The LASTING LOVE Podcast

"I don't know if I'm feeling it. I'm not sure if I'm attracted. I still notice attractive people. I worry that we're not having enough fun. I've felt stronger feelings in the past. I don't know if this will go anywhere, and I don't want to waste his time or mine. Should I stay, or should I go?" Such doubts were common for Jana. Theo was an attractive guy who treated her great, so is the solution to find someone else, or can she resolve her doubts and create lasting love?Discover how Alisa Goo...

Is it worth the time, inconvenience, and money to go to singles' cruises, vacations, or conferences when you rarely end up dating anyone you meet there? Also, what about your church, social events, and other hangout opportunities? Is it realistic to pursue dates at these activities?This is Alisa Goodwin Snell with the LastingLoveAcademy.com. I have clients who go to events like these, and it's time that you benefit from the advice I give them so you can make the most of your social situations...

Singles frequently complain that dating apps don't work, there aren't attractive singles, all the good ones are married, and dating isn't fun. Additionally, they want to know what to do when someone wants to go Dutch. These were the questions and comments that Karen, a 38-year old divorced mother of three, had when she came in for her session this week.This is Alisa Goodwin Snell with the Lasting Love Podcast. I have nearly 30 years of experience as a Marriage and Family Therapist, author, pu...

(podcast includes a downloadable workbook) We've all had painful experiences that feed our fears or make us doubt ourselves and our future. We fear that we'll fail, we can't have what others have, and we'll experience the same problems over and over again. We're scared of abuse, loss, abandonment, rejection, and betrayal. These anxieties keep us from being courageous, prevent us from putting ourselves out there, and affect our ability to confidently and securely respond to conflict.&nbsp...

Tim and Tara's struggle with creating and maintaining a secure attachment pattern was so tragic and sad because it was unfortunately too common. Neither of them was involved in toxic behavior (addictions, infidelity, dishonesty, or abuse), and they both loved each other passionately. Nevertheless, they didn't trust each other, and their conflicts made it seem that breaking up was the only way to find peace.Discover the essential steps they took to shift from a fear-based relationship to a Las...

Tim and Tara's struggle with creating and maintaining a secure attachment pattern was so tragic and sad because it was unfortunately too common. Neither of them was involved in toxic behavior (addictions, infidelity, dishonesty, or abuse), and they both loved each other passionately. Nevertheless, they didn't trust each other, and their conflicts made it seem that breaking up was the only way to find peace.Discover the essential steps they took to shift from a fear-based relationship to a Las...

Tim and Tara's struggle with creating and maintaining a secure attachment pattern was so tragic and sad because it was unfortunately too common. Neither of them was involved in toxic behavior (addictions, infidelity, dishonesty, or abuse), and they both loved each other passionately. Nevertheless, they didn't trust each other, and their conflicts made it seem that breaking up was the only way to find peace.Discover the essential steps they took to shift from a fear-based relationship to a Las...

Tim and Tara's struggle with creating and maintaining a secure attachment pattern was so tragic and sad because it was unfortunately too common. Neither of them was involved in toxic behavior (addictions, infidelity, dishonesty, or abuse), and they both loved each other passionately. Nevertheless, they didn't trust each other, and their conflicts made it seem that breaking up was the only way to find peace.Discover the essential steps they took to shift from a fear-based relationship to a Las...

Tim and Tara's struggle with creating and maintaining a secure attachment pattern was so tragic and sad because it was unfortunately too common. Neither of them was involved in toxic behavior (addictions, infidelity, dishonesty, or abuse), and they both loved each other passionately. Nevertheless, they didn't trust each other, and their conflicts made it seem that breaking up was the only way to find peace.Discover the essential steps they took to shift from a fear-based relationship to a Las...

We've all been that person who's been in a social group or setting and noticed someone on the outskirts, the wallflower, the one who tries to start a conversation very awkwardly, or they only come with one person and they stay with that person the whole time. We've all seen these socially awkward situations and been afraid of being that person. We've also been that person who is new, sees other people socializing, and wants to be a part of that group. We're focusing today on HOW YOU CAN...

Have you been in a conflict with someone you really care about? You want to be patient and understanding of where they're coming from. You also need to be heard and tell them what you're thinking. You’re upset. You're trying to control your emotions and not say things that will hurt. And then you get to this point where it feels like you've hit a wall. The other person is defensive, angry, arguing, and not really listening to you, so you just want to throw your hands up in the air and walk aw...

Have you ever noticed that as a single person, it seems so many people are experts at identifying their exes as Borderline or Narcissistic Personality Disorder?It's common to hear these terms thrown around. It either makes you sympathetic for the person and what they've gone through (especially if they're attractive) or concerned that they're throwing off their responsibility for their issues by blaming their ex. Additionally, when everybody seems to be Borderline, Narcissistic, drug and...

Over 20 years ago, I was set up on a blind date, and when he called, I felt such an immediate connection. He was funny, charming, confident. It just was intoxicating. We stayed on the phone for hours. My cheeks hurt. After that conversation, he wanted to see me the next morning for breakfast, I could barely sleep, I was giddy. The next day, the connection was so immediate. We went on the date. There's a lot of other fun stories about that date. But from that point forward, we spent every...

When Jeremy walked into my office as a 22-year-old college student who had never been in a significant relationship and rarely went on dates, there were a couple of things that stood out about him. He was a little overweight. His posture really needed to be improved. He had that total nice guy look about him, which unfortunately can make him be undervalued and dismissed as a just friend. And he also had a style of clothing 10 years older than his age. He really needed to become more aware of ...

Tim and Tara were in their 40s. They both had two children from previous marriages. And they were having a tremendous amount of conflict in their relationship. When I first started working with Tim, he was very anxious, losing weight, couldn't really concentrate, and was desperate to figure out what was either wrong in the relationship or whether or not he should walk away. Situations like Tim and Tara's can fit for a lot of people. It's very painful and difficult when your relationship...

If you're like a lot of singles, one of the hardest questions to answer or statements to respond to is, "You're amazing! I can't understand why you're still single," or "How are you not married yet?" There are so many different things that singles struggle with in the process of meeting, becoming exclusive, creating a secure attachment, and getting married that it's not as easy as it seems. Simply being amazing isn't enough to guarantee that you're going to get married, so it's just one...

When my son was a teenager, he came to me and shared his fear that there must be something wrong with him because he was not in a relationship, like he felt so many of his friends were. As I talked with him about it, it was obvious that he had a view where he was focusing just on those people who did have relationships. He didn't see how many other people, just like him, were struggling to date or were not interested in dating, and they didn't have relationships. It forced me to go back and r...

If you ask someone if they want to get married, you'll receive a variety of different answers. But if you ask them if they want lasting love, across the board, you're going to hear, "Yes. They do want to love and be loved". You're also going to hear some skepticism about whether or not lasting love really even exists anymore or whether or not they believe it will happen for them.We are in a culture where this is a much more common problem than it's ever been before. In 1960. When my parents w...