Sex, Drugs & Lullabies

Michael and Wes are two gay man who wanted to be parents.

Harry Gration was a much loved presenter of BBC Look North, who died last year. Back in 2019, as part of the Sex, Drugs and Lullabies Podcast, Natalie Glanvill and Amanda White spoke to Harry, and his wife Helen, about their journey to have another child, at the ages of 68 and 51.

Helen Davies was already a mother – but she desperately wanted a second child.

Kay has faced multiple miscarriages. She talks about finding the courage to keep trying.

Kat has a condition which means she has heavy periods, which makes conception difficult.

Laura became pregnant through IVF, but the unthinkable happened.

Reverend Matt Woodcock talks about his journey to start a family.

'Lea' faced early menopause. It left her childless, and angry.

Wayne is a single, gay man who has been on a surrogacy journey.

We're taking a break but before that let's clear up the facts around fertility. We've been asking your questions to two professionals in the world of IVF and fertility.

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

This week Natalie and Amanda meet Carrie and Joel from Hull. The couple have used their experience of having premature babies to set up a business called Miniature Miracles for people who need small clothes. It is also a support line for people who have gone through the same experience.

"I was laid in a room with six other babies crying and my child was upstairs in intensive care with a big wire hanging out of her throat. I'd not seen her and didn't know what she looked like."

"She (Carrie) had to sign paperwork which said if Indie didn't make it, we were happy that it wasn't anybody's fault."

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

In this podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

In this week's episode, after unexplained fertility and knowing her chances of IVF being a success at the age of 40 were low, Helen and her husband decided to adopt.

"It seemed to be a desperate act to do IVF and I felt that I was sort of saying my genes are more important than someone else's genes...I just thought there are all these kids out there that already exist."

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

In this podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week we talk menopause, hot sweats, brain fog, insomnia, loss of joy - ring a bell? Nicola went through it and left her job because her symptoms were so bad. She wishes she had reached out and asked for help.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Each week we will chew the fat over everything to do with fertility.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

Steve from the award-winning You, Me & the Big C Podcast talks to us about the impact cancer can have on fertility. He and his wife Rachael had their embryos frozen before she started treatment for cancer.

"We have 3 or 4 embryos in the freezer...I've been asked before in interviews if I'd ever do anything with them and I really don't think I ever would."

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

In this week's episode we speak to Kat who has written about her fertility issues in a poem and the fact she won't ever have children.

"You can make a life even if you don't have children." "You will survive." "Bottom line, you're worth more than your womb."

This podcast is about IVF and fertility. Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Each week we will chew the fat over everything to do with fertility. This week we meet Alice Rose, a fertility mindset mentor about how to deal with the struggle to conceive. She set up an online community for people who need support through their fertility journeys and also presents the Fertility Life Raft Podcast.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

"I see it as an option, are you going to have ketchup or mayonnaise on your burger, I'm like am I going to wait to find someone or am I going to have a baby on my own, I see it as a normal decision."

Amy Hart spoke to us earlier this year (before revealing she has a new boyfriend) about why she would consider doing IVF alone. She decided to freeze her eggs after having a fertility MOT.

In the BBC's only fertility podcast, Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Each week we will chew the fat over everything to do with fertility.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

Former 'Strictly Come Dancing' star Ola Jordan talks about IVF & we get some tips on eating well when trying to conceive.

"(fertility) is a hard subject, people don't really talk about it because some people don't want to but for us it was the best thing we could have done, tell everyone. The pressure was off."

In this podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Each week they chew the fat over everything to do with fertility.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

Lots to talk about in this series, and some great guests, plus some very BIG news from one of our ladies. (Trigger... this episode talks about pregnancy so if you're not feeling strong enough to listen, maybe save this one for another time).

Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Each week we will chew the fat over everything to do with fertility. In the final episode of the series we meet Cathryn, a single parent who conceived her daughter using a donor egg and donor sperm. Natalie and Amanda also reflect on the last series and talk about what the future might hold.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Each week we will chew the fat over everything, this week we talk about age and does it really matter how old you are to become parents?

Harry & Helen experienced some negative comments about having a 3rd child later in life “Some members of our family weren’t keen on it; they thought I was too old.” “It doesn’t worry me that some of them don’t approve, that some of them almost don’t mention him at times which is a little bit strange because I wouldn’t do that the other way round.”

"Don’t judge that I’ve become a mum again at the age of 50. It doesn’t matter. This little chap is experiencing everything a baby should and a hell of a lot more. Love us for wanting to do this.”

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In the podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles trying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week Harriet tells us how she's managed to keep going. She's had both fallopian tubes removed and there’s very little chance of her falling pregnant naturally. She spoke to us week's after a failed IVF cycle. "How long do you chase it for before you say, that’s it, end of."

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In the podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

Warning, there is talk of pregnancy in this episode! “I wouldn’t have cared whether we’d had a little boy or a little girl as long as they get to come home with us this time.”

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In the podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week we hear about Shared Motherhood..."“It allows you to have two biological mothers, so you have the mother who has their eggs collected and you have the mother who carries the embryo and gives birth.”

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In the podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week we talk to Leila about the challenges she faced using a donor egg and why the term "genetic mother" can be quite painful for some mum's using an egg donor.

“At the time I felt like an oven, I’m going to incubate yours and another woman’s child, and then I’ve got to try and convince them that i'm its mother for the rest of its life.”

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In this podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week, we talk about adoption with Rozi from Hull. She has decided not to go down the IVF route for a child.

"We had been trying for five years at this point... I'd stopped doing everything... I refused to do things, I wouldn't go on holiday... I stopped living."

"We just don't want to have any medical intervention to get pregnant."

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In this podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure. Fran contacted the podcast asking for us to do an episode on Mental Health. In this episode she talks openly about what impact going through IVF had on her mental health and how she coped.

"I got really depressed and down and I felt like just a total failure and there was no point in life, everything was worthless." "Every day just felt like another day to get through for what reason."

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby..

In the podcast Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week we talk to Kay Crewdson who is Mummy to Ava and Media Director for @Cradle_EPL which supports bereaved parents with early pregnancy loss. "You may only be 35 seconds pregnant but you've already played out 35 years worth of memories just like that."

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

So you thought having a baby was easy? This podcast hears about the drama, indignity, tragedy and comedy of infertility. Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles tying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure.

This week we discuss donor sperm with Eloise the Editor of Fertility Help Hub. "That pregnancy was really difficult because it was mixed emotions for my husband of excitement and happiness mixed with sadness that he felt that someone else had facilitated me getting pregnant." If you're thinking of using donor sperm you can get more information & support via Eloise's website fertilityhelphub.com

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside. ***Contains strong language and adult conversation.*** You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or on Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Child or not, we are all part of the fertility family! Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk through their struggles trying to conceive and hear from others talking honestly and openly about their fertility challenges in a podcast with both hope and despair in equal measure. Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside. ***Contains strong language and adult conversation.*** You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or on Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Now that IVF clinics are starting to re-open patients will be wondering what safety measures are in place to help protect them from the risk of coronavirus & how their treatments can get going again. Join Natalie & Amanda as they explore the challenges clinics are facing starting back up again, the impact covid-19 is having on couples and what life is like in lockdown with a new born.

Originally broadcast on BBC Radio Humberside.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In this special episode, Natalie and Amanda speak to Anita who has had her IVF treatment cancelled, they get the facts from the Medical Director of the Hull IVF Unit and they hear from Corrina on what’s it’s like to be pregnant through the pandemic.

Child or not, we are all part of the fertility family! "We share more than what separates us and having these conversations we can become closer together."

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby

The series was full of great stories that just needed to be told because as we know, the road to a baby isn’t always straight forward and sometimes not possible. In this episode we’ve pulled together the best bits from our chats and if there’s something you liked to hear more of then you can go back and listen. The full series is still available.

Child or not, we are all part of the fertility family! "We share more than what separates us and having these conversations we can become closer together."

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Child or not we are all part of the fertility family! "We share more than what separates us and having these conversations we can become closer together." In this bonus episode Natalie Glanvill and Amanda White look at what family really means with the founder of fertility fest Jessica Hepburn.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Natalie Glanvill and Amanda White share personal stories about IVF treatment. In this episode they meet Laura who lost her baby boy Ralphie at just 30 hours old after having IVF. She and her partner have since had further treatment including ovarian drilling to try to conceive again.

"Am I a mum? I have given birth, I have a child but he isn't here. You wouldn't look at me and think I'm a mum. I don't have a house full of toys, car seat and a pram."

You can contact Natalie and Amanda with your stories: fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Lauren is an award winning podcaster (the BBC's You, Me & the Big C). She talks to Natalie and Amanda about being faced with the decision to freeze her eggs ahead of her treatment for breast cancer.

"People who go through IVF really want children...and I was like this is part of a process...I was trying to secure my future."

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Natalie Glanvill and Amanda White share personal stories about IVF treatment.

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

In Episode 8, Natalie and Amanda talk to Claire about what it's like to go through several miscarriages.

"I've got this baby doll called Luke that I've had since I was about 6. I remember cradling him and thinking I should have a real baby, not nothing. I even put him in the pram."

You can contact Natalie and Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Natalie Glanvill and Amanda White both had IVF and in this podcast they share personal stories about their treatment and others.

In this episode...Imagine being that woman who relies on egg donation in order to carry your own child? Nicky has donated twice, one of her eggs has helped to get a woman pregnant. We hear why at the age of 29 she decided to do something so selfless...

"It means there's a little piece of me somewhere, even though it's not mine, it's nice to know that my blood line carries on."

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.***

You can contact Natalie & Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

In this episode we hear from you! You've been getting in touch with us to tell us your stories of hope and despair of trying to conceive a baby from IVF to using an egg donor.

Amanda White and Natalie Glanvill talk about their personal experience of IVF treatment. Contains strong language and adult conversation.

In this episode they speak to Leanne who has written an article called ‘The Shit Sandwich’. She is currently childless and frustrated with her body for not giving her the baby she wants.

“I would allow someone to paralyse me with an injection if at the same time it can make me pregnant with that one in injection.”

“You fall into this level of desperation because you just think, you don’t understand this biological urge to be a mum and it’s my god given right to be a mum and actually it’s a privilege to be a mum.”

Contact: fertility@bbc.co.uk, or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby

Hannah and Lewis have gone through 15 rounds of IVF. Ten were fresh cycles. They've spent around £80,000. Natalie and Amanda meet them to see if their treatment was worth it?

This podcast explores the struggles, emotions, heart ache and indignity of struggling for a family of your own. Natalie Glanvill and Amanda White have both had IVF with different outcomes. Natalie's round was successful, Amanda is childless. They are trying to break the taboo and get more people talking about fertility. In this episode they explore how long to keep going. When is it time to stop fertility treatment and look at other options?

***Contains strong language and adult conversation.*** You can contact Natalie & Amanda fertility@bbc.co.uk or Twitter @sexdrugslullaby.

Two dads, a baby and one on the way. Michael and Wes (@twodaddiesUK) talk about surrogacy and using an egg donor. Natalie and Amanda hear about the complexity of UK law when using a surrogate and the hard work involved in finding the right egg donor.

"We are always going to have to explain where she came from and how she became part of our family."

They also explore the need for clinics to adapt to make the process easier for gay couples. "One clinic has taken our feedback on board and has replaced its material and now produces gay material."

Struggling for a second child? Feeling guilty because you want another one? Helen Davies, author of More Love to Give, talks us through secondary infertility, what is it and how is it different?

"People were saying at least you've got Zak and concentrate on Zak and all that money you are spending on IVF, that's Zak's money."

Helen describes her desire to have a second child and the pain and guilt she felt for longing to extend her family.

Contains frank conversation and strong language.

Simon tells us what it’s like for a man to go through fertility treatment & Natalie & Amanda pay a visit to the men's "special" room at the Hull IVF Unit.

So you thought having a baby was easy? This podcast is about the drama, indignity, tragedy and comedy of infertility.