mortality
Why is it hard to accept loving and valuing ourselves properly?
Rewriting negative messages we’ve learned
Ideas to break away from self-doubt
Why relationships are needed to help us learn to love ourselves
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“I’m on a mission to help people fall in love with God’s greatest creation; and that’s us.” - Bryan Crum
“We all want to know our time on this earth means something.” - Bryan Crum
“I’ve discovered 2 truths about living: 1. We’re priceless. 2. For some reason, we’ve forgotten that truth.” - Bryan Crum
“We interact with people every day but we don’t always treat them like they are valuable.” - Bryan Crum
“When we acknowledge the truth of what we’re worth, we’re acknowledging a truth heaven knows well.” - Bryan Crum
“The first step is to stop comparing ourselves to each other.” - Bryan Crum
“There's power in giving each other the benefit of the doubt.” - Bryan Crum
“Giving each other grace is a small step that covers a lot of distance.” - Bryan Crum
“Marriage is promising each other that we’re all-in. We’ve got to make the conscious choice to say, ‘I’m still here.’” - Bryan Crum
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
If your marriage is doing okay but could use a jumpstart, then this 5 Week Marriage Refresher Challenge is for you!
Find more from Bryan HERE
Order Bryan’s book, Neighbor, Love Yourself HERE
Fri, 21 Jun 2024 - 42min - 754 - How Does the Bible Say to Handle Conflict? With Donna Jones | Ep. 624
Conflict is no one’s favorite, but it is an inevitable part of life. And today Donna Jones teaches us why it’s nothing to be afraid of by busting some of the most common misunderstandings that lead to conflict avoidance, and providing a biblical roadmap to handle conflict in a healthy way.
Tune in to learn more about approaching conflict in a healthy, biblical way.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The biggest mistakes most couples make in conflict
The trick to de-escalate in the heat of the moment.
The inner characteristics that build better conflict habits
Help to break conflict patterns in your marriage
The healthy way to apologize well
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“When we handle conflict in a healthy way, the outcome is peace. Peace between us and who we have conflict with; peace in our own souls.” - Donna Jones
“When we are in conflict, it literally affects everything about us. We function, but on the inside, we’re torn to pieces.” - Donna Jones
“The reason so many of us think conflict is bad, is that we never learned to see how conflict can turn out good.” - Donna Jones
“When we have conflict, we tend to think it means 1 of 3 things: There’s something wrong with you; there’s something wrong with me, or there’s something wrong with us. But conflict doesn’t mean that.” - Donna Jones
“No relationship can survive an atmosphere of disrespect over the long haul.” - Donna Jones
“The most important thing is not an act, it’s an attitude: Humility.” - Donna Jones
“If you want to know how strong a person really is, look for humility.” - Donna Jones
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Order Donna’s book Healthy Conflict, Peaceful Life today!
Find Donna on her website, on Instagram @DonnaAJones or Facebook @donnajonesspeak/
For more help to break the conflict cycle, sign up for Dr. Kim’s “8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar”
If your marriage is feeling a bit blah, the Marriage Refresher is the jumpstart you need to bring fresh life into your marriage!
Wed, 19 Jun 2024 - 58min - 753 - Gaslighting & Narcissism Q & A | Ep. 622
We have gotten a lot of questions about gaslighting and narcissism, and today Dr. Kim is answering. This topic is layered and one podcast episode cannot take the place of more in-depth interventions, but we can offer helpful and hopeful next steps. In today’s episode we’re covering how to know what constitutes abuse versus the sin nature we all struggle with. Listen for
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Marriage counseling doesn’t work with abusers – So what does?
Can a marriage recover after long-term gaslighting?
How to diagnose abuse using the power and control wheel
Does the “gray rock” strategy work in marriage?
Reasons why emotional abuse is often dismissed
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Narcissism is all about power and control. Neither of those have a place in marriage at all.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I don't think God expects anyone to live in an abusive situation. In many ways, it’s as much a violation of vows as adultery is to not take seriously your vow to love and cherish your spouse.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You deserve to be safe.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If you look at the message of the BIble, you can’t defend any type of abuse, for any person, ever.” - Lindsay Few
“The goal would be repentance and reconciliation.” - Lindsay Few
“The reason a lot of people minimize emotional abuse because they haven’t seen it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I’ve seen people who gaslight and don't really understand what they’ve been doing.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Nobody’s uplifted or brought closer to Christ through manipulative behaviors.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
The Power and Control Wheel is helpful to understand what constitutes abuse
If your marriage is doing okay but could use a jumpstart, then this 5 Week Marriage Refresher Challenge is for you!
Past episodes on the topic:
When is Enough Enough? With Dr. David E. Clarke
Recent series with Kathy’s Story
Escaping an Emotionally Abusive Marriage: Kathy’s Story | Ep. 608
Escaping an Emotionally Abusive Marriage Part 2: Seeking Church Support | Kathy’s Story Ep. 609
Escaping an Emotionally Abusive Marriage Part 3: Help to Get Out and Get Safe | Ep. 610
Tue, 18 Jun 2024 - 50min - 752 - How to Find Purpose As a Dad with Kent Evans | Ep. 621
Is there a war on fathers? Our guest on today’s podcast thinks so. The impact of fathers on their kids is so valuable, yet it’s incredibly difficult to know how to engage purposefully in the process of parenting.
If you’ve had a hand in raising kids, you already know that parenting is not for the faint of heart! That’s why we are so thankful to share today’s episode and Kent Evans’ practical advice and encouragement for dads. Kent Evans is a wise and helpful mentor for dads who are searching for their purpose in parenting. Listen and learn Kent’s simple, practical tips for dads and moms alike.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What prevents dads from being confident to engage in fatherhood?
The reasons why your kids need an imperfect dad
Advice for the dad who feels like it’s too late to start to engage well
Steps to growing in your purpose as a dad
Advice for the wife who wants her husband to engage
An incredible tip for finding friends & community
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Satan wants us to take us out of the fatherhood game by getting us to self-select and walk off the field.” - Kent Evans
“God wants to be known as a dad, therefore there’s a war on fathers.” - Kent Evans
“My experience as a dad is that God can take care of the things I mess up.” - Dr. Kim
“Even if we could be perfect, it would not be beneficial. It would deprive them of the example of how to fall off the horse then get back on.” - Kent Evans
There are few things more motivating to a man than the praise of his wife, but it’s multiplied by an exponent when she does it in front of the children.” - Kent Evans
“I didn’t get it right. I didn’t do it perfectly, but God took my loaves and fishes and they landed as nourishment.”
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Grab Kent’s great tools for dads at ManhoodJourney.org
Listen to the Father on Purpose Podcast
With the Creative Questions Bundle you will NOT lack for great conversation topics! Get all the details here!
Sign up here to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each episode!
Fri, 14 Jun 2024 - 59min - 751 - Help to Get Out of A Marriage Rut | Ep. 620
Marriage doesn’t have to get boring … but for too many couples, it has. If you’re ready to break out of the routine and restore the joy in your marriage, this one's for you!
Listen for ways to have more interesting and connective conversations, new ideas of things to try, and how to avoid common mistakes that keep couples from enjoying their marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Better questions to ask for better conversations
2 common mistakes that keep couples from having fun together
Several ideas for fun things to try
For Dr. Kim’s bullet point list of steps, sign up for the Conversation Guide
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“When we’re dating our future wife, we guys up our game.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We loved our time with our kids, but we realized we also had to be intentional about our marriage.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You have to give yourself time to do the fun stuff. The mundane will still be there when you’re done.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
With the Creative Questions Bundle you will NOT lack for great conversation topics! Get all the details here!
Check in on your marriage each week with our Weekly Check In Guide to keep your connection strong
Sign up here to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each episode!
Questions to Help Your Spouse Open Up
Is there a marriage resource you need us to make? Tell us your idea!
Arlene Pellicane will be on the podcast later this summer. She has written some great books on tech in the family!
Cool, Calm and Connected: 5 Digital Habits for a More Balanced Life
Growing Up Social: Raising Relational Kids in a Screen-Driven World
Screen Kids: 5 Skills Every Child Needs in a Tech-Driven World
Tue, 11 Jun 2024 - 36min - 750 - How to Reconnect a Disconnected Marriage | Ep. 619
Do you ever feel like you and your spouse are two ships passing in the night? Strangers living under the same roof? Business partners executing the plans you’ve made for your kids and household? Then you’re in a disconnected marriage. The marriage relationship should nurture both spouses.
If you’ve lost the connection in your marriage, or just want to step up from where you are right now, tune in today to learn the practical steps for reconnecting.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why do couples disconnect?
The steps to reconnection
A helpful source for fun marriage ideas and resources
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Little tweaks can make such a difference.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Living separate lives is not going to get you a connected, fun marriage.” Christina Dodson
“We weren’t always there but we chose to stay in the marriage and work through things. It’s worth it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You can continue to grow, but you have to work at it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Check in on your marriage each week with our Weekly Check In Guide to keep your connection strong Creative Questions Bundle
Sign up here to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each episode!
The Sex Talk course equips you to teach your kids about sex in a biblical, God-honoring way
Fri, 07 Jun 2024 - 29min - 749 - 6 Communication Tips for Tough Times | Ep. 618
If your marriage communication is a struggle, you are NOT alone. So many marriage issues come back to communication, and if your communication is awesome, your marriage will be too! But most of us will have some trouble with communicating well with our spouse, and it’s the biggest issue couples ask us for help with. That’s why today we’re equipping you with 6 tips to communicate well in the good times and in the bad.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How to talk so your spouse can listen
Use the “title page” trick to help your spouse listen to you
Dr. Kim’s 6 tips to communicate well
How to find a good counselor if you need one
How to restart the openness & honesty in your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“I think what happens for guys is that when we’re dating our future wife, we up our game.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It’s hard for me to put my thoughts and feelings into succinct words.I can easily ramble on… but that doesn’t make for good communication.” - Lindsay Few
“The bottom line is you want them to hear what you’re saying, so how do you best communicate in a way that they’re going to hear it?” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If you’re going through a hard time, call it that. Work together to reclaim your time and energy.” - Lindsay Few
“We can’t give away every piece of our heart, mind, time and energy to things that drain the life out of us.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each episode by signing up here!
The Sex Talk course equips you to teach your kids about sex in a biblical, God-honoring way
Dr. Kim’s blogs on questions to ask your counselor:
4 Qualities Your Christian Counselor Needs
3 Things A Counselor Needs To Believe to Help Your Marriage
3 Mistakes Couples Make When They Try Counseling
Our FREE Weekly Check In Guide helps with regular communication
Making Your Marriage a Refuge with Special Guest Gary Thomas Ep. 530
Achieving Awesome Communication in Marriage YouVersion Plan
Tue, 04 Jun 2024 - 43min - 748 - Why Things That Don't Matter, Matter Deeply With Charlie & Andi Ashworth | Ep. 617
It often feels like the world around us is too broken. Where would you even start if you wanted to try and fix it? On the podcast today, Charlie and Andi Ashworth answer this question, and thankfully their answer is much simpler and more doable than it might seem.
The Ashworths have spent decades sharing their creative gifts and encouraging others to do the same, and in today’s episode they artfully equip you to take small steps toward creativity, community, and reflecting the light of God’s love, right where you are.
Don’t miss this bonus episode! We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How should Christians engage with culture?
A call for culture making - and how simple it is to actually do it
Why the small things matter - and how to use them for good in your life
Hope for becoming the remedy to the loneliness epidemic
How to balance the desire for creativity and the need to get things done
Battling the dis-integration of “mundane” versus doing things we like
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“We make less and less meaning of everything now, because it’s happening so fast and we’re receiving so much information.” - Charlie Ashworth
“There’s no small people; there’s no small things. Everything matters.” - Charlie Ashworth
“We don’t know the stories that will continue after we do.” - Andi Ashworth
“If all of life matters to God, then all of life matters to us.” - Andi Ashworth
“We want a formula … but it is a process.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Based on your faith in Christ, what kind of culture are you making? Are you contributing good? Or are you contributing negativity?” - Charlie Ashworth
“It’s antithetical to the word of God and to creation itself to think that we as people of God are somehow standing outside of it. It actually creates an ‘us’ versus ‘them’ mentality that is so unhealthy.” - Charlie Ashworth
“Start with where you're at: You're actually getting up and making culture every day.” - Andi Ashworth
“As an artist, maturity looks like a seamless integration of a diversity of creativity over time.” - Charlie Peacock
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Charlie and Andi’s book, Why Everything That Doesn't Matter, Matters So Much: The Way of Love in a World of Hurt
Find more from the Ashworths on their website: https://thewriterthehusband.com/
Andy Crouch’s book Culture Making
Learn 7 reasons why your sex life may not be where you want it to be, and how to get it there! Sign up here for the 9 Ways to Improve Your Sex Life Webinar
Fri, 31 May 2024 - 1h 04min - 747 - How to Heal and Rebuild After Trust is Broken | Ep. 616
Your marriage needs trust in order to be healthy. Without it, your connection with your spouse will fade, and you’ll experience more conflict and tension, and less of the closeness and intimacy marriage is meant to have. Don’t stay stuck like this! Turn things around by closing the trust gaps between you and your spouse and make your marriage a safe refuge for both of you.
Episode highlights include:
Areas where you might not realize you lack trust
How to address it effectively with your spouse - without blaming
How to have grace in the rebuilding process
Tips to building financial trust
Practical tips to become more trustworthy with completing tasks
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Without trust in a marriage, the marriage just crumbles.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We don’t realize how valuable trust is until it’s broken.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Trust can be unique to the person and the situation.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We have to own what’s driving our trust-breaking behavior.” - Lindsay Few
“The budget isn’t a prison, it’s a plan. But sometimes it will be uncomfortable.” - Lindsay Few
“The sooner you go to counseling, the sooner you’ll resolve your issues.” - Lindsay Few
“If you get stuck, you don’t have to stay stuck.” - Lindsay Few
“Your spouse may make some mistakes, so look for Jesus in your spouse.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I felt like he should trust me … but my action was not giving him anything to trust.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Sign up HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode
We are bombarded with negative messages about marriage. FIGHT BACK with our Reframing Challenge
If your marriage has been damaged by porn, the 5 Steps to Healing After Porn Betrayal webinar is a great first step to healing. Learn more or grab your spot here.
Warm Up Your Marriage (Past Episode)
Tue, 28 May 2024 - 45min - 746 - Answering Listener Sex Questions | Ep. 615
Today we answer some of the most frequently asked questions we hear about sex. Dr. Kim and Christina covered this on an episode in 2021, and we’ve distilled their conversation into the most timeless and practical answers to common sex questions.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How often is “normal”?
Dealing with dead sex drive
Is oral sex ok in marriage? What about anal?Is there such thing as too much sex when trying to conceive?
How to start talking to your kids about sex
What do do if your spouse withholds sex
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Guys, you have to continue to be romantic.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I wanted my kids to talk to me about sex before they went to a friend or read it on a bathroom wall or a magazine. You want that door to be open.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You need to honor each other and respect each other’s body to honor God in marriage.” - Christina Dodson
“Guys, if you please your wife first, does it really matter when you orgasm? There's this unspoken pressure.” - Christina Dodson
“There’s always an answer. I’ve never had a couple we couldn’t figure out an answer for.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Stay at the comfort level of the one who is least comfortable. If you do that, you’re going to be ok.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Sign up HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode
Dr. Kim’s Marriage Multiplier is a quick weekly email with actionable insights to grow your marriage. Sign up HERE!
Resources we recommend for starting the sex conversation with your spouse
Resources we recommend for talking to your kids about sex:
Don’t Mom Alone Podcast Ep 328
Full Set - God's Design for Sex Series: Revised and Updated Edition by Stan Jones, Brenna Jones
We’re delighted to partner with The Sex Talk, an excellent online course to help you navigate this topic well
Fri, 24 May 2024 - 38min - 745 - Types of Trust Every Marriage Needs | Ep. 614
Trust in marriage is not one-size-fits all. There are many areas where your marriage needs trust in order to thrive, and some might matter to your spouse more than they do to you, and vice versa. So today we’re talking about how to navigate any trust gaps you may have with your spouse, how to start the conversation about it, and rebuild what’s been broken so you both feel more connected and secure in your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Several types of trust marriages need, and why they matter
The side effects of missing trust
Simple steps to catch a trust slip-up so that trust is not broken
Specific trust-killers you need to avoid
How to build trust - and keep it
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“It helps to build trust if you accept me as I am, not as you wish I would be.” - Lindsay Few
“I may not even be aware if I did something that affected the trust, and I want to know.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If it’s important to her and it keeps coming up, I want her to tell me about it.” Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I’d be so offended when he didn’t trust me, but when I think about the reality, I wasn’t trustworthy.” - Lindsay Few
“Trust is between two people. It’s not just your perception of yourself.” - Lindsay Few
“It’s not like we quit making mistakes, it’s just that we handle them differently now.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
What would happen if you took the next 4 weeks to reframe your spouse and your marriage with a biblical approach? Cultivate a better perspective – and a better marriage, with our Reframing Challenge
Sign up HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode
Does your sex life need a reboot? Improve your sex life with our Locking Lips Kissing Game!
If your marriage has been damaged by porn, the Marriage Undefiled Online Course provides a path to rebuild trust and repair your marriage.
Click HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode!
The free printable Weekly Check Up is a simple way to keep short accounts and keep building trust.
Tue, 21 May 2024 - 35min - 744 - Lust vs Desire: What's the Difference? | Ep. 613
Does lust have a place in marriage? What sets it apart from sexual desire? Today we’re working through the reasons this question matters for your marriage, and how to have a marriage that glorifies God in every aspect, including how you steward your sexual desires.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Defining the difference between lust and desire, biblically
The godly purposes for sexual desire in marriage
Specific reasons why misused sexual desire is destructive
How to maintain purity in marriage
Why porn affects your marriage even if your spouse doesn’t know you use it
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Lust is more about what you see, what you’re attracted to and what it can do for you.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“In the Bible, it’s not like they lived in a Puritanical culture at that time. No, it was probably every bit as bad…we just access things in a different way now.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If we look at Scripture, lust was never mentioned in a positive light.” - Lindsay Few
“We won’t ever clear that bar, but he’s taken care of it through his life, death and resurrection, so there is grace and forgiveness.” - Lindsay Few
“The best sex is within the context of a Christian marriage.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“If it’s reduced to that ‘just get it over with’ kind of situation, whoa. Red flag. The goal is not just to satisfy the urge, the goal is mutual enjoyment, pleasure, connection and building of the marriage.” - Lindsay Few
“Vulnerability is uncomfortable, but it can lead you to prevent something a lot more painful.” - Lindsay Few
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
If your marriage has been damaged by porn, our free 5 Steps to Healing After Porn Betrayal webinar with Dr. Kim is a great first step toward healing
Our Marriage Undefiled Online Course with Matt Cline takes a deeper look at ways to heal and restore your marriage
Sign up HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode
Getting Your Sex Life Off To A Great Start by Cliff & Joyce Penner
The Gift of Sex by Cliff & Joyce Penner
The Best Way to Affair Proof Your Marriage (Past Episode)
Does your sex life need a reboot? Improve your sex life with our Locking Lips Kissing Game!
Tue, 14 May 2024 - 47min - 743 - How to Handle Mismatched Sex Drives in Marriage | Ep. 612
Most couples are not going to be completely aligned with sex drive. There are a lot of factors that can cause this, but there are also a lot of solutions!
Today we want to equip you to have a productive approach to making your sex life the best it can be in marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why is it so hard to have a productive conversation about sex?
Should the lower-drive spouse “just do it” for the spouse’s sake? Why or why not?
Why respecting your wife’s drive level helps her feel sexy
Ways to respect your spouse’s drive
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
What would happen if you took the next 4 weeks to reframe your spouse and your marriage with a biblical approach? Learn how to have a better perspective – and a better marriage, with our Reframing Challenge
Does your sex life need a reboot? Improve your sex life with our Locking Lips Kissing Game!
If your marriage has been damaged by porn, the Marriage Undefiled Online Course provides a path to rebuild trust and repair your marriage.
Click HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode!
Tue, 07 May 2024 - 44min - 742 - Breaking Generational Cycles For a Healthy Marriage with Kristen Hallinan | Ep. 611
Do you hope to break generational patterns of pain? Are childhood hurts haunting your marriage? Today’s guest Kristen Hallinan is a writer and speaker, and today she helps you see how to identify and break generational patterns to find hope, healing and redemption.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How your past trauma can affects your current reactions
What makes it so hard to break cycles
Red flags of unhealthy family dynamics
How to work with God to find his redemption
Steps to making a redemption plan for your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“It can be easy to say, ‘Why didn’t I know better?’ You didn’t know better because that’s all you knew.” - Kristen Hallinan
“The more I’ve gotten to know who God is, the more I understand who I am.”- Kristen Hallinan
“I used to believe if I just tried hard enough, I could grow up and create this perfect family.” - Kristen Hallinan
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Sign up HERE to get the Couple’s Conversation Guide for each week’s new episode
Learn more about how to make your marriage conflict healthy by joining Dr. Kim for the 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar
Dr. Kim recommends the book, The Body Keeps the Score
Grab Kristen’s book, Legacy Changer for more great info on the topic
Follow Kristen on Instagram and check out her website
Tue, 30 Apr 2024 - 39min - 741 - Escaping an Emotionally Abusive Marriage Part 3: Help to Get Out and Get Safe | Ep. 610
Today we are sharing the final episode with Kathy McAtee Young and her story of finding safety after decades in an abusive marriage. In this episode Kathy shares some of the barriers that prevent spouses in abusive marriages from seeking safety and help, ways to begin moving out of the abusive relationship, and the ways healing begins afterward.
Don’t miss the conclusion to Kathy’s story. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Reasons that abused spouse don’t trust their own judgment
Steps to get out of an abusive marriage
Is it ever appropriate to intervene if you believe someone is being abused?
What the process of healing looks like after you get safe
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“One of the hallmarks of an unsafe relationship is confusion.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“God sees you. He cares. And he is faithful.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“We don’t want your pity. Compassion, yes. There is a difference.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“Healing is a lifestyle, not a finish line.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“When you can name it, then you can process it.” - Kathy McAtee Young
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline : 800-799-7233 https://www.thehotline.org/
Visit Kathy’s website to learn about the helpful resources and services she offers
Kathy can also be reached for coaching on Instagram
This previous episode explains a Biblical perspective on abuse
Lies That Keep You With Your Abuser with Dr. David E Clarke | Ep. 541
Thu, 25 Apr 2024 - 48min - 740 - Escaping an Emotionally Abusive Marriage Part 2: Seeking Church Support | Kathy’s Story Ep. 609
Today in Part 2 of Kathy’s story, Kathy shares the ways she sought support from the church when she realized her marriage was in trouble, the responses she received, and the effects that had on her marriage. In this episode Kathy shares why it’s not possible for the abused spouse to end the abuse, and the difference between biblical versus unbiblical advice about abuse.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Interventions the church put in place, and why they were not successful
The wake up moment that turned things around for Kathy
What is an appropriate response to spousal abuse?
The red flags that advice or counsel about abuse is unbiblical
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Red flags that advice or counsel about abuse is unbiblical
They won’t call out that abuse is abuse
They will not call the abuse sin
The safety of the abused spouse is not top priority
There is no call for repentance
They advise you to stay, regardless
Blaming the abused for the abuse
QUOTES
“There is one person responsible for abuse: It is the abuser.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“The Bible definitely commands forgiveness. It does not command reconciliation.” - Kathy McAtee Young
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Contact the National Domestic Violence Hotline : 800-799-7233 https://www.thehotline.org/
Visit Kathy’s website to learn about the helpful resources and services she offers
Kathy can also be reached for coaching on Instagram
This previous episode explains a Biblical perspective on abuse
Lies That Keep You With Your Abuser with Dr. David E Clarke | Ep. 541
Wed, 24 Apr 2024 - 47min - 739 - Escaping an Emotionally Abusive Marriage: Kathy’s Story | Ep. 608
When does an unhealthy marriage become an abusive marriage? Where can you go when you need to get out? In today’s episode we hear part 1 of Kathy’s real marriage story. Kathy shares how she came to believe that divorce was the most God-honoring option in her situation, and how she found safety after 30+ years in an emotionally abusive marriage.
We are so grateful to Kathy for generously sharing her story. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Dispelling myths about who falls into abuse
Why marriage counseling does not work in abusive marriages
How Kathy learned her marriage was abusive
Why she stayed as long as she did, and why she later divorced
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
This previous episode defines a clear Biblical perspective on abuse:
Lies That Keep You With Your Abuser with Dr. David E Clarke | Ep. 541
QUOTES
“I want to debunk the myth that abused women are poorly educated, lower income, women who can easily be taken advantage of. That’s just not accurate.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“Within the first year, I knew we had trouble…” - Kathy McAtee Young
“Marriage counseling does not work if there’s abuse involved. I know that now.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“Most people who are narcissists are really good at it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You have this idea that, ‘If she could fix all these things, then I wouldn’t be this way.’ That’s the blame shifting.” - Kathy McAtee Young
“The heart of abuse is power and control. Everything else is tactics.” - Kathy McAtee Young
Tue, 23 Apr 2024 - 39min - 738 - Ground Rules to Help You Fight Fair & Make Up Well | Ep. 606
Do you fight fair, or do you wish there was a referee to call a stop to the foul play when you argue with your spouse? Ground rules are an important step toward having healthy marriage conflict, so today Dr. Kim will spell out how to make sure you’re fighting fair in your marriage. We want to empower you to fight fair, and resolve issues in a kind and loving way.
If you need help to fight fair and truly resolve issues without making things worse, you will love today’s conversation.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The DOs and DON’Ts of fighting fair
The side effects of unhealthy conflict
A healthy way to “let it all out”
Can honesty go too far? How do you know?
Tips to the reconnection process - how to make up well
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“We both learned we needed to reconnect and apologize, but sometimes we werent’ ready to take that step at the same time. We had to learn that somebody needs to take the step. It doesn’t really matter who started the fight or who was wrong.”
“Taking responsibility is huge. Owning your part in it, even if you think you only did 10%, you still did 10%.”
“What are you sorry for? Be very specific in what you did and why you're taking responsibility.”
“I say it a lot: One of the best gifts you can give your marriage is to learn how to resolve conflict.”
Forgiveness and apologies need to have no strings attached. It’s just that I choose to do this.
We’re not just trying to clear a slate so our spouse stops bugging us. Have you repented before the Lord? That’s where this starts.
We are accountable to Him before being accountable to our spouse. Did I just treat my spouse in the way He would have me treat them? If not, I need to take that up with Him
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
When you really think about it, how did it affect your spouse when you had this conflict?
Repentance. Learning from the mistakes made and committing to work on them together.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more about how to make your marriage conflict healthy by joining Dr. Kim for the 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar
Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is your quick guide to get marriage conflict on the right track.
If you’re ready to learn how to do conflict well, the Conflict Resolution Guide helps you diagnose the problem areas in your marriage, then learn the steps to resolve them.
TODAY is the last day for our 7 Most Popular Resource Bundle! Don’t miss the chance to get 7 of our most-loved resources for 1 donation of ANY amount in support of the ministry of Awesome Marriage! Get all the details here!
Tue, 16 Apr 2024 - 35min - 737 - How to De Escalate Marriage Conflict & Resolve Issues | Ep. 605
Sick of the same old fights over and over with your spouse? Learn to de-escalate marriage fights and resolve issues in a healthy and helpful way. Conflict in marriage is inevitable, but the way you handle it is what matters most. Learning to deal with it well will benefit your marriage in so many ways! Tune in today to learn how.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Common conflict pitfalls to avoid
The problem with “winning” marriage fights
Tips to help you break the fighting cycle
What to do if one spouse is not ready to reconnect
DISCUSSION QUESTIONS:
Are you stuck in a conflict cycle? If so, work together to identify what’s triggering it.
Choose 1 tip from Dr. Kim’s list below that you will both agree to use this week.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“When we try our best to avoid conflict, we’re not really equipping ourselves with the skills to handle it well.” - Lindsay Few
“Awareness gives you some insight that can really be useful.” Dr. Kim Kimberling
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more about how to make your marriage conflict healthy by joining Dr. Kim for the 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair Webinar
Our Conflict Resolution Cheat Sheet is your quick guide to get marriage conflict on the right track.
If you’re ready to learn how to do conflict well, the Conflict Resolution Guide helps you diagnose the problem areas in your marriage, then learn the steps to resolve them.
It’s here! Our 7 Most Popular Resource Bundle is LIVE! That means you can get 7 of our most-loved marriage building resources by making 1 donation of ANY amount to support the ministry of Awesome Marriage! The bundle is available for a limited time only. Get all the details here!
Tue, 09 Apr 2024 - 48min - 736 - Learn to Turn Conflict Into Connection with Dana Che Williams | Ep. 604
Learn how conflict can create a deeper connection between you and your spouse. Today’s special guest, marriage coach Dana Che is very open about the struggles her marriage faced. In today’s episode she shares her marriage story, what got them through, and how you can use the conflict you face in marriage to draw you toward deeper connection.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What we can learn from our conflict triggers
How to deal with different conflict styles in marriage
Steps to break generational cycles in your marriage
The power of speaking life to our spouse and our marriage
How being emotionally unavailable tends to show up in husbands and in wives & what to do about it
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“As a wife, I knew I couldn’t change my husband … but that didn’’ keep me from trying.” Dana Che
“When you actually engage in conflict, you can start to learn more about your spouse, what’s important to them.” -Dana Che
“You’ve got to feed the right things if you want to change the wrong things.” - Dana Che
“Just like you learned that bad behavior, you can unlearn it and learn something new.” Dana Che
“True repentance is visible.” Dana Che
“What we believe, we will begin to speak. What we speak, we will begin to behave.” Dana Che
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
What does your most recent marriage conflict reveal about what’s most valuable to you?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find more from Dana at DanaChe.com, where you can take her “Connection Check” quiz
Listen to the “Real Relationship Talk” podcast
Joining Marriage Changers now means you score a huge haul of marriage-building goods when our annual *7 Most-Popular Resource Bundle* goes live on April 2nd!
Fri, 22 Mar 2024 - 57min - 735 - Should Christians Go To Counseling? With Jason VanRuler | Ep. 603
Why do Christians need counseling? Isn’t the Gospel enough to transform us? We hear these questions fairly often. Today Dr. Kim and special guest Jason VanRuler dive deeper into these questions and the conversation about the role of therapy and counseling in a life devoted to following Jesus.
Don’t miss this helpful conversation! We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How often do clients have no idea that they haven’t gotten past their past?
Unexpected ways your past might be showing up & affecting your marriage today
Updating the negative messages we believe about ourselves
The effect of vulnerability on our marriage connection
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Where there's a disconnect in relationships, it’s often a disconnect from the system we witnessed growing up and what we’re trying to make happen today.” - Jason VanRuler
“When we get comfortable, the old ways seep out to the surface.” - Jason VanRuler
“Every time a client says a negative message about themselves, I ask, is that the message you think God gave you?” - Jason VanRuler
“One of my great joys is working with people to eliminate distractions so they can focus on the truth and live the life God has called them to.”- Jason VanRuler
“If we want to feel connected and we’re not feeling connected, a lot of times that emotional intimacy and depth is the missing link.” - Jason VanRuler
“When we get vulnerable and honest, it attracts intimacy from our partner and we have a different relationship.” - Jason VanRuler
“The marriage we want is often on the other side of vulnerability. We just don’t often know how to get there.”- Jason VanRuler
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Do you recognize any ways you haven’t gotten past your past?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Get Jason’s book, Get Past Your Past
His site: https://www.jasonvr.com/
If you’re ready to heal your marriage from p*rn, join us for the “5 Steps to Healing After P*rn Betrayal” LIVE webinar.
Joining Marriage Changers now means you score a huge haul of marriage-building goods when our annual *7 Most-Popular Resource Bundle* goes live on April 2nd!Tue, 19 Mar 2024 - 43min - 734 - How to Become the Husband You Want to Be with Jim Ramos | Ep. 602
Are you a man living in the stress bubble? It’s when the years of marriage, career building and raising kids all happen at once. You’re figuring everything out, trying to be there for it all, and it. Is. Stressful. If you’re there, you want to hear from a godly dad who has been there.
We’re so happy to share this conversation with Jim Ramos. Jim’s wisdom and experience will equip and encourage you to be the husband and dad you want to be. Don’t miss this episode.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Jim defines the 4 phases of fatherhood
Advice for the dad who never had a role model to guide him
Common mistakes dads make in the “stress bubble” years
Types of provision that the family needs from a husband / father
3 easy things Jim did that he recommends for all couples
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Whether we tell our kids that we’ve made mistakes or not, they’re still noticing. Especially during those teen years.” - Jim Ramos
"Our families require much more than physical provision. The damage most men do has nothing to do with physical provision; it has to do with heart care and soul care.” Jim Ramos
“You don’t have to be flashy. You don't have to be Superman. You just have to show up.” - Jim Ramos
“As men we have to realize our wife is the most important person on the planet, and it’s our job to make one person feel special.” - Jim Ramos
“You will not be remembered for what you did 9-5, you will be remembered for what you did 5-9.” - Jim Ramos
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Jim shared 5 traits that set a “man” apart from a “male”:
- Protect integrity Fight apathy Pursue God passionately Lead courageously Finish strong each day
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find Jim online @ https://meninthearena.org/
On instagram @themeninthearena
Get the book Strong Men Dangerous Times
Listen to the Men in The Arena Podcast
Fri, 15 Mar 2024 - 59min - 733 - 4 More Biblical Prayers to Pray Together to Grow Your Marriage | Ep. 601
Dr. Kim has said that prayer is the #1 most impactful thing you can do for your marriage. Today he explains why that is, and how to make it a habit in your marriage. Today we want to make praying with your spouse more approachable by sharing 4 biblical prayers to pray with your spouse that will grow your marriage.
The Bible lists a lot of reasons for marriage, and praying in line with God’s purpose and intention for marriage is very powerful.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why prayer is an essential act of spiritual protection against the enemy
Why it’s so hard to get started, and how to overcome
Healthy perspective shifts praying will provide in your marriage
How to handle some of the uncomfortable realities of answered prayers
The power of prayer to help you take personal responsibility
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Praying together puts God where he wants to be in our marriage: Right in the center of it. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“The enemy does not want Christian marriages to work.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“When you pray together you find that it unites you.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“There’s a ripple effect: It’s not just about the couple, it’s about the family; it’s about the community.” - Lindsay Few
“I am more of who God created me to be after being married to Nancy all these years than I would have been without her.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“God put us together. He’s got some fun stuff for us to do. Let’s look out and let’s get this stuff going!” - Lindsay Few
Blame is a very human response…but we all have a way we can influence the world. We do have control over how we’re responding to God’s call on us.” - Lindsay Few
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
4 Prayers to Pray together:
Protection from the enemy of our souls That your marriage will sharpen you Pray that your marriage be fruitful That your marriage will be a lightMENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Our 21 Prayers for Building An Awesome Marriage makes it simple to make prayer a regular part of your marriage <3
Find more prayers to grow your marriage in the 7 Prayers YouVersion Bible reading plan
Tue, 12 Mar 2024 - 32min - 732 - 4 Biblical Prayers to Grow You & Your Marriage | Ep. 600
When we pray, it can be tempting to make our prayers a wishlist. But praying in line with God’s word changes things, and today we’re talking about why that matters and how to pray biblically for your marriage. Today Dr. Kim shares 4 prayers that line up with Scripture that you can be praying daily to grow you, and your marriage!
Don’t miss this powerful episode. We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why it matters to pray biblically
What makes a prayer biblical
The risk involved in praying these things, and the reward they provide
How these prayers have impacted Dr. Kim and Nancy’s marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
We’ve probably all heard some things taught, or caught, that were not biblical. We’ve heard ideas like, 'If God loves you, He’ll make you happy,' or 'If you marry the right person, marriage will be easy,' that do not line up with Scripture.”- Lindsay Few
“Trusting him may be the hardest first step for some of us, because we’re not sure what he’ll do.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Sometimes the prayer we want answered is just the thing that’s easiest for us.” - Lindsay Few
“He’s always good, even though we don’t see it at times.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Each of us can be thankful that God knows not only what’s best for us, but for the whole world. We don’t have to be burdened with that. He’s got that.” - Lindsay Few
“If you’re lining up with what God states in his word that He wants to have happen, that’s going to be really powerful.” - Lindsay Few
“We can’t hide anything from God.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Sexual desire is created for a reason. It’s not a secret from God.” - Lindsay Few
4 Prayers to Grow You and Your Marriage:
Pray that God will help you love like Christ loved.
Ask God to search you, know your heart, and reveal any offensive way.
Pray that your desire will be for your spouse only.
Ask God to help you see your spouse as He does.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Make prayer a regular part of your marriage with our 21 Prayers for Building An Awesome Marriage
If your marriage is struggling to recover after infidelity, please check out our Affair Recovery Course. For less than the cost of 2 counseling sessions, this course helps you learn and take the needed steps to healing.
If porn has damaged your marriage, please take advantage of these resources we’ve created just for you:
Dr. Kim’s podcast episode with Matt Cline
Find more prayers to grow your marriage in the 7 Prayers YouVersion Bible reading plan
Tue, 05 Mar 2024 - 34min - 731 - What Does It Mean to Find Intimacy with God? With Faith Eury Cho | Ep. 599
What does it look like to live in intimacy with God each day? We are delighted to have Faith Eury Cho with us today, sharing about what friendship with God means, even in the “wilderness” times in our lives.
Faith is the CEO and founder of the Honor Summit, a gospel preacher, and author of the new book, Experiencing Friendship with God: How the Wilderness Draws Us to His Presence. Faith does a great job de-mystifying this lofty topic, so you don’t want to miss this conversation.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What does “friendship with God” actually mean?
Practical ways to “practice God’s presence,” even if it seems out of reach
How friendship with God impacts marriage
How to grow spiritually with your spouse
Ways to take these concepts into parenting / grandparenting
How to navigate the wilderness seasons of our faith
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Sometimes without even knowing, we believe so that God can give us a better life.” - Faith Eury Cho
“Friendship with God is just intimacy on a day to day level.” Faith Eury Cho
“We need to really redefine what experience actually means. Because if we go into any relationship, any - our spouse, our kids, our friends - having a set agenda of what experiencing that relationship should look like to us, it can be very unhealthy really quick.” - Faith Eury Cho
“Start simple. Start with something that is a natural offshoot to your regular rhythms of life.” - Faith Eury Cho
“I remember moments I would tell God, ‘I don’t have a prayer to pray, I don’t have a song to sing, but I’m here.’” - Faith Eury Cho
“God cares about every little thing, and we want to give him the opportunity to show us that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Some of us are friends with fear, not the presence of God, and I think we’ve got to break up with our fear!” - Faith Eury Cho
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
What is one way you and your spouse like to worship God together?
Have you seen God move during a ‘wilderness’ season?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find Faith on Instagram or at her website, www.faitheurycho.com
Grab Faith’s book, Experiencing Friendship with God: How the Wilderness Draws Us to His Presence.
Our 2 Week Couples Scripture Challenge is a practical tool to help you get in the Word with your spouse each day. Find out more here!
Our House Prayer Cards are one of our best-loved resources, making it simple to use mundane moments for godly purpose in your home. Learn more HERE!
If you’d like to get each of our monthly marriage resources delivered directly to your inbox, while also supporting the non-profit ministry of Awesome Marriage, it’s time to become a Marriage Changer! Get all the details here.
Tue, 27 Feb 2024 - 48min - 730 - How to Make Romance Realistic in Your Marriage | Ep. 598
How’s the romance in your marriage? How does it compare to when you were dating? (… and does that matter?)
Romance can fall by the wayside in marriage because it seems like an “extra” that you’ll get around to when you have extra time or money, or if you feel inspired to make a grand gesture.
But today Dr. Kim shares several reasons NOT to let that be the case in your marriage. Listen to learn why you need to bring the romance back and HOW to realistically make that happen.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Dr. Kim shares specific ways romance benefits a marriage
What does romance look like for men vs. for women?
What to do if you’re just not feeling it
Whose job is it to make sure the romance is good?
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Most people would say at some point it was there. So how do you get it back?” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We kind of quit doing romantic things because we’re not feeling it. Sometimes we have to go ahead and do them, so that we feel it again.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Marriage is a lot better when you’ve got romance in it.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I think we’d like it to come naturally, like it does in the movies
“It’s ok to have the conversation. We have to get past the mindset of, ‘If you really loved me, you’d know.’” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Romance is a great way to show your spouse, I see you, I appreciate you, and I care about what you care about.” Lindsay Few
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Have you talked about romance with your spouse?
Ask them: What is sexy to you? What is romantic to you?
Don’t judge their answers!
Answers may change over time, so check in every now and then.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
- The ❤️🔥Sexy Bundle❤️helps bring the romance riiight on home! Get all the details about this limited time Bundle HERE!
Tue, 20 Feb 2024 - 32min - 729 - Why Your Everyday Work Matters for Eternity with Jordan Raynor | Ep. 597
Whether you love it or hate it, you spend the majority of your waking hours doing it. And as today’s guest tells us, it’s mentioned over 800 times in the Bible: We’re talking about work.
That’s why we’re so pleased to have Jordan Raynor join us on the podcast today to talk about how your work matters to God - today, every day of your life, and for eternity. This conversation will leave you inspired and encouraged to engage well with the word God is calling you to do, every single day.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
3 ways your everyday work matters for eternity
Why Jordan advocates for making an “Anti-Bucket List”
The Biblical truths of Heaven & Eternity that NO ONE is talking about
The “abridged Gospel” that most of us believe & the implications we miss if we do
The practical ways these deep biblical truths will impact your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“When we understand what God’s word has to say about work, it frees us up to be exceptional both at work and at home.” - Jordan Raynor
“While God’s word is clear that our labor in the Lord is not in vain, it also makes clear that GOd doesn’t need you or me - His purposes will not be thwarted. He does not need us, he wants us.” - Jordan Raynor
“I can be at peace walking away from my work at the end of the day … because I know that if the things on my to - do list are on God’s to - do list, he’s going to complete them with or without me. That’s terrifically freeing.” - Jordan Raynor
“Scripture mentions work more than 800 times. There’s no need to doubt whether or not God cares about your work.” - Jordan Raynor
“When you understand that 100% of your time at home and at work matters to God, you become fully alive. And this world is desperate to see people that are fully alive.” Jordan
“I went to Christian school for 13 years. And I remember frequently sitting in chapel, and quietly dreading the thought of heaven.
“We are called to keep watch for Christ’s return, not by sitting on our hands and waiting for heaven to drop from the sky, but by working with our hands and joining him in cultivating heaven on earth today.” - Jordan Raynor
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
How does the Biblical idea of stewarding your time change your daily work life?
Fri, 16 Feb 2024 - 44min - 728 - Tips to Master Work - Life Balance in Your Marriage In The Home | Ep. 596
Work - life balance is not limited to the workplace: It’s also the work of running a home, and it’s a challenge for most couples to share this load well. Today Dr. Kim is sharing some of his best tips for finding balance in the home.
The struggle to find work - life balance does not end when you get home in the evening. Taking care of a home and family is a huge portion of our workload that you can’t ignore. But you can find ways to handle it well – TOGETHER!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Tips for spouses who work outside the home
Tips for those who work from home
Tips for stay-at-home parents
Signs you & your spouse need to work toward better balance
The need for boundaries to help with balance; how to work on them together
What to do if you get stuck, or if you’ve tried to address things and it’s not working
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
Resolving conflict doesn’t have to be a bad thing. It takes work, but when you talk and listen well, you’ll find that most things, you can resolve. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
At the end of your life, you’re not going to look back and say, “I wish I’d looked at my phone a few more times.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
If you get stuck, it’s ok to get help. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
The things that matter work themselves out in the very small details of life. - Lindsay Few
Maybe you think everyone else is doing it all, so you’re trying to do it all. I don’t think that’s realistic or healthy. - Lindsay Few
It’s easy to fall in those traps and not really know that you’ve even fallen into them. - Dr. Kim Kimberling
We have to make sure we’re saying what we mean and what we need instead of just hoping our spouse catches the hint. - Lindsay few
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Is the workload in your home balanced?
Do you have a mentor couple in your life?
Are your boundaries with tech (screentime, phones) working well?
Talk with your spouse and rate how you’re doing with work / life balance together, on a scale of 1-10?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Get all the details about our limited time Sexy Bundle HERE
Team You & Me
For more help with setting healthy boundaries, listen to our Boundaries Series:
Boundaries For Your Marriage: What They Are and Why They Are Important | Ep. 544
Boundaries Within Your Marriage | Ep. 546
Boundaries Outside Your Marriage | Ep. 547
How to Set Marriage Boundaries | Ep. 548
Boundaries & Marriage: What NOT to Do | Ep. 550
Real Stories of Healthy Marriage Boundaries | Ep. 551
Tue, 13 Feb 2024 - 41min - 727 - Mastering Work - Life Balance in the Workplace | Ep. 595
Practically speaking, balance is hard to find, and even harder to maintain. While work-life balance is a very common issue, it IS possible to alleviate unnecessary stress and find better balance.
In today’s episode Dr Kim will share practical tips to help you find that balance. Dr. Kim shares some of the common pain points that he sees couples facing, and some of the best ways he’s seen to deal with those.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Tips to help you handle the stress between spouses so that your marriage tension doesn’t add onto the stress of work-life balance
Some early signs of burnout you cannot afford to ignore
The importance of making peace with imperfection
Helpful perspective tips for both career and extracurricular commitments
Practical tips for work-from-home balance
Subscribe to Podcast Email to make sure you never miss an episode. When you sign up, you will get our 4 Week Connection Challenge for free! Plus you will get noteworthy quotes, resources, and more delivered straight to your inbox.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“I was saying no to my family a lot because I was saying yes to all these other things.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Figure out who you are, who you’re working for, what do you really want, and what do you need to get there. Sometimes we get on that treadmill and we just keep going.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I think it is changing, but there’s still a culture that glorifies overwork, burnout and hustle. It can be hard to step out of that because it feels important to be in it.” - Lindsay Few
“We have a God that is bigger than my mistakes and imperfections. If I really think the world depends on me being perfect, then I’ve got a problem.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“You don’t just get balanced and stay balanced forever. It’s a constant work in progress.” - Lindsay Few
“We look around and everyone’s dealing with this, so we just think this is normal. If something has resonated with you, it’s okay to acknowledge that you want things to go better.” - Lindsay Few
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
4 reflection questions to help you move forward: What worked, what do I want to do more of, what didn’t work, what do I want to do less of?
God wants you to thrive. Trust that when you seek these answers, He will answer.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
We mentioned this podcast episode with Gary Thomas
Get all the details about our limited time Sexy Bundle HERE
Learn more about what makes expectations healthy in “Unpack Your Expectations, Unfrustrate Your Life” and try a week of Online Women’s Bible Study, FREE!
Tue, 06 Feb 2024 - 39min - 726 - How to Cultivate a Family Culture You Love to Live In with Don & Suzanne Manning | | Ep. 594
Does your home echo with the sounds of sibling squabbles?
Do you wish for more connection with your kids?
If so, today’s episode is for you! Don & Suzanne Manning, the founders of Crazy Cool Family, are passionate about equipping Christian families with strategies to cultivate a family culture they ALL enjoy living with!
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Effective ways to protect kids from screen & tech temptations
Where to invest your time and energy for the best parenting outcomes - and where NOT to
The goal of disciplining our kids and how to work toward it
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Don’t look at the outside and all the fearful things - don't waste your time and energy there: You’re going after your kids’ heart.” - Suzanne Manning
“Kids are wired to want us on their team. They want our input. ” - Suzanne Manning
“Control is based in fear, and connection is based in love.” - Don Manning
“Most people try to control, because we don’t know what to do. But it doesn’t work.” Dr Kim Kimberling
“We never tell parents they need to work harder. They need to work differently. Becoming an encourager and being a listener are two ways to do that.” - Don Manning
“Our children are going to go where the encouragement is.” - Suzanne Manning
“Because of technology and culture, connection today is more important than it’s ever been.” - Don Manning
“The goal of discipline is self-control. When situations come up, they are opportunities to build self control in my kids. Opportunities to build them up for the next stage of life.” - Don Manning
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Do you lean more toward connection, or control?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find more resources and info from Don & Suzanne at CrazyCoolFamily.com
Listen to the Crazy Cool Family Podcast
Reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding of your spouse, AND strengthen your bond as a couple with THIS: Our 30-Day Communication Challenge!
Need more communication help? Sign up here to save your spot for Dr. Kim’s FREE webinar, “7 Common Communication Mistakes Couples Make”
Questions about gaslighting, narcissism and blame? Submit them anonymously HERE or DM us on Instagram. Dr. Kim will answer them in an upcoming episode
Tue, 30 Jan 2024 - 59min - 725 - How Having a Healthier Body Image Makes Your Marriage Healthier with Brittany Braswell | Ep. 591
Are you uncertain with your food choices or unhappy with your body? Is it possible to truly be at peace with food and your body? If you’re not comfortable with your body, this will spill over into your marriage. Gaining a biblical perspective with this will help you heal your relationship with your body and food choices, and in turn, your marriage.
Today we are delighted to have Brittany Braswell joining us to tackle these personal and often painful topics, and share hope, help, and Biblical perspective on these topics. Brittany is a Registered Dietician, Christian speaker and host of the Joy-Filled Eater Podcast, and a wealth of wisdom and encouragement on navigating these challenging topics.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What does Scripture actually say about body image?
How our view of our body impacts our marriage
Brittany’s 1st priority for her clients’ nutrition – this might surprise you!
Tips to handle food choices if you and your spouse are not on the same page
Ways to support your spouse if they are struggling in this area
Ways to ask for your spouse’s support if you’re struggling in this area
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“So much of it is our perception: If I see my body negatively, then I’m assuming my spouse does too.” - Brittany Braswell
“So much of the conversation around body image is very me-centric, not Christ centric.” - Brittany Braswell“The Lord blessed us with this variety of flavors and gave us taste buds to be able to enjoy them!” - Brittany Braswell
“It’s ok to ask for help. You don’t have to meet a certain criteria to deserve some support.” - Brittany Braswell
“We can eat in a way that helps our bodies to thrive so that our bodies don’t become the thing that holds us back from fulfilling the calling and purpose God has placed on our lives.” - Brittany Braswell
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
If it’s hard for you to believe it when your spouse says they are attracted to you, dig a little deeper: Why is it hard to believe?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
For more wisdom on these topics, listen to Brittany’s podcast, The Joy Filled Eater
Here’s the episode on gluttony she mentioned in today’s conversation with Dr. Kim
Find Free Resources as well as coaching, courses & community on Brittanys’ website BrittanyBraswellRD.com
Facebook Support Group: Food Freedom and Body Image Support for Christian Women
Follow her on Instagram
Fri, 26 Jan 2024 - 1h 05min - 724 - The Top 3 Communication Mistakes Couples Make & How to Avoid Them | Ep. 592
If you want to avoid communication breakdowns in your marriage, today’s episode is for you!
Today, Dr. Kim is going to share 3 very common mistakes he sees as he counsels couples, so that you can avoid them! Whether you need a total overhaul or just a few friendly reminders, today’s episode has practical, actionable advice that will help you improve the communication in your marriage.
Are you making the same mistakes most couples make with communication? Dr. Kim has pretty much seen it all, and today he is going to help you avoid those mistakes, and build better communication instead.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
3 of the most common mistakes Dr. Kim sees over and over with couples he counsels: Blame, discounting, and distraction.
The impact each of these mistakes has on a spouse and marriage
The practical steps to avoid each of these communication pitfalls
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
When you resolve conflict, both of you have to take responsibility for your part in it. I’ve never seen an issue where 1 person was 100% responsible. - Dr. Kim
I think it’s easy for us to rationalize, fool ourselves, and take the time to think it through. - Dr. Kim
I’ve done it, I’ve seen it in other wives: It’s easy for us in parenting to discount our husband’s opinion. - Lindsay
Listen in a way that you can let them know you heard what they said. - Dr. Kim
As a parent with kids in the home, it’s great to have the reminder that they are benefitting from us putting boundaries that let us have an adult relationship with our spouse. As important as they are to us, we should value showing them that solid foundation and modeling marriage for them. - Lindsay
I identify with all three of these, I’ve done them all. I’ts not something you just get right then coast, you have to stay on top of it. - Dr. Kim
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Do you use “I” statements to communicate what you need with your spouse?
For example: Instead of, “You always ignore me when I’m talking,” say, “I feel hurt when you scroll on your phone when I’m talking. I want to know that you care about what I have to say.”
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Need more communication help? Sign up here to save your spot for Dr. Kim’s FREE webinar, “7 Common Communication Mistakes Couples Make”
Questions about gaslighting, narcissism and blame? Submit them anonymously HERE or DM us on Instagram. Dr. Kim will answer them in an upcoming episode
Want to reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding of your spouse, OR just strengthen your bond as a couple? Our 30-Day Communication Challenge is for you!
With Dr. Kim’s One Thing email, you’ll get one practical tip each weekday to build your marriage.
The Marriage Multiplier is a quick weekly email that gives you practical ways to be intentional to grow your marriage. Sign up HERE!
Tue, 23 Jan 2024 - 34min - 723 - Andy and Sara's Marriage Recovery Story | Ep. 591
While their life appeared to be successful, fun and amazing, Andy and Sara’s marriage was at a breaking point. Their life was at a high point, but their relationship had reached a low. In today’s episode they share how their marriage recovered.
Can a marriage survive the damage of gaslighting and blame? Today’s episode is proof it can. Dr. Kim got to witness a complete transformation in Andy and Sara’s marriage. Their story is full of grace and hope, and we are so thankful to them for sharing it with us today.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How did things look good from the outside for as long as they did?
How Sara used waiting to grow closer to God
The turning point that allowed Andy to start to change
The specific process that changed Andy from the inside out
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“We lived this big, giant, amazing life. The problem was, I was getting wrapped more and more into my success, thinking I was this great gift to humanity.” - Andy
“I felt like he didn’t know me. He didn’t know my heart.” - Sara
“I was searching for the world to fill that void in my chest that only God can fill.” - Andy
“You need to meditate and delight in the word of God to change the trajectory of your life.” Pastor Mike (via Andy)
“The Lord didn’t care about all my success. He wanted me broken at the foot of the cross.” - Andy
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
How have you seen God show up in the midst of difficult times?What are the little things your spouse does that make you feel loved?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Questions about gaslighting and blame? Submit them anonymously HERE or over on Instagram for Dr. Kim to answer in an upcoming episode
Want to reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding of your spouse, OR just strengthen your bond as a couple? Our 30-Day Communication Challenge is for you!
Tue, 16 Jan 2024 - 1h 06min - 722 - How to Handle Faith Disagreement in Marriage | Ep. 590
Your faith is a foundation for every aspect of life. So when you’re not on the same page with your spouse spiritually, it can make marriage more complicated.
Dr. Kim has helped couples deal with this situation time and time again, and in today’s episode he shares valuable insight into how you can deal with spiritual disunity in your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Practical ways to pursue unity when you’re not unified on faith
The common mistakes Dr. Kim sees spouses make in this situation
The major shift your marriage needs to start thriving
How to change your focus in order to enjoy your marriage
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“God loves them, and knows them so much better than you do, and He knows what works and doesn’t work for that person.” Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Just accepting your spouse and not trying to change them is essential. You can’t really have a thriving marriage until you make that shift.” - Lindsay Few
“Growth hurts, but I’m glad I’m not the same as I was.” - Lindsay Few
“My life is so much different and better because I married Nancy, even though some of it was so hard for both of us.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
QUESTIONS FOR YOU
Have you let go of trying to change your spouse, and let God take over that job?
Pray and ask God: How can I love my spouse well today?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
When your marriage is struggling, everything feels more overwhelming. We created 21 Prayers for Struggling Marriage to help make praying for your marriage less challenging. God is the one who can change your hearts and your marriage for the better, so inviting him to do those things is the best thing you can do for your marriage.
Do you want to reduce unnecessary arguments, decrease stress in your home, develop better understanding & connection with your spouse, or strengthen your bond as a couple? If you do, then our 30-Day Communication Challenge is for you!
Tue, 09 Jan 2024 - 46min - 721 - How To NOT Fight With Your Spouse About Money with Julie Baumgardner | Ep. 589
No one loves talking finances, but we do think you’ll love today’s conversation with Julie Baumgardner! Julie shares how to get curious about what money means to your spouse, how two spouses’ separate financial backgrounds and “money stories” can stop being a source of tension, and start becoming a shared value.
Listen to this episode if you’re ready to get on the same page with your spouse about finances this season - without fighting about them!
Episode highlights include:
Questions to start a productive conversation about finances with your spouse
How to uncover the hidden money lessons you learned growing up, then to get on the same page with your spouse.
What recent research says about the connection of money and marital happiness
How to learn more about your spouse’s perspective about money
Ways to work together toward shared values around money in your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES:
“You have different perspectives about money. You don’t necessarily talk about what it means to you, how you think about it, therefore you argue about it.” - Julie Baumgardner
“You can have conversations about money without having to be methodical about every single penny.” - Julie Baumgardner
“If you can’t figure out how to live within your means with a little, it will be very complicated to figure out how to live within your means with a lot.” - Julie Baumgardner
“It isn’t ‘You’re right, I’m wrong,’ you’re being curious. And in being curious, you’re learning.” - Julie Baumgardner
“If you can tell that money is creating stress, what is it about money that’s stressful?” - Julie Baumgardner
“Keep your eyes wide open for where God is calling you to join Him in his work. Be aware, and where you see a need, be a Kingdom builder. ” - Julie Baumgardner
QUESTIONS FOR YOU:
What matters most to the two of you when it comes to money? It’s never too late to define your core values around money in your marriage.
What is it about money that’s stressful? If it’s “what ifs," then name the what-ifs and talk through them.
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
We found Julie’s article on this topic SO helpful: Do finances in childhood impact your marriage? Research says yesWinshape Marriage online and on Instagram
Find the Money Habitudes game online
🎉 Giveaway time! We are giving away a bundle of our TOP 3 RESOURCES of 2023: 44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage, 21 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and 21 Day Wife Appreciation Challenge! To enter just leave an honest review of the podcast wherever you listen, screenshot it, send in to info@awesomemarriage.com. Giveaway ends 12/15 10am CST.
Dr. Kim’s newest book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half is now available as an eBook! Grab your copy here!
We want to help you make 2024 your best married year yet with 12 Marriage Resolutions for the New Year! Click though for all the details of this uplifting resource!Tue, 12 Dec 2023 - 1h 06min - 720 - Parenting Without Fear of the Teen Years with Kristen Hatton | Ep. 588
Is it possible to parent without fear of the teen years? We say yes! So does today’s guest, Kristen Hatton. We are delighted to have Kristen on the podcast today to share how to prepare for some of the aspects of parenting teens that many parents find daunting.
Episode highlights include:
Kristen shares ways to know if your fears are becoming idols in parenting
Proactive VS reactive parenting: Which one are you?
The difference between overparenting and underparenting and how they affect your kids
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“Frequently parents are living in “reactive” mode, and often it’s because we’re just so busy.” - Kristen Hatton
“If I always say yes to my kids going in different directions with their friends, or being on a travel team, and we’re always just so busy, then all the sudden, church goes by the wayside. Family time goes by the wayside." - Kristen Hatton
“Often, what children experience from their parents is how they view God. So I want them to know my unconditional love and acceptance, so that they see that that’s how God is too.” - Kristen Hatton
QUESTIONS:
To evaluate if something you love has become an idol: Are you holding it with an open palm, or a clenched fist? Can you be OK without it?
Evaluate your emotions to help you see your idols. Ask: Why am I so angry? Why am I so irritable? Is something controlling me? What occupies my time, habits, thoughts, money, and conversations?
Talk with your spouse to decide:
What do we want most for our family? How are we doing to get there?
What do we want to impart to our kids?
What will we allow? What won’t we allow?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Learn more from Kristen:
Follow her @RedemptiveParenting on Instagram
Find all of her books and resources at KristenHatton.com
Get Biblical wisdom for parenting teens in her book Parenting Ahead
Our FREE 16 Ways To Navigate the Teenage Years as a Team will help you keep your marriage strong during this season.GIVEAWAY TIME! We are giving away a bundle of our TOP 3 RESOURCES of 2023: 44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage, 21 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and 21 Day Wife Appreciation Challenge! To enter just leave an honest review of the podcast wherever you listen, screenshot it, send in to info@awesomemarriage.com. Giveaway ends 12/15 10am CST.
Dr. Kim’s newest book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half is now available as an eBook! Grab your copy here!
We want to help you make 2024 your best married year yet with 12 Marriage Resolutions for the New Year! Click though for all the details of this uplifting resource!Fri, 08 Dec 2023 - 50min - 719 - 5 Ways To Prioritize Your Marriage During The Holiday Season | Ep. 587
Holiday season is upon us, and with it all things festive! I’m guessing your schedule didn’t have much extra space to begin with, so now there’s a risk of becoming truly overbooked. How can your marriage be a priority, even with so much going on?
Today Dr. Kim is sharing several of his best tips for prioritizing your marriage, even in this busy season.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Ways to share the load of holiday tasks & preparation better
How prioritizing your marriage this season can decrease your stress
Dr. Kim’s 5 ways to prioritize your marriage this season
How to implement this if you aren’t on the same page right now
Tips to de-stress your holiday gatherings and enjoy them more
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES:
“It doesn’t have to be a whole evening, it doesn’t even have to be a whole hour. It can be just 15 minutes, but you protect that time.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I think quality time is one of the most important things we do in a marriage, and it also seems to be one of the easiest to bump.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Make sure you're on the same page together, then enjoy it together.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“There’s so much unnecessary tension you can eliminate if you can start to use team language and work together.” - Lindsay Few
QUESTIONS
What is one favorite Christmas tradition you and your spouse have, just for the two of you?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
GIVEAWAY TIME! We are giving away a bundle of our Top 3 Resources of 2023: Our 44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage, 21 Day Husband Encouragement Challenge, and 21 Day Wife Appreciation Challenge! To enter just leave an honest review of the podcast wherever you listen, screenshot it, send in to info@awesomemarriage.com. Giveaway ends 12/15 10am EST.
Dr. Kim’s newest book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half is now available as an eBook! Grab your copy here!
Related episode: “What is team Language? Ep. 501”
Tue, 05 Dec 2023 - 41min - 718 - Mind Your Marriage: How To Create Margin In Marriage | Ep. 585
You can reduce the stress and conflict in your marriage simply by creating margin. Today’s episode unpacks several practical ways to create margin in your marriage. Scripture demonstrates how essential a healthy mindset is, so all month we’re getting practical about how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage. Tune into today’s episode to learn how to create margin in your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful for you and your marriage!
Episode highlights include:
The practice Dr. Kim recommends to help you build margin into your marriage and the free resource we offer to make this simple to do
Mindset shifts to help you find margin
Practical ways to prioritize your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“It’s not just carving out more time for each other, it’s how you use that time.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“We talk about your home and marriage being a refuge. You want to create that.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It’s worth the effort to get intentional about this and get on the same page, so you can tackle it as a team.” Lindsay Few
“Learning to really listen makes a big difference. There’s so much value to feeling heard, and knowing that your spouse cares to really listen.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“One thing that really helped us is when we realized we were not each other’s enemy.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“Be ok with being counter cultural if that’s what’s best for your family and your marriage.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
QUESTIONS:
How can you and your spouse work together to create more margin in your marriage?
How can you work together to create a culture of grace in your marriage?
What do you really want for your marriage? What do you need to say no to in this season to make that happen?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Contentment doesn’t come easily, but is more than worth the effort. Take the steps to grow your contentment with our 15-Day Contentment Challenge! It’s yours for a donation of ANY amount to the ministry of Awesome Marriage this Giving Tuesday!
Dr. Kim highly recommends a Weekly Check In for every couple – so to make this simple for you, we have created a Weekly Marriage Check In Guide. You can snag this resource for free when you sign up for the One Thing to Grow Your Marriage email series!
We really enjoyed the book “Ruthless Elimination of Hurry” mentioned in today’s episode
Tue, 28 Nov 2023 - 38min - 717 - Become a Better Gift-Giver This Christmas with Patrick Kucharson | Ep. 585
Cut the stress out of gift giving this Christmas. If shopping for your spouse (and anyone else on your list) feels daunting, this episode is for you. In this episode Patrick Kucharson, the Better Gift Coach, shares how to give gifts that will resonate with their recipients, strategies to become a better gift-giver, and great gift tips for any budget (including free!).
Tune in to learn more!
Episode highlights include:
Simple strategies to know what they really want
Why you need to make brainstorming gift ideas a team sport - and who to recruit to your team
The categories of not-so-good gifts you do not want to fall into this Christmas!
Patrick’s Golden Rule of Gift-Giving
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“How much thought you put into a gift doesn’t necessarily translate into the value the gift recipient will assign to it.” - Patrick Kucharson
“Give gifts that you know they want to receive, over gifts that you want to give.” - Patrick Kucharson
“It’s showing that you appreciate them. You’re listening.” - Patrick Kucharson
“A shortcut for gift-giving: Look around, take note of the negatives, and try to give gifts that will remove them.” - Patrick Kucharson
QUESTIONS:
What’s your favorite gift you’ve given your spouse, and what made it great?
Who can you recruit to your “gift brainstorming team” this season?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Patrick’s Better Gift Coach free weekly email is every bit as entertaining and insightful Patrick was on today’s podcast! Sign up HERE!
You can also find him on Instagram
In the midst of all the gift talk, take time to look for something only God can give: Contentment. Grad our 15-Day Contentment Challenge with your donation of ANY amount and pursue true contentment.
Fri, 24 Nov 2023 - 44min - 716 - Mind Your Marriage: Harness The Power of Gratitude | Ep. 584
Gratitude is a powerful mindset – it affects our mind, our marriage, even our physical health!
Scripture is clear that our mindset is very important, so this month we’re digging into how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage.
Today we’re talking about the power of gratitude. What makes this trait so important, and how can we cultivate it? Tune in for all the details!
Episode highlights include:
Dr. Kim and Lindsay share how gratitude helped them each deal with depression
The way gratitude helps your marriage and your outlook on life
Why growing in gratitude actually ends up leading to – more gratitude!
Practical ways to cultivate gratitude in every day
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
QUOTES
“I think we’re wired to give thanks and be grateful to God.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“When we acknowledge on a regular basis what we’re thankful for, we tend to be happier and less depressed.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“It’s looking at what’s actually happening in my life. What is God doing? What is here today? It brings you back into the present.”- Lindsay Few
“I think the more we acknowledge who He is in our lives and worship him for that, that goes a long way to changing our gratitude.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I don't think God put us together to grumble for 50 years. I think He put us together to grow, to learn, and to be grateful.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
“I think it helps us to serve our spouse and serve our God better when our frame of mind is healthier. And I think gratitude makes it healthier.” - Dr. Kim Kimberling
QUESTIONS
So many things in the world are out of our control, but God IS in control. What is 1 reason you are thankful that He is in control today?
When you think something good about your spouse, say it! What do you appreciate about your spouse?
What is 1 thing you can do to be more present with your spouse today?
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Contentment doesn’t come easily, but is more than worth the effort! Grab our 15-Day Contentment Challenge with a donation of ANY amount to the ministry of Awesome Marriage this Giving Tuesday! LEARN MORE HERE!
The 27 Scripture Prayer Cards resource is a beautiful way to remember scripture and to bring the power of prayer into your marriage each day!
It’s the perfect time to sign up for Dr. Kim’s daily One Thing to Grow Your Marriage email series, since this week’s emails give you simple ways to practice gratitude with your spouse
Tue, 21 Nov 2023 - 38min - 715 - Mind Your Marriage: Learn to Break Free From Blame | Ep. 583
Has blame crept into your marriage? If so, your marriage is certainly suffering its effects. But it does not have to stay that way! Today Dr. Kim helps you discover how to identify and remove this damaging habit from your marriage.
Scripture is clear that our mindset matters, and that we have the ability to change our minds! So this month we’re digging into how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage. Dig in today to start dismantling the blame.
Episode highlights include:
How to identify - and break - subtle blame patterns
Why expecting each spouse to give their 50% share to the marriage just doesn’t add up
Dr. Kim and Lindsay get real about how blame has impacted their marriages
How to remove blame from our efforts to show our spouse love
How to address the issue healthily instead
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Dr. Kim mentioned this article from Harvard Health in the episode
Contentment doesn’t come easily, but it’s SO worth the work! Get our 15-Day Contentment Challenge with a donation of ANY amount to the ministry of Awesome Marriage this Giving Tuesday! Learn more here!
15 Daily Prayers Bundle
More mindset resources:
Dr. Kim’s Mind Craft Plan
Switch On Your Brain by Dr. Leaf (includes the “21-Day Brain Detox”)
Tue, 14 Nov 2023 - 37min - 714 - Dealing Well With Deployment with Jen McDonald | Ep. 582
Calling all military spouses AND frequent travelers: Do not miss this bonus episode! Today we’re thrilled to have Jen McDonald of Milspouse Matters join us on the podcast. Jen is full of wisdom and warmth as well as practical tips and advice on how to weather a marriage separated by distance and the unique challenges of military life. Tune in and be encouraged by her story!
Episode highlights include:
The parts of military life that Jen was NOT prepared for
The realities of deployment and reintegration
Practical things that helped her marriage stay connected during deployment
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find Jen on Facebook, Instagram and on Twitter (X)
Get Jen’s Amazon bestselling book: You Are Not Alone: Encouragement for the Heart of a Military Spouse
And her new book Milspouse Matters: Sharing Strength Through Our Stories
She also has several Military Spouse Resources on her site (including the The 5-Day Deployment Devotional and deployment resources for families and kids). Jen has graciously offered our listeners 10% off when you use the code marriage10 at checkout! (Discount available through 12/31/23.)
Resources for kids / families:
The Comfort Crew for Military Kids
Military Child Education Coalition
Military OneSource (info and support for families)
Military and Family Life Counseling Program (free!)
Fri, 10 Nov 2023 - 46min - 713 - Mind Your Marriage: "Reframing" Explained & How to Know If You Need It | Ep. 581
What does it mean to “reframe?” And how can you know if you need to do it? Reframing is a term Dr. Kim has used in past episodes, and today we learn exactly what it means and the practical steps to do it.
Scripture is clear that our mindset is very important, so this month we’re digging into how to cultivate a healthy mindset and a healthy marriage. Tune into today’s episode for the details!
Episode highlights include:
The Biblical basis and Scripture to support the concept of reframing
Practical steps of the reframing process
What to do if your spouse frames you negatively
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Dr. Kim’s Mind Craft Plan (I accidentally referred to it as Mind Your Marriage in the episode) is a great place to start!
Caroline Leaf’s book, Switch On Your Brain includes the “21-Day Brain Detox” Dr. Kim mentioned in the episode
The Weekly Marriage Check In is a great way to stay connected with your spouse, and you get this printable resource FREE when you sign up for the One Thing email! Get all the details here.
Being self-aware is a gift to your marriage, yourself and everyone around you! Our Self Check In Guide is a tool to take you through the process of growing self-aware.
Dr. Kim mentioned our Marriage Changers Membership, where he and Nancy share exclusive video content each month. Marriage Changers also get automatic access to each new monthly resource we create. Learn more here.
Scripture references:
Romans 12:2
Proverbs 4:23
1 Corinthians 2:16
Romans 8:6
Tue, 07 Nov 2023 - 40min - 712 - Crack the Code to Better Connection In Your Marriage with Dr. Glen & Phyllis Hill | Ep. 580
You know that moment when things go quickly from okay to “What just happened?” in your marriage? Suddenly there’s tension and you’re totally disconnected.
Today, we are so happy to have Dr. Glenn and Phyllis Hill join us on the podcast. They do a great job explaining what goes wrong in that moment, and how to prevent it from happening again. Tune in to learn more!
Episode highlights include:
The shift that completely changed how they approached conflict
The 1 question to stop asking in fights and the better 1 to ask instead
The Hills unpack what it means that identity is the #1 human need, and how that plays out in marriage
A practical tool to easily learn how to emotions well together
How disconnection can affect family life and strategies to handle it
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find more from Dr. Glenn and Phyllis at their website: https://www.connectioncodes.co/ and make sure to use the code AWESOME20 for 20% off any of their classes!
Learn more about using this process to connect in their book: The Connection Codes or on The Connection Codes Podcast!
Download your free copy of the Hill’s Core Emotion Wheel!
You are invited to Dr. Kim’s free webinar, 8 Guidelines for Fighting Fair in Your Marriage. Get all the details HERE
Tue, 31 Oct 2023 - 59min - 711 - God's Design For Sex: Why Does A Gospel View Matter? with Joshua Ryan Butler | Ep. 579
We’re so used to seeing sex allll around us - skin sells, after all! But today, Joshua Ryan Butler shows us how we are still likely to miss so much of what sex is designed to show us. Sex is everywhere – except being talked about by the married couples who are (hopefully!) having it, and the churches and families who desperately need a robust theology of God’s purpose for sex and sexuality.
Today’s episode takes a look at why sex is so much more than right / wrong or rules, and why that truth is incredibly freeing. Tune in to learn more.
Episode highlights include:
Why does it matter what we believe about God’s purpose for sex?
How to unpack the tension between what culture says vs church says about sex
Why a better relationship with God leads to better sex in your marriage (and a better marriage in general!)
Specifically why our male / female differences are so valuable
The shift from rule-keeping to image-bearing and what it means for our lives
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Find more from Joshua on his website at Joshuaryanbutler.com
If you enjoyed today’s episode, you will love Joshua’s new book, Beautiful Union!
You can break the conflict cycle in your marriage! Dr. Kim is hosting a FREE webinar on Friday 10/27. Get all the details HERE
Ready to gain REAL freedom and healing from porn in your marriage? Learn more about how you can do that with our new course, Marriage Undefiled: How To Overcome Porn and Heal Your Marriage HERE
Tue, 24 Oct 2023 - 57min - 710 - Awesome Marriage Podcast Trailer
This is the place for honest conversations and practical advice on how to have an awesome marriage. In this brief trailer, Dr. Kim Kimberling and co-host Lindsay Few share what you can expect to hear on the Awesome Marriage podcast each week.
If you enjoy the podcast, follow along here or at awesomemarriage.com/podcast for questions in each week's show notes that will help you and your spouse apply the info in each episode.
We pray this content is helpful for you and your marriage!
* Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
* You can find all of Awesome Marriage's helpful resources on our website.
Tue, 17 Oct 2023 - 02min - 709 - God's Design for Sex: What is a Gospel View Of Sexuality? With Dr. Juli Slattery | Ep. 578
What is a gospel perspective of sexuality? It’s hard to answer, since too often, sex is not talked about in the church. Yet it’s literally everywhere in the world around us. Most couples struggle with their sex life at some point and parents are deeply concerned about helping their kids navigate the topic in a God-honoring way in the midst of all of culture’s chaos. That is why we are honored to have Dr. Juli Slattery on the podcast today, sharing her vast knowledge and wisdom on the subject. You don’t want to miss what she has to say.
Episode highlights include:
Why a biblical worldview of sexuality is actually very freeing
How disruptions to your sex life can become a springboard to greater intimacy
4 specific aspects of God’s love that should define healthy sex in marriage
The process to engage so you can equip your kids to navigate sexuality biblically
Encouragement for couples who are struggling in this area
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
For more great info from Juli:
Her newest book: God, Sex, and Your Marriage
Her podcast: Java with Juli
Her website: authenticintimacy.com
Books by the authors mentioned in the episode:
Celebration of Sex, by Douglas Rosenau,
The Married Guy’s Guide to Great Sex and Enjoy! The Gift of Sexual Pleasure for Women, both by Cliff and Joyce Penner
Refresh your marriage this fall with the 4th Annual Online Marriage Retreat. The retreat is live NOW! This year’s theme is Refresh: Break Through the Barriers to an Awesome Marriage. It’s packed with teaching sessions from our amazing speakers to bring you practical ways to break through the barriers that keep your marriage from being awesome. Click HERE for all the details!
Set your marriage up for better satisfaction in the bedroom when you get your head in the game with the Think Sex Challenge!
Tue, 17 Oct 2023 - 54min - 708 - What Husbands Wish Their Wife Knew About Sex | Ep. 577
This week it’s the husbands’ turn to weigh in. Today we hear what men said they wish their wives knew about sex. Would your husband agree? Dr. Kim strongly encourages couples to talk about their sex life, not argue about it, but… most couples don’t! So listening to today’s episode together is an easy way to start the conversation.
Sex in your marriage matters because God created it to draw spouses together, but all too often pain and tension lead to exactly the opposite. Tune in today to learn the next steps in your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Some common Christian sex myths that might be hindering your sex life...
... And what the Bible says about them
Some really effective ways to talk about sex with your spouse ...
... And some others you definitely want to avoid
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Set your marriage up for better satisfaction in the bedroom with the Think Sex Challenge
The 4th Annual Online Marriage Retreat launches THIS WEEK! This year’s theme is Refresh: Break Through the Barriers to an Awesome Marriage and this retreat is packed with helpful sessions from amazing speakers. Click HERE for all the details!
Ready to gain REAL freedom and healing from porn in your marriage? Learn more about how you can do that with our new course, Marriage Undefiled: How To Overcome Porn and Heal Your Marriage.
Has sex has fallen down the list of priorities? In Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half Dr. Kim and Nancy tell how they have handled the challenges to their sex life later in marriage.
We highly recommend the book Celebration of Sex to educate yourself and your spouse on exactly what works for the two of you!
Tue, 10 Oct 2023 - 40min - 707 - What Wives Wish Their Husband Knew About Sex | Ep. 576
The wives have spoken! Today we share what women said they wish their husbands knew about sex. Would your wife agree? Dr. Kim wants couples to talk about their sex life, not argue about it! So an easy way to start is by listening to today’s episode together and talking about it.
Sex in your marriage matters because God created it to draw spouses together, but all too often pain and tension lead to exactly the opposite. Tune in today to get the conversation started!
Episode highlights include:
Tips to help balance the mental load spouses are carrying
Women don’t get tired of their husband’s compliments – with this 1 exception!
Practical reasons why it can be helpful to schedule sex
Addressing assumptions spouses make that will deter them from great sex
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Set your marriage up for better satisfaction in the bedroom with the Think Sex Challenge
Ready to gain REAL freedom and healing from porn in your marriage? Learn more about how you can do that with our new course, Marriage Undefiled: How To Overcome Porn and Heal Your Marriage.
Has sex has fallen down the list of priorities? In Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half Dr. Kim and Nancy tell how they have handled the challenges to their sex life later in marriage.
We highly recommend the book Celebration of Sex to educate yourself and your spouse on exactly what works for the two of you!
The 4th Annual Online Marriage Retreat launches NEXT WEEK! This year’s theme is Refresh: Break Through the Barriers to an Awesome Marriage and this retreat is packed with helpful sessions from amazing speakers. Click HERE for all the details!
Tue, 03 Oct 2023 - 41min - 706 - How Embracing Brokenness Brings the Life God Has For Us With Toni Collier | Ep. 574
We are delighted to have Toni Collier on the podcast today. Toni has spoken and written plenty about the way that embracing brokenness, though counterintuitive, is the key to experiencing a full life in Christ. She talked to Dr. Kim about how –and why– to effectively embrace your brokenness personally, what that means, and what it can do for your marriage and family. Don’t miss this grace-filled episode!
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The faith “secret” that transformed Toni’s perspective on brokenness
The deeply personal origin of Toni’s new book, and why a children’s book is so important
The biggest mistake she made early in marriage, and how she recovered
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Be sure to check out Toni’s children’s book Broken Crayons Still Color! It is beautifully designed to help kids deal with big feelings and gain the tools to handle them well.
And don’t miss Toni’s book, Brave Enough to Be Broken: How to Embrace Your Pain and Discover Hope and Healing, which is full of Biblical wisdom and practical tools to help you heal right where you are today!
Grow closer to God while you grow closer to your spouse with the 2-Week Couple’s Scripture Challenge! Click through for more info.
The mind is a powerful sex organ, and the 25-Day Think Sex Challenge is designed to help you harness that power to experience more fun, intimate and fulfilling sex in your marriage.
Tue, 26 Sep 2023 - 50min - 705 - How to Have a Thriving Marriage When You're in Ministry | Ep. 574
Ministry couples face both unique joys and unique challenges. If you’ve been around Awesome Marriage for a while, you’ve probably heard Dr. Kim say to put God first and your spouse second. But when your job is ministry, it can be really hard to balance your vocational ministry with your primary ministry - your marriage. Today we’re talking about how to keep your marriage thriving when you are in ministry.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The surprising data on how ministry affects marriage and family
Our personal experiences of what makes ministry hard on marriage
What to do if you work in a ministry culture that does not prioritize marriage or family
4 specific ways to protect and build your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
MENTIONED IN THIS EPISODE:
Don't let your ministry take out your marriage! The Sustaining Your Marriage In Ministry online course was designed to help you through the challenges you face. Learn more HERE.
Our friends at Emotionally Healthy Discipleship offer resources that equip leaders to lead from their inner life with Christ.
Anything you want to hear about that we missed today? Shoot me an email and let us know!
Tue, 19 Sep 2023 - 57min - 704 - "Are We There Yet?" With Jeff & Tami Allen | Ep. 573
You may know Jeff Allen from one of his many comedy specials on DryBar Comedy, Netflix, Amazon, YouTube, network TV and more. If you do, you know he can make you laugh about even the hard parts of life and marriage.
In today’s episode we get to go behind the scenes of some of the hardest seasons Jeff and his wife, Tami, experienced in their marriage, and how God brought hope, healing and redemption. Don’t miss this encouraging episode!
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The *surprisingly* effective way Jeff’s comedian friend helped him find Jesus
What changed in Jeff and Tami’s marriage when Jesus entered the picture
Jeff’s journey to sobriety and learning new coping mechanisms
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Get the rest of Jeff and Tami’s story in Jeff’s Book “Are We There Yet?: My Journey from a Messed Up to Meaningful Life.”
Jeff’s comedy is a part of this year’s Online Marriage Retreat! Registration is open NOW so click over to learn more!
If it’s been a while since you felt sexy or were excited about your sex life, our 25-Day Think Sex Challenge will help you get back in the mood! Learn more HERE!
Fri, 15 Sep 2023 - 53min - 703 - The Mental Battle For Your Marriage | Ep. 572
Your mindset has a powerful impact on everything in your life - including your marriage. Is yours helping or hurting your marriage? Today Dr. Kim shares some sneaky ways your thoughts might be harming your marriage, without you even realizing it, as well as practical advice for how to overcome them.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How to identify and correct unhealthy thought patterns
Why even our fleeting thoughts matter
One thing that prevents many of us from being honest with God and with ourselves, and how to overcome it
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Work on healing your mindset with the “Cut the Criticism and Cultivate Companionship” Bible Reading plan on YouVersion
If you’re a One Thing Subscriber, you know all about Dr. Kim’s Daily Declarations already! If not, sign up HERE and receive a practical daily step each Monday-Friday to help you be intentional about building your marriage.
If it’s been a while since you felt sexy or were excited about your sex life, our 25-Day Think Sex Challenge will help you get back in the mood! Learn more HERE!When you sign up for Dr. Kim’s weekly Dispatch email, you receive a copy of his Daily Declarations FREE as a sign up bonus!
Tue, 12 Sep 2023 - 36min - 702 - The Spiritual Battle For Your Marriage | Ep. 571
One reason marriage can be difficult is because it faces real spiritual opposition. 1 Peter 5:8 says the enemy is like “a roaring lion looking for someone to devour,” who would love to destroy us and our marriages. But Christian couples can be confident that God is on our side, He is for us and He has the victory.
So how can we be on guard and ready to fight for our marriage, spiritually? Tune in today to learn how. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Reasons why marriage is a target of spiritual attacks
Ways spiritual attacks can show up in marriage
Steps to fight back and fight for your marriage in those times
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Dr. Kim shared his heart behind our Marriage Changers membership in today’s episode. Get more info on the membership HERE.
We are happy to have 50+ AM YouVersion plans. Here are the two we mentioned in this episode:
Learning to Apologize Well In Marriage
If you haven’t already, check out our perennial fave House Prayer Cards. They’re Like Dr. Kim’s scripture on the walls thing, but without needing to repaint!
Our 2-Week Couples Scripture Challenge helps you fight for your marriage by building the habit of getting into God’s Word together.
Tue, 05 Sep 2023 - 41min - 701 - Life-Giving Rhythms in Parenting: Wives' Edition with Nellie Harden | Ep. 569
How should the rhythms of our child’s season of life inform our parenting? How can your family rhythms and routines cultivate the kind of family atmosphere you are longing for in your household and set your child up for success?
Today our special guest Nellie Harden helps you see where you are in this season of your child’s growing up years and how to parent well in this time.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The perspective shift to more peaceful parenting
Why to number the days of your child’s childhood
How our own perfectionism affects our kids and our parenting
The parenting shift we need in the second half of childhood
A practical way to reduce sibling strife
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Find Nellie’s book, learn more about the 6570 Family Project and more on her website
Here’s the article Nellie wrote for Focus on The Family that we loved: “Family on the Rocks!”
Taking a few minutes a week to check up on your marriage is simple and effective with the Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide
Our 27 Scripture Prayer Cards are both beautiful AND powerful!
Tue, 29 Aug 2023 - 1h 01min - 700 - Life-Giving Rhythms: Husbands' Edition with Justin Whitmel Earley | Ep. 568
This time of year, so many families are thinking about how to make this new school year go even better than the last. You may be wondering how you can possibly build in helpful, healthy rhythms when you’re Already. So. Busy. If so, you do not want to miss this episode.
Today our guest Justin Earley shares how to build intentionality and meaning into your existing family habits.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What our messy attempts at forming good habits can communicate to our kids (you might be surprised!)
The perspective shift that lets you take advantage of your family’s existing habits for good
What does it actually mean to be a spiritual leader?
Practical advice for wives who want their husband to lead spiritually
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Hear more on these topics in Justin’s books:
The Common Rule: Habits of Purpose for an Age of Distraction
Habits of the Household: Practicing the Story of God in Everyday Family Rhythms
Made for People: Why We Drift into Loneliness and How to Fight for a Life of Friendship
Find resources, writing an more from Justin at Justinwhitmelearley.com
The Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide makes it simple to check in with your spouse each week.
Tue, 22 Aug 2023 - 49min - 699 - How to Reset Your Thoughts and Habits with Debra Fileta | Ep. 568
Ever wondered why you can’t break a habit you hate or form a new one you want to start? Today’s bonus episode is for you! Debra Fileta always brings wisdom and practical tools to help us connect spiritual practices with mental health and relationship health, and we’re delighted to have Debra back on the podcast with us today. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why issues seem to surface at unexpected times and what you can do about it
The equation that leads to lasting change - and why most people get it wrong
How to effectively begin to break bad habits
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Debra has also been on these past episodes:
Choosing Marriage: Interview with Debra Fileta | Ep. 207
Love In Every Season: Interview with Debra Fileta | Ep. 411
Are You Really OK? With Special Guest Debra Fileta | Ep. 471
Oneness Vs. Codependency - What's the Difference? With Special Guest Debra Fileta | Ep. 511
We think you’ll love Debra’s new book, RESET: Powerful Habits to Own Your Thoughts, Understand Your Feelings, and Change Your Life
Are you getting the Marriage Multiplier? It’s a quick weekly email from Dr. Kim that gives you ways to intentionally invest in your marriage. Sign up HERE.
Fri, 18 Aug 2023 - 38min - 698 - Life-Giving Personal and Family Rhythms | Ep. 567
As we enter the fall season, it’s a great time to look at the routines in your life. This month we’re talking all about life-giving routines and rhythms. Sometimes in marriage, we can get into bad habits of conflict or miscommunication, BUT we can also use our habits and routines to build up our spouse and grow our marriage. Today we’re sharing some of our personal routines and family rhythms that help keep our marriages strong.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Dr. Kim’s personal routine and why it’s so important to him
The small things that don’t even feel like “things” – and why they matter so much
Practical ways to build the kind of culture you want to have in your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES:
If you’re not getting Dr. Kim’s One Thing daily email, sign up HERE!
The Weekly Marriage Check Up Guide makes it simple to check in with your spouse each week.
Get a better dinner experience when you bring good questions to the table with 52 Questions for Your Family Table
Tue, 15 Aug 2023 - 44min - 697 - Learning to Work as a Team | Ep. 566
We talk to a lot of couples who don't know what makes them a great team. And if you don’t know what makes you a great team, how can you operate as one? All too often, opposites attract and it takes intentionality to tap into all that God has for you in the gift of your marriage.
So today we’re talking about leaning into what makes you a uniquely gifted team in your marriage, and resolving the tension that comes from the ways we differ from our spouse.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
What are the common issues that keep couples from being a strong team?
Dr. Kim gives great ideas of creative solutions to issues
How to combat the competition that sometimes creeps into marriage
We share ways we’ve personally done this in our marriages
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Get the team conversation started with Team You & Me: A Guide to Approaching Your Marriage as a Team, a resource designed to help you be more intentional to tap into all God has for you in the gift of your marriage.
Dr. Kim and Nancy’s book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in Second Half is out now! Grab your copy HERE!
Related episodes you might like:
What is Team Language? | Ep. 501
Make the Most of Your Differences with Special Guests Jay & Breona Washington | Ep. 476
Wives Edition: How to Ask For Help
Tue, 08 Aug 2023 - 42min - 696 - Worth Repeating: Hope For the Unhappy Marriage With Special Guest Toni Niewhof
Has marriage been harder than you thought it would be? We often say there’s hope for every marriage, no matter where you are today - and there truly is. But you may be wondering how exactly to hold on and fight for your marriage if you’re in a really hard season. Today, we are sharing Dr. Kim’s conversation with special guest Toni Nieuwhof.
Toni is an author, speaker and family law mediator, and she brings such hope and wisdom in today’s episode. Tune in for hope and help to make the future of your marriage better than today.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The mental shift helped Toni and her husband keep fighting when their marriage was on the brink
Practical steps they took to start healing
Common issues Toni sees couples divorce over
How to change your mental narrative about your marriage
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Get more of Toni’s wisdom on this topic in her book, “Before You Split”
On her website at https://toninieuwhof.com/
And on the Smart Family Podcast
Are you willing to do what it takes to reset and renew your marriage? Fight for your marriage with the Marriage 911 online course.
Missed the other episodes of our summer Worth Repeating Series? So far we’ve aired:
Worth Repeating | Be Your Authentic Self in a Superficial World With Special Guest Sam Acho
Worth Repeating | Breathe: Don’t Be Prickly
Worth Repeating: Cultivating Curiosity & Courage with Special Guest Bob Goff
Tue, 01 Aug 2023 - 48min - 695 - Worth Repeating: Cultivating Curiosity & Courage with Special Guest Bob Goff
How can curiosity help you have an awesome marriage? How can you grow yourself and your marriage, even in the busyness and life’s changing seasons? As we share some of our favorite past episodes this summer, we are so happy to re-air Dr. Kim’s interview with Bob Goff. Bob and Dr. Kim talked about how to dream big, be courageous and grow closer with your spouse. Don’t miss their encouraging conversation today - it’s certainly worth repeating!
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The role curiosity plays in keeping you - and your marriage - interesting
Learning to align your dreams as a couple
What to do if you don’t have any big dreams to chase
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
27 Scripture Prayer Cards combine the power of prayer and the power of God’s Word, designed beautifully to help you invite God’s to work in your marriage
Find Bob @ bobgoff.com
Check out Maria’s new book, Love Lives Here
Dr. Kim especially liked Bob’s book Everybody Always
Missed the other episodes of our summer Worth Repeating Series? So far we’ve aired:
Worth Repeating | Be Your Authentic Self in a Superficial World With Special Guest Sam Acho
Worth Repeating | Breathe: Don’t Be Prickly
Tue, 25 Jul 2023 - 38min - 694 - Worth Repeating | Breathe: Don’t Be Prickly
One common theme we hear from our couples at Awesome Marriage is that life and marriage have been difficult the past few years. The unexpected and unpredictable realities have taken a toll on many of us, and the anxiety and angst have made us quite “prickly.” In today’s episode, Dr. Kim and Christina talk about that prickliness and help you evaluate if you’ve been a little prickly and if so, how to work through it.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Defining exactly what we mean by “prickly”
Dr. Kim shares some healthy ways to deal with the pain
Red flags that can help show us our prickliness
What do I do if this is me? What if it’s my spouse?
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Dr. Kim and Nancy’s book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in Second Half is out now! Click HERE to grab your copy!
27 Scripture Prayer Cards combine the power of prayer and the power of God’s Word, designed beautifully to help you invite God’s to work in your marriage
Tue, 18 Jul 2023 - 29min - 693 - Worth Repeating | Be Your Authentic Self in a Superficial World With Special Guest Sam Acho
We’re on our annual summer break from the podcast, and during the break we love to re-air favorite past episodes. Today we’re sharing Dr. Kim’s conversation with former NFL linebacker Sam Acho, a speaker, podcaster, and humanitarian. They had an honest and encouraging conversation about what holds us back from being authentic and how to break through fears and be more real.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The breakthrough that first helped Sam to stop hiding & pretending he was ok
Why the closest relationships can also be the places we feel the most insecure
Why the small steps we take to be real are actually big!
Steps to take when you feel you’re not living in authenticity
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Dr. Kim and Nancy’s book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in Second Half is out TODAY!! Click HERE to grab your copy!
27 Scripture Prayer Cards combine the power of prayer and the power of God’s Word, designed beautifully to help you invite God’s to work in your marriage
Sam & Dr. Kim talked today about his book, Let the World See You, and he also has a new book, Change Starts With You: Following Your Fire to Heal a Broken World
Find Sam on Twitter and Instagram @thesamacho
Tue, 11 Jul 2023 - 48min - 692 - 5 Ways to Make It To Your 50th Anniversary | Ep. 565
Marriage is more of a marathon than a sprint, and to go the distance, it definitely helps to learn from someone who has gone before. Who better to learn from than Dr. Kim? He and Nancy are more than 50 years into marriage, and continue to have so much fun together. It’s not always easy, but it’s definitely worth it! Today Dr. Kim shares his top 5 ways to build a marriage you love that will stand the test of time.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Practically speaking, how do you put “God first, spouse second”?
Is the goal to just stay together - or to keep making the marriage better and better?
The power of looking forward to something together
Tips to reclaiming fun in your marriage*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Dr. Kim and Nancy's book Love, Intimacy, and Sex in the Second Half is out! Click HERE to order your copy!
When it comes to having fun and not taking things too seriously, Dr. Kim and Nancy have got receipts! See all the shenanigans on TikTok and Instagram :)
Want to have more fun with your marriage? Our 14 Days of Marriage Fun resource helps you break up the routine and enjoy more fun and laughter together!
Tue, 04 Jul 2023 - 25min - 691 - Recovering After Porn In Marriage: A Husband's Story with Matt Cline | Ep. 564
Recovery after porn is possible. Your mind can heal and you can break the addiction. Today’s guest, Matt Cline, is the founder and director of Restored Ministries, which leads men and women out of sexual brokenness and into a life of freedom and impact. Matt has seen countless lives radically changed around the world.Today he talks about his healing process, how God restored his beliefs about sex
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The God-given purpose of our sex drive - and why that matters
How do you define the actual difference between “sex” and “making love”?
Lies porn teaches us about sex and how to replace them with truth
Specific ways the mind changes after porn recovery
The process of turning temptation into an opportunity for worship
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Find all of Matt’s resources at www.restoredministries.ca
Restored Ministries is on Instagram @restoredsexuality, Facebook @ Restored Ministries, and the Pure Victory Podcast.
You don’t have to settle for a struggling marriage. The 90 Days to Save Your Marriage plan starts right where your marriage is today and helps get it on the road to healing.
Click HERE to preorder Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half!
Thu, 29 Jun 2023 - 57min - 690 - Recovering After Porn In Marriage: A Wife's Story with Dannah Gresh | Ep. 563
Can your marriage be happy, even after…? Our guest today said that, “About 70% of men in the church are struggling cyclically or addictively with pornography, and about 30% of women. It’s time to stop giving the enemy the power of our silence.” We completely agree! While this story is not easy to tell, letting light into our darkest places is how we will experience the healing God wants for us.
We are so thankful that Dannah shared her story with us this week. We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The antidote to “I don’t even know what to do” about this
Does a porn addiction always escalate? And why?
Some of the science behind why this addiction is so hard to kick
The impact of betrayal trauma on a spouse
RESOURCES
Order Dannah’s book, Happily Even After, for more of her story and insights Protect your kids from porn with the help of https://protectyoungeyes.com/ Click HERE to preorder Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half! Don’t settle for a struggling marriage. The 90 Days to Save Your Marriage plan starts right where your marriage is today and helps get it on the road to healing.Tue, 27 Jun 2023 - 49min - 689 - How to Rebuild Intimacy With Your Spouse After Porn | Ep. 562
If porn use has damaged your marriage, you may struggle to feel close and to re-engage in sexual intimacy. You know that healing is possible, but how do you get there?
Today Dr. Kim shares ways that couples can overcome the hurt caused by porn and re-establish the intimacy that will make the marriage thrive again. Time and again, we have seen couples restored, and their marriage even better than before. Tune in today and learn how this can be true for your marriage too.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Overcoming intrusive thoughts and insecurities
How porn and comparison are similar
Why the marriage can be better than before after healing from this
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Do you love the Bible app as much as we do? Do not miss Dr. Kim’s Verse of the Day on YouVersion Friday!
Keep your marriage thriving for the long haul! Order Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half!
Has the Awesome Marriage podcast helped your marriage? If so, will you take a moment to leave us a rating and review? They take just a moment to leave, but they do make an difference in getting the show in front of more people.
In Spotify, click the “star” icon right under the show’s heading
On Apple Podcasts, scroll down to the “Ratings & Reviews” section of the show page
Don’t settle for a struggling marriage. The 90 Days to Save Your Marriage plan is affordable, practical, and starts right where your marriage is today to get it on the road to healing.
Tue, 20 Jun 2023 - 43min - 688 - How to Regain Trust With Your Spouse After Porn | Ep. 561
Porn use is a pain point for all too many marriages. Today we talk about how to begin healing and rebuilding trust if porn has damaged your marriage. We have seen countless marriages restored from this issue, and we believe God can do the same for you and your marriage. Tune in to learn how you can begin to trust again.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
The key to knowing if your spouse has changed and is trustworthy
What if they haven’t changed?
Why confession is vital to healing and freedom
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
If you are ready to be free from porn, our friends at Restored Ministries offer several options to help both. Please do not hesitate to reach out.
If your marriage has been affected by infidelity, our online Affair Recovery Course can help. This course is helpful whether you’re just starting the recovery process, or are already in process. Use code: “AWESOMEMARRIAGE” for %10 off.
Has the Awesome Marriage podcast helped your marriage? If so, will you take a moment to leave us a rating and review? They take just a moment to leave, but they do make an difference in getting the show in front of more people.
In Spotify, click the “star” icon right under the show’s heading
On Apple Podcasts, scroll down to the “Ratings & Reviews” section of the show page
Learn how to keep your marriage strong for the long haul! Order Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half!
Tue, 13 Jun 2023 - 38min - 687 - How Does Porn Affect a Marriage? | Ep. 560
We know this topic is a painful one for all too many marriages, and we also know that God can bring full healing if your marriage has been damaged by porn. Today Dr. Kim shares how he’s seen porn impact marriages over the years, why it’s always a problem if it’s part of a marriage, and how to start breaking free.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Why porn use is never a one-person issue
Why keeping porn use secret makes it harder to stop using
Addressing common cultural myths about porn such as, “everyone does it” and “it doesn’t hurt anyone”
Steps to breaking free if you are using porn
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
If you are ready to be free from porn, our friends at Restored Ministries offer several options to help both. Please do not hesitate to reach out.
If your marriage has been affected by infidelity, our online Affair Recovery Course can help. This course is helpful whether you’re just starting the recovery process, or are already in process. Use code: “AWESOMEMARRIAGE” for %10 off.
Tue, 06 Jun 2023 - 39min - 686 - Summer Season Trailer: Here's What's Happening on the Podcast This Summer
Great things are happening on the Awesome Marriage Podcast this summer! In this quick update Dr. Kim and I pop in to talk about what you can expect and what you'll be hearing over the next few weeks. Plus an exciting announcement from Dr. Kim!
We pray these episodes are helpful to you and your marriage.
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
Learn to make your marriage strong for the long haul -- Order Dr. Kim’s new book, Love, Intimacy and Sex in the Second Half.
If you need anything from us, don’t hesitate to reach out at info@awesomemarriage.com
Fri, 02 Jun 2023 - 05min - 685 - When God Meets Us Where We Are with Eric & Erikah Rivera | Ep. 559
When Eric and Erikah Rivera met and started dating as high school sweethearts, they sensed God’s call on their lives. But they did not know how it would all unfold. Today they are church planters in their hometown of Chicago, and they graciously share their story of how God has met them in the midst of unexpected fear and pain, and the ways He has worked in each circumstance. Don’t miss this encouraging conversation with the Riveras.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
How sharing their fears and grief with each other led to increased faith
Unexpected ways God can use our trials when we invite Him to
Should the disciple be known as “Doubting Thomas” or “Ride-or-Die Thomas”?
When God doesn’t answer our prayers the way we hope
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
Application Questions:
What fears are underlying in your heart and mind today? What prevents you from speaking them?
Where do you need to see Jesus show up in your life today? In your marriage?
How do you need support in those things in your marriage today?
How can you better support your spouse in the things they are dealing with today?
RESOURCES
You can find Eric and Erikah on InstagramHear more on the Brook Church website and YouTube Channel
44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage: Sexual Intimacy Cheat SheetWed, 31 May 2023 - 46min - 683 - Unpack the Baggage In Your Marriage: How To Let It Go | Ep. 558
This week we conclude our powerful Unpacking the Baggage series with some details on the process of unpacking marriage baggage, and dealing with what’s underneath. I’m so thankful for Dr. Kim’s biblical wisdom on this topic, as well as the excellent guests we heard from this month. If you missed the previous episodes of this series, make sure to go back and listen for some powerful wisdom on how to heal your heart and your marriage.
We pray this episode is helpful to you and your marriage.
Episode highlights include:
Some of the physical signals that can help us prevent overreactions
Slowing down the process to identify relationship triggers
How to begin healing from relationship triggers and figure out what’s underneath
What to do if you don’t know what’s underneath
*Music for this podcast is created by Noah Copeland. Check him out here!
RESOURCES
44 Tips to Better Sex in Marriage: Sexual Intimacy Cheat SheetThe L.O.V.E. Your Way Through Marriage Course, by Chris and Jamie Bailey, is a journey of connecting and learning all the necessary steps to start having healthy conflict. Use promo code AWESOMEMARRIAGE for 10% off!
Tue, 23 May 2023 - 38min
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