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Welcome to Secret Mum Club with Sophiena, the ultimate space for all mums to share their secrets. Whether it’s something silly or serious, this is your anonymous haven to get things off your chest. Because let’s face it, we’re all in this together. Join content creator Sophiena and her fabulous co-host Emma Jones, who keeps things lively and uncovers your stories and secrets.
To get your secret read out on the podcast, email hello@secretmumpod.com, find us on other platforms here - https://audioalways.lnk.to/secretmumpodSN and like any good secret tell all your friends about us!
If you're interested in sponsorship and advertising in Secret Mum Club, then we'd love to hear from you. Just email sales@audioalways.com and we'll tell you more!
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- 144 - The Car Park Panic
This week’s extra secret has the ladies diving into some truly unforgettable (and slightly traumatic) moments, from leaving babies behind in car parks to being left behind on holiday! Plus, there’s a brand-new potty training anthem that’ll be stuck in your head for weeks. Don’t say we didn’t warn you!
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Thu, 21 Nov 2024 - 15min - 143 - The Library Log
This week, it’s all about sore nips and surprising discoveries. Emma shares her struggle with mastitis, while Soph finds an unexpectedly satisfying spot. Plus, they dive into a listener’s chaotic trip to the library and a hilarious mishap involving zombie makeup.
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Tue, 19 Nov 2024 - 55min - 142 - Mums On A Mission: Understanding Hormones
Next up on Mums On A Mission, brought to listeners by Lingo by Abbott, Sophiena and Emma talk hormones. To do so they're joined by Liz Earle for a discussion on how hormone changes, as we approach midlife, might impact our body and choices around sleep, food and exercise.
Will this help get Sophiena and Emma one step closer to completing their health goals? Listen to find out.
Get 15% off* the Lingo 2-week Learn Plan with code SMC15.
*Code valid until 31 December 2024. New Lingo customers only. Not to be used in conjunction with any other offer. Please see hellolingo.com/uk to redeem offer.
Lingo is not for medical use. 18+ only.
© 2024 Abbott. The biosensor housing, Lingo, and related trademarks are marks of the Abbott group of companies. This podcast and the guests are part of a paid advertisement for Lingo.
#HelloLingouk
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Fri, 15 Nov 2024 - 16min - 141 - The Fancy Drink
The ladies hear from a listener who found out they were pregnant in an unexpected way. They also read a mum’s story about a surprising breakthrough in potty training, and we find out what the ultimate fancy drink is, according to a toddler.
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Thu, 14 Nov 2024 - 15min - 140 - The Great Groan
Soph’s back on the house renovations this week, flexing her savant flat pack skills, while Emma’s been dealing with manual baby evacuations. Plus, we hear from one mum whose itchy leg shenanigans ended up not being stealthy at all.
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Tue, 12 Nov 2024 - 53min - 139 - Mums On A Mission: How To Eat Right
Week three of Mums On A Mission, brought to listeners by Lingo by Abbott. Sophiena and Emma are making good progress and starting to feel the benefits of tracking their glucose levels, but the time has come to talk about nutrition.
Today they welcome Dr Rupy Ajula onto the podcast to talk all things nutrition. What should they be eating? What shouldn't they be eating? And what role should food play in our lives?
Find out more at hellolingo.com/uk
Lingo is not for medical use. 18+ only.
© 2024 Abbott.
The biosensor housing, Lingo, and related trademarks are marks of the Abbott group of companies. This podcast and the guests are part of a paid advertisement for Lingo. #HelloLingouk
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Fri, 08 Nov 2024 - 21min - 138 - The Vernix Thief
The gallery fills up with another artistic masterpiece, sparking memories of the ladies’ childhood art attempts. They’ve also received a follow-up about the sewn sleeves predicament, and this week’s secret has everyone on high alert!
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Thu, 07 Nov 2024 - 16min - 137 - The D&V Diaries
Sophiena and the family have been battling a nasty bug, bringing with it the dreaded D&V (diarrhoea and vomiting). Meanwhile, Emma experiences the bittersweet milestone of sending Sadie off to nursery for the first time. Plus, we’ve got a secret to share about the infamous Poo Ninja making a surprise attack in one mum’s bathroom!
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Tue, 05 Nov 2024 - 46min - 136 - Mums On A Mission: Time To Get Moving
Sophiena and Emma have a health goal to hit and no time to waste. On today's episode of Mum's On A Mission, brought to listeners in partnership with Lingo by Abbott, they sit down for a conversation with wellness expert Adrienne Adhami. How can they master movement whilst contending with the busy life of a mum? And what's the smart way to exercise? Adrienne shares her thoughts.
Find out more at hellolingo.com/uk
Lingo is not for medical use. 18+ only. © 2024 Abbott.
The biosensor housing, Lingo, and related trademarks are marks of the Abbott group of companies. This podcast and the guests are part of a paid advertisement for Lingo. #HelloLingouk
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Fri, 01 Nov 2024 - 20min - 135 - The Spooky Special
Things are getting SPOOKY in the studio as the ladies embrace Halloween! They’re fully dressed up and ready to dive into your scariest secrets, from a possessed toy in the toybox to a smiling stranger in the bedroom!
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Thu, 31 Oct 2024 - 15min - 134 - The Creamy Confusion
There’s good news and bad news this week! The good news is that Emma’s mum is in town! The bad news? There’s a lot of bodily fluids involved. One comes from a listener who learned the hard way why you shouldn’t trust a “drink” made by a toddler, and the other is from Emma’s secret of the week, which involves a pasta and milky sick mix-up.
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Tue, 29 Oct 2024 - 45min - 133 - Mums On A Mission: Introducing Lingo
Welcome to this new mini-series from the Secret Mum Club, this is Mums on a Mission, brought to you in partnership with Lingo by Abbot. This mini-series will follow Sophiena and Emma as they strive to hit their personal health goals, with the help of Lingo and some fellow podcast hosts. In this first episode, Sophiena and Emma speak with Sophie Bertrand, a Nutritionist at Lingo, to get the lowdown on how the Lingo device can help them throughout their upcoming mission.
Your body has the answers. Visit hellolingo.com/uk
Lingo is not for medical use. 18+ only.
© 2024 Abbott. The biosensor housing, Lingo, and related trademarks are marks of the Abbott group of companies.
This podcast and the guests are part of a paid advertisement for Lingo.
#HelloLingo
Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.
Fri, 25 Oct 2024 - 15min - 132 - The Sewn Sleeves
After a full day in the studio, delirium is setting in for the ladies, and to make things even weirder we hear an interesting tip for dealing with thumb-sucking. Plus the ladies are torn when they learn about one mum's solution for tackling an unfortunate (and very messy) showroom toilet disaster.
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Thu, 24 Oct 2024 - 16min - 131 - The Soft Play Waterfall
Emma's back with exciting news about Joseff! The ladies catch up on everything that’s happened over the past month, and they read your lovely messages about conceiving in same-sex relationships. Plus, one mum shares her soft play waterfall nightmare!
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Tue, 22 Oct 2024 - 1h 00min - 130 - The Group Chat Gaffe
Sophiena’s sister Roxanne returns with a revealing secret from her football group chat. The ladies recap their hectic, eventful weeks, and Soph’s secret involves not one, but two trips to the hairdresser!
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Thu, 17 Oct 2024 - 23min - 129 - The Secret Sister Club
Another week, another special guest! This time, Roxanne joins Soph to answer all your questions, and things get feisty when they share their favourite childhood stories. Plus, we hear a secret about keeping an eye on your teens!
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Tue, 15 Oct 2024 - 45min - 128 - The Family Takeover
It’s a full house as Sophiena’s entire family joins the podcast! Dottie and Colby are ready to spill their secrets of the week, while we dive into how the children feel about going back to school and welcoming baby Renley to the family. It’s an episode filled with laughter, love, chaos and plenty of chatter from everyone… except Pizza Dick, who couldn't get a word in edgewise!
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Thu, 10 Oct 2024 - 21min - 127 - The Pizza Dick Special
Pizza Dick is in the house! Sophiena has successfully convinced Chris to join her in the studio, and they’re ready to tackle all your burning questions! We hear how he truly feels about the nickname bestowed upon him by Dottie, and we get an inside look into the life of Southampton’s wildest family.
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Tue, 08 Oct 2024 - 28min - 126 - The Panties Predicament
Soph and Emma share their public toilet nightmares and are wowed by one mum’s creative tummy time tip. Plus, a sweet message from Jess on her same-sex parenting journey, and a cringe-worthy camping shower secret!
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Thu, 03 Oct 2024 - 16min - 125 - The In-Flight Entertainment
The ladies are soaring high now that the podcast is available in the skies! To celebrate, Soph has brought in some fitting attire. Emma is in full pre-holiday prep mode as she gets ready for a month away, while Sophiena reveals a spooky family secret!
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Tue, 01 Oct 2024 - 50min - 124 - The Chilly PDA
The ladies dive into some juicy correspondence about the wildest (and chilliest) PDA ever witnessed! The farmyard animal toy pronouns debate thickens, and this week’s secret features one mum, a toilet seat, and a toddler on the verge of bursting!
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Thu, 26 Sep 2024 - 15min - 123 - The James Blunt Trump
It’s that time of year again! The winter clothes are making their comeback, which means plenty of shopping trips for the ladies with a measuring tape in hand. Sophiena’s getting down with Renley’s trumpets and James Blunt at the same time, and we hear about one mum on a mission to fill in for the tooth fairy.
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Tue, 24 Sep 2024 - 43min - 122 - The Phonetic Fail
The ladies start with a quick correction about the Fife Coastal Path before Emma shares her top tip for keeping skin silky smooth. Plus, this week’s outrageous secret comes from a listener facing a hilarious struggle with their little one’s phonetic spelling activities!
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Thu, 19 Sep 2024 - 19min - 121 - The Muff Guff
Soph’s been trying to get back into the swing of things with the school routine in full force, while Emma is blown away by the wonders of modern postal technology. The ladies also learn a new term for a queef, and Sophiena spills her secret about a car park encounter.
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Tue, 17 Sep 2024 - 49min - 120 - The Dummy Dilemma
The ladies get sucked back into dummy talk as one mum writes in about her struggles weaning her little ones off finger-sucking. Emma relates to the Secret of the Week, recalling a similar experience from her own childhood involving an x-rated keyring and a curious toddler. Plus, we feature a special clip from Sophiena’s appearance on the Mummy's Boy podcast!
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Thu, 12 Sep 2024 - 28min - 119 - The Disney Era
Before Emma heads off on holiday, she drops a delightful secret – she and Joseff have officially entered their Disney era, much to Sophiena's excitement! Meanwhile, there's exciting news as our gallery wall gets some fabulous new additions. And for the first time ever, we dive into a mysterious secret about cryptic pregnancy
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Tue, 10 Sep 2024 - 47min - 118 - Help I Sexted My Secret Mum Club
The ladies have teamed up with William and Jordan from Help I Sexted My Boss for an extra special crossover episode! The boys get a crash course in the messy realities of parenthood, leaving one of them feeling a bit light-headed (William) and one of them more broody (Jordan). We share a mum’s secret about a milk explosion, and the boys bring a few of their listener dilemmas on board, including the age-old question of whether you can stay friends with an ex.
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Thu, 05 Sep 2024 - 42min - 117 - The Bizarre Cape
As the back-to-school rush looms, the ladies get an interesting update from the OG Giant Pooer. Sophiena shares her family’s recent face-painting adventure where one person definitely stood out more than the rest. Plus, we’ve got a late-night nappy change secret that’s all too relatable!
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Tue, 03 Sep 2024 - 49min - 116 - Sunday Soak: The Perfect Day
It's the final Sunday Soak of the school holidays! As we prepare for the start of term, let’s take a moment just for you. This week, the ladies chat about their idea of a perfect day, and we hope the soothing music helps transport you to yours!
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Sun, 01 Sep 2024 - 17min - 115 - The Percy Problem
We hear one mum's secret about her new "friend" Percy the pile, who's been popping up in all the wrong places! William and Jordan from Help I Sexted My Boss have discovered the NoseFrida, and the ladies get a firsthand look at their hilarious reactions! Plus, Sophiena and Emma reignite their fiery debate about whether it’s ever a good idea to befriend an ex.
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Thu, 29 Aug 2024 - 25min - 114 - The Two Hundred Udders
Poonamis seem to be everywhere this week! Emma shares the chaos of dealing with one during her road trip to Wales, while another mum experiences a messy mishap during her first attempt at baby yoga. Meanwhile, Sophs has somehow dodged the trend and tells us about her serene family getaway. You've been busy sending in your back-to-school checklist ideas, and we’ve officially discovered the wildest location yet for listening to the podcast!
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Tue, 27 Aug 2024 - 55min - 113 - We'll Be Back Tomorrow!
Just a quick one from us to say that we will be back with our usual episode tomorrow!
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Mon, 26 Aug 2024 - 0min - 112 - Sunday Soak: Serene Snacking
It's time for you to kick back, jump in the bath, and enjoy these fifteen minutes of relaxing music away from the business of the summer holidays! This week the ladies talk about their go-to snacks when they have a moment to themselves!
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Sun, 25 Aug 2024 - 16min - 111 - Show & Tell with Katie Taylor
The ladies are joined by Katie Taylor, a Forest School Leader and outdoor activity specialist for the last Show & Tell episode! From wand making to ice play, she shares her top tips for keeping children busy whilst embracing nature.
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Thu, 22 Aug 2024 - 24min - 110 - The Milk Bar
Sophiena and Emma attempt to up their podcast game by not looking at their notes and discuss that big thing everyone suddenly talks about in their thirties (clue: it’s the gym).
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Mon, 19 Aug 2024 - 45min - 109 - The Sunday Soak: A Relaxing Beverage
Take a breather in between entertaining your little ones and enjoy this curated playlist of calming music as the ladies discuss their ultimate relaxation beverage.
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Sun, 18 Aug 2024 - 15min - 108 - Show & Tell with Mr P
Mr P joins Sophiena and Emma for a summer holiday Show & Tell! They talk about all things triplets and keeping your children safe online.
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Thu, 15 Aug 2024 - 53min - 107 - The S*** Drawer
Ever wondered about the best way to deal with clutter at home? Sophiena has a handy mantra this week to help. Plus, they discuss the joys of stocking up with stationary for a new school year for the Back To School Checklist.
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Mon, 12 Aug 2024 - 56min - 106 - Sunday Soak: Bath Time!
We're halfway through the summer holidays! Go you! Now it's time to take a break from the madness and enjoy this curated playlist of calming music while the ladies take you through their ideal bath setups.
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Sun, 11 Aug 2024 - 15min - 105 - Show & Tell With Jack Plummer
This week, the ladies are joined by Jack Plummer for the summer holiday Show & Tell! He shares a few of his top tips for keeping children active during the school holidays, and Emma talks about Sadie's first swimming lesson.
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Thu, 08 Aug 2024 - 34min - 104 - The One Mile Club
Sophiena recounts her awkward train ride to the studio, where she got up close and personal with a couple engaged in some serious PDA. Steffan has taken birthday surprises to the next level for Emma, and we hear about one mum's new windowsill ornament.
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Mon, 05 Aug 2024 - 52min - 103 - Sunday Soak: Take A Breather
This week on the Sunday Soak Emma shares her relaxing breathing technique, so get your candles on, put your feet up, and let's switch off for fifteen minutes.
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Sun, 04 Aug 2024 - 15min - 102 - The Train Accident
Changing a baby can be stressful at the best of times, but doing it whilst on a moving train is a recipe for disaster! Now that we're officially into the summer holidays Sophiena shares her first Show & Tell activity, and we hear a few of yours too!
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Thu, 01 Aug 2024 - 14min - 101 - The Gassy Labour
There are a lot of ways to induce labour but in this episode, we hear one mum's new, smellier method. Sophiena and Emma chat about the realities of potty training and organising the household, and we have a wonderful pregnancy reveal story.
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Mon, 29 Jul 2024 - 52min - 100 - Sunday Soak: Relaxation Routines
Welcome to the first Sunday Soak! It's a space for you to relax, take a breather and listen to some chilled out tunes with Sophiena and Emma guiding the way! So draw yourself a bath, grab a cup of tea or have a lie-down and enjoy these few minutes of bliss.
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Sun, 28 Jul 2024 - 13min - 99 - The Summer Begins!
It's official... Schools out for summer! And the ladies want to know your plans for the summer holidays! Let us know whether you're getting crafty with the children, taking them on walks, or going away for a week! You can email hello@secretmumpod.com or send us a message on our Instagram @secretmumpod.
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Thu, 25 Jul 2024 - 16min - 98 - The Muff Scissors
We're celebrating Sophiena and Emma's birthdays this week so there are plenty of bubbles, and outrageous secrets! Including one from a mum with a new way of using a bag for life, and another mum whose muff scissors took a trip to school.
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Mon, 22 Jul 2024 - 55min - 97 - The Bog Brush
It's so cute when babies learn to do things themselves... except when they mistake a public bog brush for a hair brush. Away from the listener's gag-worthy stories, we hear hard facts about getting pregnant whilst breastfeeding and we get a truth bomb from a five-year-old.
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Thu, 18 Jul 2024 - 13min - 96 - The Silicone Investigator
The ladies are shining a light on a wide range of creative ideas this week, including beautiful artwork for the Secret Mum Club Gallery, new and innovative uses of certain phallic objects during hide-and-seek and Jackson Pollock inspired living room furniture after a naked shart.
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Mon, 15 Jul 2024 - 46min - 95 - Introducing... The David Potts Show
We've got an extra episode for you this week, courtesy of the David Potts Show! Sophiena joined the Ibiza Weekender legend, David Potts, on the sofa for a chat about Pizza Dick Chrissy, and the pink poo secret!
Listen to more episodes of The David Potts Show wherever you get your podcasts.
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Fri, 12 Jul 2024 - 45min - 94 - The Twins' Room
There are many nightmare scenarios as a parent, and today's extra secret of the week involving twins, a locked room and plenty of poo is most definitely one of them. We also have a gender reveal and the ladies find out which Hogwarts houses they belong to.
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Thu, 11 Jul 2024 - 17min - 93 - The Fanny Hand
There's a legend status letter in the Correspondence Corner this week, and it comes in from a mum who received a post-birth surprise. Sophiena calls upon Dottie for help during a shopping centre emergency, and Emma is juggling a nighttime routine with two babies!
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Mon, 08 Jul 2024 - 56min - 92 - The Amsterdam Bear
No one wants the responsibility of looking after a class bear, but one Mum tells us how she ended up showing their bear a brand-new world! We also hear about a toilet contraption that should be on everyone's shopping list, and the ladies find out there's a new name for tampons.
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Thu, 04 Jul 2024 - 11min - 91 - The Water Gun
We already know that children say the craziest things, but one secret involving a water gun comparison has our jaws on the floor! There’s been a lot of travel chaos this week as Sophiena deals with a train poo and Emma goes on a five hour drive with two kids. The ladies are also asked about the best way to tell your partner about pregnancy!
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Mon, 01 Jul 2024 - 47min - 90 - The Boob Train
There’s an iconic secret in our midst this week, and it starts with a boob massage video. The ladies chat about push presents and Sophiena has a new TikTok trend she’s obsessed with!
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Thu, 27 Jun 2024 - 14min - 89 - The School Bell
We're no strangers to saucy toys on this podcast, but one mum shares her secret that requires drastic measures. The ladies have been tackling daily mum life with Emma solo parenting and Sophiena wrestling her evergrowing clothes pile! Plus we're asking for your help decorating the studio, so if your children's drawings need a new home, send them in to the Secret Mum Club Gallery! You can find our contact info here: https://audioalways.lnk.to/secretmumpodSN
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Mon, 24 Jun 2024 - 47min - 88 - The Blow Off
There's a distinct whiff in the air because one of the ladies has BLOWN OFF. Not literally, but whilst searching for the best turn of phrase to describe releasing gas, they've stumbled across an old term their mum's used. Plus we've received intel from a listener about the hottest (and stinkiest) museum in town!
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Thu, 20 Jun 2024 - 19min - 87 - The Bare Hand
There's a trifecta of bodily functions in your correspondence and secrets including a smear test mishap, boob relief at a Busted concert, and a nursery poo gone wrong. The ladies have had tame weeks in comparison, with Sadie having a check-up, and Sophiena getting boujee on a night out.
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Mon, 17 Jun 2024 - 46min - 86 - The Daddies Special!
It's Father's Day! And to celebrate all the daddies out there Sophiena and Emma have put together an extra special little episode. Be warned, there are lots of tangents, outrageous dad stories and secrets including a Nair mishap that sends Soph over the edge.
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Sun, 16 Jun 2024 - 20min - 85 - The Big Nips
There's a lot of chat about wild number ones and twos this week, but some of it comes recommended by a highly ranked mum! We also hear an embarrassing mum moment and an awkward gift exchange.
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Thu, 13 Jun 2024 - 20min - 84 - The Lunch Break
There's not a lot that surprises the ladies, but this week's messages have left them with their jaws on the floor! There's a lunchtime mishap, a funeral faux pas, and of course, a little bit of poo sprinkled in for good measure. Plus Emma fills us in on the latest with Sadie, and Soph's secret is anything but a walk in the park.
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Mon, 10 Jun 2024 - 54min - 83 - The Bouncy Avocado
We've heard some crazy birthing stories... Well, now it's time for a crazy AFTERBIRTH story. Plus the ladies are rating one mum's birthing playlist and it's safe to say there are some bangers on there!
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Thu, 06 Jun 2024 - 18min - 82 - The First Anniversary!
The Secret Mum Club is turning one! Can you bloody believe it? And to celebrate the ladies are throwing a birthday party! There are games, some lovely messages and of course, cake!
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Mon, 03 Jun 2024 - 29min - 81 - The Fake Willy
Another week, another secret about willies! But this time, it's a case of mistaken identity. Plus we hear from a super mum who is doing all she can to make sure her little one gets the care they need, and one of our listeners has left the ladies hanging in suspense!
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Thu, 30 May 2024 - 14min - 80 - The Blowout
It's official... Baby life is in full swing and each day is blurring into the next for the ladies! But there's still plenty to chat about including a huge milk update from Soph, a very touching story about bonding with grandparents (get the tissues ready), Dads helping Dads in the loo and an unfortunate blowout in the park.
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Mon, 27 May 2024 - 40min - 79 - The Dropping Balls
Two things are flowing this week... all of your lovely correspondence, and the prosecco. Whilst enjoying the merriment of being out of the house, the ladies ponder upon a letter about dropping balls, the sexy numbers trend is back (and it's even sexier than last time), and there's a touching secret about the best time to try for a baby.
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Thu, 23 May 2024 - 14min - 78 - The Post-Baby Bowel Movement
The back-to-the-studio excitement continues with our first Monday episode back. Emma shares some incredible news and Sophiena has Renley's first ever secret! Plus, we hear about one mum's experience with homeschooling, there's a post-partum poo celebration, and we learn about a new way to use nappies in an emergency.
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Mon, 20 May 2024 - 43min - 77 - The Studio Soirée
After three months and fifteen home records, the ladies are finally reunited (and it feels so good)! But they're not the only ones in the studio. We've got two new faces on the block, and it's safe to say, they're definitely going to be the new stars of the Secret Mum Club!
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Thu, 16 May 2024 - 15min - 76 - The Defecated Baby
We're getting hit with some more classic Dottie truths this week, as a trip to the Zoo turns awkward. Both ladies have updates to give this week, Emma shares how her babies are getting on and Sophiena is back with more from the doctors!
Plus your secrets are as outrageous as ever with cleanliness being questioned and we're getting down with the trumpets out in the wild!
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Mon, 13 May 2024 - 40min - 75 - The Baby Spoon
Not long before the ladies are back together in the studio again! Until then, Jen's been back in touch to give us the inside scoop on her magic pumps, there's a huge announcement from one of our listeners and we hear about the next generation of the poo knives in the extra secret of the week.
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Thu, 09 May 2024 - 11min - 74 - The School Runs
The ladies have loads to catch up on this week, from Sophiena's disappointing doctor's visit and unfortunate school run to Emma's breastfeeding journey. Plus there is a genius secret from one mum who is winning at life, and another one involving double trouble... with twins!
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Mon, 06 May 2024 - 55min - 73 - The Chesticles
This week Sophiena and Emma chat about the reality of dealing with a looming childbirth after we hear from a mum who is weighing up her birthing options. There's another poo incident in the mix and the extra secret of the week has the ladies howling as it's a classic case of children saying the wildest things!
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Thu, 02 May 2024 - 15min - 72 - The Boob-Grabber-In-Law
Another week, another poo secret... But this time it involves a little bit of redecorating. We also hear from a first-time mum who has a handsy encounter with their mother-in-law. Sophiena's been having some lunchbox troubles, and Emma's sleeping patterns are slowly getting better!
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Mon, 29 Apr 2024 - 49min - 71 - The Speedy Delivery
The ladies are back into the swing of things, and they have loads of your messages and secrets to get through! So we're kicking it off with one mum's rapid childbirth, a listener having school troubles and a secret that will give you the willies.
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Thu, 25 Apr 2024 - 14min - 70 - The Fu Fu Sideburns
The birthing stories continue this week with Emma telling us all about her c-section experience and a listener getting in touch about her own surprise birth! It doesn't stop there though (unfortunately), because we're getting up close and personal with afterbirth too, and it's safe to say we're all off fruity drinks for a little while after hearing this story.
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Mon, 22 Apr 2024 - 52min - 69 - The Magic Pumps
Now that the ladies are officially back together, they've got loads to catch up on. Sophiena shares more about her experience in the hospital and NICU, and it's safe to say you'll need your tissues ready. Emma tells us all about how Joseff is getting along with his baby sister, and we have two incredible secrets involving a missing willy and sensual breast pumps.
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Mon, 15 Apr 2024 - 52min - 68 - The Babies Are Here!
Can you bloody believe it?! The ladies are finally back together but this time, they've brought along Baby Renley and Sadie! With their little humans in tow Sophiena and Emma have A LOT to catch up on.
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Thu, 11 Apr 2024 - 20min - 67 - The Baby Special... With Chris!
Sophiena’s back and this time, SHE HAS A BABY! We’re officially welcoming little Renley to the Secret Mum Club with a special episode all about his journey into the world. And whilst Emma is busy recovering and enjoying her own bundle of joy, we’ve roped someone in to help. Making his debut is Chris! (AKA Daddy, AKA Pizza Dick.)
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Thu, 04 Apr 2024 - 19min - 66 - The Mother's Day Special
It's Mother's Day, so of course Sophiena and Emma needed to do a very special episode, on this special day, for every member of The Secret Mum Club! Happy Mother's Day! They have some wonderful messages from you in Correspondence Corner, for the special mums in your life. You'll also hear from our podcast friends at Mummy's Boy with Arthur Hill, The Gossip Gaysand On The Sofawith Colson, Jack and Ben. Expect a "heartfelt" poem, love for Beyonce and why a loaf of bread is a perfect Mother's Day gift. Talking of gifts, Sophiena and Emma have picked up presents for each other (not bread) and discuss what a Mother's Day looks like in their households.
Want to get in touch?
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Sun, 10 Mar 2024 - 22min - 65 - The Best Bits: Poo Special
We're looking back at all the classic Secret Mum Club moments... and this time it's all about number twos! That's right, we're talking poo. It's a running theme on the podcast, and we do love a good poo story! So sit back, relax and let's enjoy some iconic toilet tales!
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Thu, 07 Mar 2024 - 29min - 64 - The Bonjela Baby
Another week, another story about children shouting out embarrassing stuff in public - and this time it's all to do with size! We also hear about a unique way of getting your younger siblings to stop crying, and we have a touching letter from Jess about her own tooth-breaking story. Meanwhile, the ladies have been battling with sleep, and dreaming of all the foods under the sun. Fair warning, they tell us about their latest cravings so if you're hungry... you're about to get a whole lot hungrier!
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Mon, 04 Mar 2024 - 50min - 63 - The Brainy Boob
If you're going to learn one thing from today's episode, it's that children are honest - they say it how they see it, and they'll tell you how they feel... even if it does involve violence! And we finally hear from a medical professional about c-sections!
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Thu, 29 Feb 2024 - 15min - 62 - The First One At Home!
That's right Mum's we're officially out of the studio and recording from home! And with only one disruption from Chrissy (it's not the Secret Daddies Club!), we'd call it a success! The bump countdown continues and it's safe to say those third-trimester symptoms are coming in thick and fast. Sophiena has a WILD secret this week, and Emma shares her children's party woes. Plus we have a sack full of your secrets... and they're eye opening.
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Tue, 27 Feb 2024 - 43min - 61 - The Instagram Live!
We had such a hoot during our first-ever Insta live that we needed to share it with you (just in case you missed it)! In this 10-minute, home-recorded snippet we hear about Sophiena and Emma's weeks, and it's chaotically fun-filled as always.
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Thu, 22 Feb 2024 - 10min - 60 - The Hairy White Bum
With not long to go, prep for the babies is underway in both households! As well as running around the house, Sophiena brings us a secret about Colby's football practice. And we have letters from you about an obsession with Hey Duggee (because who doesn't love the stick song??), a nurse's unwarranted nickname for "fu fu cottage cheese", and swimming pool changing room antics.
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Mon, 19 Feb 2024 - 45min - 59 - The Best Bits: Valentine's Edition
We've had a fair few saucy secrets from you, and seeing as it's Valentine's week, we're re-sharing our favourites! Soph and Emma run through some of the most iconic love-related letters, and react again!
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Thu, 15 Feb 2024 - 21min - 58 - The Valentine's Surprise
Love is in the air, and the itchy legs brigade is out! We've got three of your Valentine's related secrets and an extra special surprise for the ladies. Stepping away from all the romance we also have a whole bunch of your misheard lyrics suggestions, and they are GOLD!
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Mon, 12 Feb 2024 - 43min - 57 - The Floater Problem
It turns out Sophiena isn't the only one dealing with floaters in a pool... We hear from a listener who tells us about her own floater stories and there are more pronunciation mishaps at nursery! As it's Internet Safety week, we have a topical secret about keeping children safe online.
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Thu, 08 Feb 2024 - 12min - 56 - The Slutty Slug
It's finally happened... the ladies watched Saltburn. Traumatised isn't the word. But away from plug-hole licking, Sophiena shares Dottie's latest school troubles, we hear about one toddler's love for Lego Ninjas, and a Mum's loud return to the gym.
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Mon, 05 Feb 2024 - 43min - 55 - The Wild Urination
Be warned... this episode is full of surprises, and they aren't for the faint of heart. Firstly, we find out that Dottie isn't the only tooth-yanker out there, and then we have a secret with so many twists that you should definitely be sat down for this one.
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Thu, 01 Feb 2024 - 19min - 54 - The BFF Key Rings
Sophiena and Emma might be taking their relationship to the next level. After seeing Amanda Booth on TikTok's crafty clay work they're thinking of getting BFF Key Rings in the shape of their bum holes (yep, that exists!). As their relationship takes this new high, they also hear from a Mum who needs a bit of advice on administering Calpol, and a little one whose midheard lyric is ICONIC.
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Mon, 29 Jan 2024 - 45min - 53 - The Magic Photo
What’s creamy, lumpy, and definitely not cottage cheese? You’ll find out soon because this week the ladies dive straight into the bodily fluids chat! On a somewhat cleaner note, they also get some inside knowledge from a midwife, a listener shares their swimming journey, and there’s a case of a badly timed saucy photo.
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Thu, 25 Jan 2024 - 16min - 52 - The Hairy Bath
The BIG bumps are in full force with Sophiena having regular baths to help alleviate the pressure and Emma having trouble clothes shopping. But even with the bumps growing, the ladies still have time to read your wonderful letters and secrets! This week we have a baby who loves asking you to 'kiss it better', more chocolate starfish chat and a toddler taking inspiration from Shania Twain.
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Mon, 22 Jan 2024 - 53min - 51 - The Chocolate Starfish
Today's episode starts with a bang as the ladies launch straight into the poop shooter chat. And they find out that bum holes are as unique as snowflakes... according to one of our lovely listeners anyway! You've also written in about baby teeth woes, and an occupational hazard that comes with being a parent.
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Thu, 18 Jan 2024 - 17min - 50 - The Ham Chant
It’s been quite the week for the ladies, with Emma entertaining a toddler during a check-up and Sophiena facing her fears. But with your letters about poo on the floor, an incident at the opticians, and an exposing chant, it seems they weren’t the only ones! As always today’s episode has a healthy sprinkling of sing-a-longs!
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Mon, 15 Jan 2024 - 49min - 49 - The Poo Chopper
Not only is it our first Thursday episode of series 2, but it's also the 50th episode of the Secret Mum Club! To celebrate the ladies have more of your correspondence about going on trips without the kids, and there's an extra special surprise after hearing about an unusual use for a poo knife! And as usual, we have an extra secret of the week involving dental hygiene.
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Thu, 11 Jan 2024 - 16min - 48 - The Tooth Yanker
The ladies are back! It’s the first session of 2024, and there is plenty to catch up on. After jet-setting to the exotic lands of Paris and West Wales, both Sophiena and Emma have many tales from their travels. Plus there are your secrets about an unfortunate trip to IKEA, keeping caffeinated, and a lesson on how to pass the blame for your bum trumpets.
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Tue, 09 Jan 2024 - 49min - 47 - Happy New Year!
Welcome to 2024 boo! We couldn’t go without wishing you all a happy new year. We’ll be back with more Secret Mum Club antics next week!
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Mon, 01 Jan 2024 - 2min - 46 - Merry Christmas!
The ladies have a special little festive episode for you filled with presents, crackers and a cheeky bottle of non-alcoholic fizz! Despite there being no alcohol in the vicinity, it’s safe to say the bubbles have definitely had an effect!
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Mon, 25 Dec 2023 - 19min - 45 - The Family Gyno
It's our last episode before Christmas! And as always, you've sent in some whoppers. One listener tells us about her in-laws having a gynaecologist who is part of the family, we hear about a little boy's milk curiosity, and the ladies discuss the need for biology lessons after a Mum's letter details her husband's lack of knowledge on the female anatomy.
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Thu, 21 Dec 2023 - 18min
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